my boyfriend and I engaged and we are planning our wedding for april 28th. my family is happy bc it is what i want and they know my boyfriend really loves me. On the other hand, my friends doesn't know him too well cuz, as long our relationship is long-distance, everytime he comes down here (to the Dominican Rep. ; hes from the states), we usually hang out ourselves. they aren't agree cuz as long my boyfriend (according to their opinions), is from scranton PA and they said thats a town, not a city, i will not have a good life. Not just that, but they asked me about his background which i consider good cuz hes graduate and working on an allied services company... the only problem is that hes still living @ his parents. but thats not a problem cuz his family will provide us an apartment. when i commented him about what they said, he felt bad and told me that he doesn't want nothing bad happening to me, but the best. I feel he loves me so much. i am too. what do you think abou this?
2007-01-10 01:34:14 · 22 answers · asked by *live,laugh,love* 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
I wouldn't let what others say bother me! My husband and I faced this problem we lived together b/f we married but no one wanted us to get married and now I know and he knows it was one of our best decisions we've ever made. They maybe upset and think they will loss you as a friend after your married, they maybe jealous, they may just be watching out for you -I am sure of one thing that they just care about you and don't want to see you get hurt. When men live at home all their lives till' their married sometimes it can be a bad thing, he is not yet experienced what it is like to have a household and does not realize what it takes and some men just want their wives to be mothers and do everything for them as their mothers have. So solution follow your heart, if your love is strong and you both want to be together you and he will work through any problems that come up. Even the little ones that seem to be big. Marriage is a frightening thing you are leaving what you have always known and entering the unknown, it is truely for the mature, honest folk, there is no room for jealousy and talking to one another about "EVERYTHING" is important so if one of you now has a hard time with any of these topics then there will be difficulties. Communication and loving one another "unconditionally" will help a great deal! If you have these things think nothing more of what others say. and keep in mind even if you don't have these things these things could come later if you start to work on them now! Good luck!
2007-01-10 01:53:18 · answer #1 · answered by sophia_of_light 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all, I have traveled through Scranton and it seems like a very decent place to live. Just because you are not living in a city does not mean you will not have a good life. Here in the states, most couples desire to be out of the city if they want to settle down.
Perhaps next time your boyfriend comes to visit spend some time with your friends so your friends get to know him better. As long as your family is happy, that is all you need. Your family ALWAYS has your best interest in mind and would let you know if they do not approve.
2007-01-10 02:04:45 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't let others control your life. Live it the way you want to. Keep in mind that it won't be like this forever. Soon he may have a good job and you and he can get a house of you own. And just because it is a town not a city doesn't mean anything. I lived in a town of less than 1500 people and there were two streets dedicated to $200,000 dollar houses. Plus, I also think your friends are scared of losing you. Well, some of them anyway. Go for what feels right and you honestly believe will make you happy in the end. Don't let others dictate this for you.
2007-01-10 01:42:39 · answer #3 · answered by azel951 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your friends aren't going to marry him....
I would listen carefully to what they say. Nothing that you've listed is even a logical reason not to like someone....because they live in a town and not a city??
The background question...also not particularly relavent. If he can support himself/you...does it really matter which degree he has? It's a whole lot more important to discover what you have in common, and reasons that you could make a relationship work. There are a lot of self-made millionaires who don't have a special degree in anything.
It's nice that his family will provide an apartment. I still would look at his ability to provide for both of you until you can get on your feet, and contribute signifigantly to the finances.
Good luck!!
2007-01-10 01:44:15 · answer #4 · answered by sacanda_trina 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I've been happily married to my wife for 14 years. We got married when we were 22 years old. At the time, almost all of our friends thought we were crazy - and most of them didn't come to our wedding. So, I'd say follow your heart, and if you want to spend the rest of your life with this man, then may God bless you.
As for where you will live, and what kind of house you will have, nobody can predict the future. Who knows, maybe with your support for one another, you could end up very wealthy. But that doesn't matter because we can't tell the future. What does matter is that you live every day to its fullest, and your life is filled with love. If you love this man, and he loves you, then be together, work hard, and let the future worry about itself.
Good Luck!
2007-01-10 01:42:28 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
You have to do what you feel is best. If your family loves him that is wonderful. I know it upsets you that your friends disapprove but Blood is thicker than water. I would make sure he got his own place before you got married though. Who would want to get married and then end up living with his parents because something fell through? Not cool! Also maybe you should spend about a month together before making the ultimate sacrifice of getting married. That way you will get to know each other better and learn what each others habits are like. It is hard to REALLY get to know someone when you aren't around them alot.
2007-01-10 01:44:59 · answer #6 · answered by liz g 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it is not probable a query of ok or no longer ok... yet, that's a thoroughly comprehensible place to be. Your chum is caught up in a mad love affair that has, particularly actually it seems, swept her off her ft. it is not that she's no longer questioning approximately you in the present day, that's purely that she's no longer questioning approximately anybody yet herself and her new guy. each and every so often, whilst human beings ping off and do rash issues like this, they are fending off telling the folk closest to them because of the fact they understand their judgment would be heavily questioned. they do no longer choose this! i might say, grieve what you sense you have lost and then initiate the approach of shifting on. As you do, ascertain - if and whilst this marriage is going down the lavatory - no remember while you're prepared to be there because of the fact the chum she will maximum truthfully choose at that component or no longer. wish you sense greater efficient quickly, that's a painful place to be.
2016-10-06 22:49:02 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Scranton, PA is a city. It is a small city, but it is a city.
Anyway, most of us in the USA want to live in the SUBURBS.
The suburbs are nice towns near the city, but not in the city.
In the US cites are considered mostly bad places to live unless you are RICH.
My cousin lives in a suburb of Scranton, she has a house with a back yard. She is very happy there. Her son (5 years ) goes to a good public school. In the cities, the public schools are not so good.
Believe me you will want to live in a suburb.
2007-01-10 01:43:51 · answer #8 · answered by ee 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your friends are only looking out for you. They don't know him, and they don't know the U.S. (Scranton IS a town, not a city, but you will still have a nice life there...towns and cities are more similiar to each other in the U.S. than they are in the Dominican Republic).
Tell them to back off.
2007-01-10 05:47:08 · answer #9 · answered by Pink Denial 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like your friends are jealous. If you love each other and he has nothing but the best intentions, then there shoudl be no problems. Maybe they are also having a hard time letting you go, knowing that you will be leaving them soon. Next time he comes down invite your friends to go with you guys so they can get to know him. If they still give you problems, don't wory you'll be leaving them behind soon enough.
2007-01-10 02:02:47 · answer #10 · answered by jaws1013 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋