i have a boyfriend ... we have been together a long time now .. but recently i was told by a friend of mine and his that he was cheating on me i was devistated and when i spoke to him he dennyed it and promiced me that i was the only girl he wanted and he was really sorry id heard what i heard. i forgive him ... but since then ive not been able to feel the same i did about him as before ... i do love him but im just kiking myself because i dont know what to do ... anyone who has been in a situation or knows what i can do please help me because i need to get things back to how they were... do i stay with him or ditch him??
2007-01-09 22:32:22 · 15 answers · asked by vikki b 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
you lost his trust... as soon as you heard it, the trust went, regardless of whether its true or not... he has to gain your trust again (that's if he didnt cheat!) if he did, dump him for sure! good luck and even if you still dont feel the same, remember there are plenty of gorgeous amazing guys out there waiting! xx
2007-01-09 22:39:15 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As far as i know girls cannot figure out boys' characters within a short span of time.. Coz they do whatever to get a girl.. And ppl who have a lover behave differently in different places.. We should be careful with those ppl. Its better to go on with outsiders than taking your own decision. There is nothing necessary to your friend to tell something wrong about your lover.. But seeing from side everyhting will be differrent.. Better ask specific reasons why they are telling like that.. There might be surely some truth in it.. I wont say just get rid of him. Coz he might be a good person also. Nothing can be brought to a conclusion without nay investigation.. If you start beleiving him just for the reason that he has attracted you then everthing will collapse.. Take decision patiently.. All the best..
2007-01-10 06:52:13 · answer #2 · answered by prince 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is such a tough problem. You have to talk to him and trust your instincts. If you truly feel like he didn't cheat, or at least won't cheat again, time will help you feel better.
If your gut is telling you that something seems wrong, move on. You deserve someone who wouldn't cheat on you in the first place. There is no excuse. I know plenty of couples who have been together (dated and married) for a long time without any infidelity. You deserve better.
2007-01-10 06:43:33 · answer #3 · answered by ZenBrain 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Woh, hard one - you have my sympathy. If the person who told you had nothing to gain from telling you, then I would assume it was the truth, (because they wouldn't jeopardize losing two friends otherwise). However, this is not about forgiving and forgetting. Its about whether you can trust him again. No one else can answer that - only you.
Regaining trust won't come overnight so don't do anything drastic until you know the answer. Give it time - see what happens. If you are constantly looking for things to prove that he is doing it again, then your trust has gone and I would move on.
2007-01-10 10:29:58 · answer #4 · answered by intelligentbutdizzy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It always hurts to find out that we have been betrayed either by our friend or the boyfriend. It is still bothering you because you know that one of them is lying to you. I would be a little concerned about the friend. Why would he/she have told you this? Even if it were true, I can understand her saying something to him but not to you. After all she/he is his friend too. You asked him and he said it was not true. If you love him, then continue with the relationship and eventually things will get back to normal. Watch out for the friend though something tells me that this person is not really a friend.
2007-01-10 06:53:50 · answer #5 · answered by sunny 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends how you feel. Do you trust him? Are you really prepared to sacrifice your relationship on something your friend said? our boyfriend has denied he cheated on you and has apologised that you had to hear the rumour. He seems sincere. Do you believe him? If you don't believe him and you don't trust him then you're relationship hasn't got a leg to stand on anyway so personally I would end it. If you do love and trust him but you just feel a bit unsettled by this rumour, then give it time. Remind yourself it isn't true and concentrate on you and your boyfriend. It will pass with time. Good luck whatever you decide.
2007-01-10 06:46:37 · answer #6 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In your heart do you think he cheated on you? Thats what you have to ask yourself. Most women will actually forgive the man they love one affair. But if hes done it once, he may do it again. Honey without trust there is no relationship, and it sounds as though the shift in feelings are due to a breakdown in trust. No-one can tell you what to do, you just have to decide if you can trust him again, and if you love him enough to stay with him.
2007-01-10 06:48:38 · answer #7 · answered by Chickette 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
trust is all you need in a relationship that is the glue and with out that glue two people will never be as close as they were or together as they were
the only way to get that glue back is by finding the right amount of ingredients to make more glue and if their is not enough ingredients to make that glue and you will know that deep down in your heart if you have that ingredients (trust) or not .
if you dont have that ingredients or not eough move on to glue/ing something new
2007-01-10 07:47:51 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he really did cheat on you and is sincere about apologizing then it may be worth it to stay with him. He's going to have to work hard to regain your trust. I don't things will ever get back to what they were. If this bothers you then ditch him.
2007-01-10 06:37:57 · answer #9 · answered by Rocky 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
do whatever your heart tells you to do. never go by what other people suggest for you to do because they arent living your life or feel your feelings. if you love him and you truly believes what he says, then stay with him. youll be much happier and wont have any regrets.
2007-01-10 06:44:48 · answer #10 · answered by <3 me 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋