My girlfriend and I have been together for a while now and I'm really starting to care for her a lot. I've never felt this way about anyone before and I know we are both in love with each other very much. The problem is, she has a past, and it is really starting to bother me about the stuff she has done before she met me. Don't get me wrong, she hasn't done anything illegal or anything, just relationship stuff, like, she's been married before and stuff like that. I don't know why it bothers me so much but it does and I can't seem to just get over it and it is definitely hampering our relationship over the past couple of weeks. Any advice on how to get over this little 'hump' would be great.
2007-01-09 23:59:23 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Just be glad that she is with you NOW... and that her past relationships weren't meant to last and it led her to you. : }
2007-01-10 00:03:35 · answer #1 · answered by ( Kelly ) 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, the first thing you need to put into perspective is that you cant change her past, so if you cant deal with it, you need to move on for both of your sakes. Discuss with her what bothers you and see if you can find some kind of resolve. Trust is the key to any relationship, whether it be a friendship or romantic in nature, so if you can not 100% trust her and feel comfortable with the relationship you have created with her, you need to move on. I do not mean to sound harsh, just realistic. What exactly bothers you? The fact that she has been with someone else? Don't compare yourself to others, be confident that what you have to offer is all she needs. Have better self esteem. Hopefully you will find a way to move on if she is the one you really want to be with. Good luck!
2007-01-10 00:08:03 · answer #2 · answered by nellyann1969 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
This is what my husband and I call our past lives. Everyone has a past and those experiences are what makes us who we are. You love the person she is Right? You have a past as well - maybe not as colorful but still memories and relationships with others.
Now stop it! Life is too short to sweat the small stuff.
Enjoy your life and remember - A past is a past and YoU are in the PreSeNt.... Years from now maybe you can look back and see YOU in the majority of her past and SMILE...
2007-01-10 00:13:20 · answer #3 · answered by Lovemydogs 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I have been through something similiar, and i may be wrong, but you may think because she has, she may expect you to live up to a certain standard or what not, I would just look past it if you can.
If you have never felt for anyone else like this before then it should be easy to look past this :)
2007-01-10 00:11:15 · answer #4 · answered by Idiotman 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you can't deal with something that happened before you came along which for all intents and purposes is none of your business then you aren't mature enough to be in a serious relationship!
2007-01-10 00:04:15 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is HER past. Don't live in the past. Live for today and tomorrow. If you really can't handle it, then part your ways. It will make it too difficult on both of you. I have been through it..
2007-01-10 00:03:59 · answer #6 · answered by St♥rmy Skye 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well she probably dont love her ex husband or she would still be with him and she is with you obviously cause she likes you. just think of it as she made a mistake about who she truley loved. if she did love her ex. dont worry about it. i love my ex.s some are really close friends.. i would just let it go.. talk to a counselor if you need help getting over it. other then that good luck! <3
2007-01-10 00:06:12 · answer #7 · answered by amanda 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you don't know WHY it bothers you, maybe you should just dump her and find someone with a less stressful past and less emotional baggage...
2007-01-10 00:15:32 · answer #8 · answered by Forlorn Hope 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well you can consider she must be honest since she told you about her past in the first place. ;o)
2007-01-10 00:12:14 · answer #9 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It shouldn't bother you, you will just have to get passed it if you really love.
2007-01-10 00:03:46 · answer #10 · answered by Denny O 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋