how do i feel so down?

Question

I am a shy person and am trying to overcome it but nothing is helping. i have low self esteem and confidence due to the fact that girls in my office get more attention than me and ive tried to make myself feel good by doing my makeup and more effort with hair which doesnt help. I also feel i dont know how to make conversation with people and my interactions are awful

Answer 1

Just because the other girls get more attention that you doesn't mean they are better people than you. All the popular girls at school were pretty horrible actually. Just be yourself, accept that you are a good person and hold your head high.

Answer 2

I am sorry you feel low, the good news is that it will get better! Liking yourself is easier said than done but that is where time comes into play. For a start, confidence comes from within not the outside so if the make up isn't making you feel better don't worry. Do a list or get your friends to do you a list of all the fab things about yourself. Every one has talents, lovely personality traits and beautiful bits, they just need to believe in themselves a bit more. I have sufferered low self esteem in the past so empathise with you, my daily mantra is "every day my life gets better" (even if I had the odd bad day, it just makes me stronger and I appreciate the good days more!). If it makes you feel better I know some v.attractive girls and they have more hang ups and insecurities than those of "average looks" who are just happy to love the skin they are in.

Conversation can be tricky if you are shy but I find talking to a person about what they are interested in gets conversations flowing, music, sports etc. It puts them at ease which in turn puts you at ease (cunning!). It sounds simple, that's because it is! I hope your confidence grows, make 2007 your year to love you and don't worry what any one else thinks, if they are a kind person they will like you and be worth knowing!

Answer 3

Dont feel so down. Hey after all your a person and have the right to feel wanted like any one else. Low self esteem comes from lack of confidence which you cant fix if you dont make conversation. So the idea is to fix the self esteem issue.

For more information i recommend a website that gives helpful tips.

Answer 4

You need to start feeling good about yourself, which starts from the inside of you. Can you trace back into your early years what could be the cause of your low self esteem. Until you do no amount of make up or hair cut will help.
You should also try attending night classes, to build your social skills. Avoid pubs and clubs.
Don't worry.

Answer 5

Shyness is much more of a problem than most people realise.
My brother is dreadfully shy and he finds it exremely difficult to speak to anyone.
When I was younger I was shy to the point that I walked along with my head down so no-one would notice me!
The best advice I got was from my mother (who was actually an absolute battleaxe!)
She sat me down one day and said "are you ashamed of your family?"
I mumbled no
"Are you ashamed of yourself?"
Again my response was no.
"Ah!" she said,"then you are the ugliest, most disgusting horrible person you know then!"
I looked at her in shock and said NO.

She then smiled and said "Be proud of your background, of your family and of yourself. Beauty is, after all, only skin deep. People see your looks first but then it doesn't matter because your personality comes through. Lift your eyes, give someone a smile or a cheeky grin. When you speak to someone, don't worry about what to say because a conversation can go anywhere. Even if you only speak to people in business, be happy about who you are. They'll notice that and your confidence will grow and you'll bloom!"
That's almost word for word what she said and I 'lifted my eyes' gave a 'cheeky grin' and decided that I have a skill no-one in the world has!
Nobody, and I mean NOBODY, can be better than me at being me!
Treat the world with humour and laugh.


What's the worst that can happen!



Apart from that.

And apart from that as well.


Okay you've got me on that one, BUT
apart from those things - WHAT'S THE WORST THAT CAN HAPPEN?

Answer 6

Bless. You need to start believing in yourself. Dont worry to much about what you are going to say, otherwise you start panicing and then get in to more of a flusterd mess. You are a worthwhile person, everyone is in there own way. Get up and feel good about yourself, Think posative, be posative and the rest will fall in place. Get yourself out and about a bit as well, will help build your confidence. We are all nervous when we meet new people but remeber if you are yourself people will respect and like you for who you are.
Good Luck

Answer 7

I think that you do not make enough effort.
You ask questions but never post answers.
Read peoples questions, do some research and give some helpful answers. Give opinions that are your own rather than what you think will please. Get into the habit of interacting here and you may find it a little easier in face to face encounters.

Console yourself that if you do make yourself look a fool here, just create a new ID.
Good Luck.

Answer 8

Look out for a non dating singles club, like Bellagio Diners of Dundee and Aberdeen, in your area. They go to the movies, restaurants etc as a group on the understanding it is not a date but it is a social event. This takes away the sexual element while allowing you to mix with the opposite sex in comfortable circumstances. All members are vetted by the girls who run the clubs.

Answer 9

dont worry. not everyone has to be loud and noticeable. Some people look nicer when they quiet and smile.

Answer 10

start with a smile