is this slutty?

Question

Okay, I didnt get many answers to this, which i asked last time so im trying again! I am 20 years old, I've had 1 boyfriend that lasted 2 months. I've made out with 44 guys, gone all the way with 2 of those, and just done stuff (more than making out) with like 8 of them. Is that slutty? And should i tell a guy that I would want to be in a serious relationship about this? Thanks.

Answer 1

I do not think it is slutty to have done what you have. Makeing out with someone while in some ways is serious, many belive it is standard for most relationships. Haveing had only gone all the way with only 2 guys by the age 20 is extremely respectable seeing as many of todays men and women have had many more "all the way" encounters before the age of 18. Haveing had 8 of the 44 guys go further than makeing out, but not all the way shows you do have morals, and values, you just also know what you like to do, and what you feel is still respectable. As for telling the man you wish to have a serious relationship with about it, that is something you would have to consider heavily before doing. Many men would rather not have to know about your past, however if the guy seems to genuinely love you, and wants to know just for curiosity's sake, then I would say you only tell him you have only gone all they way with 2 guys before, and maybe if he is receptive to that, tell him you have had a few other guys you went more than just making out with, but don't give him numbers as to how many, or how many you have made out with.

Answer 2

You should be honest. Its a matter of perspective. If you were a guy youd be cheered on. Its not a good idea to sleep with anybody you arent in a trusting relationship with. The past is the past. Just tell him the truth, and tell him you think youre ready something more serious than what youve had before. If he runs than his loss (guys usually run when they hear the word 'serious' anyways). Dont label yourself a slut, youll start beleiving yourself, then you really will be slutty. As far as partners go your probably below average for a girl your age (although that dosent make the average OK)

Answer 3

Girl, do you have a mother or some other female relatives around to give you advice?

First of all, slow your roll with all these guys you're doing things with. Are you trying to break some kind of record? You're 20, so you shouldn't be trying to get in a serious relationship. Get your education and career in order. Last, you should take a "no ask, no tell" approach to your history. If you believe you're putting a potential partner at risk of some STD, please tell them so your questionable ways don't effect the rest of us.

Seriously, if you have to ask if something is slutty, then...you have your answer.

Answer 4

Gee, 44? Did you keep a tally? Trying for a world record? Why are you making out with guys who aren't your boyfriend? And why are you having sex with guys who weren't your boyfriends? Not that you should be having sex before marriage, but usually people are at least going out with the people they sleep with or mess around with. That is slutty. It could definitely be a lot worse, but still.

Don't be too upset about it. You can't do anything about it now. Just take things more seriously in the future. And you should definitely tell men you date that you slept with two guys and messed around with others. Don't say how many you messed around with, or how many you made out with. If they ask, you should just say "a lot." If they persist, you could tell them how many. But be sure to let him know that you regret it. I don't think they're going to care much how many you made out with, but they might care if you tell them how many. Good night!

By the way, I'm 21 and a virgin. And no, I'm not a "holy roller" like that moron below me claims. I just don't think it's right to have sex before marriage.

Answer 5

I wouldn't worry about it. If you're 20 and you've slept with 2 guys, that's not even cloes to being considered 'slutty' in my book. As for the extracurricular activities besides straight sex, that's normal and natural and probably less than these "Holy Rollers" that are calling you slutty have done by age 16!
Enjoy yourself and don't tell everything you do to everybody you do things with unless they ask you...it's your personal behavior. Only your life partner desreves a history lesson in that department

Answer 6

While your dating history certaintly does not qualify as "slutty", you might not want to describe it in this detailed degree to your boyfriend.

Guys usually don't appreciate hearing about their girlfriends previous sexual exploits, as I doubt you would really want to hear of your boyfriends sexual exploits.

However, if your thinking about having intimate sex with your boyfriend, without a condom, you may wish to say something to the effect of "Hey Sweety, while you know that I wasn't a virgin before I met you, I never had feelings like this for anyone else and want to do something really special with you...I've been tested before I met you and am clean...if you go and get tested then we can become truly intimate ".

By taking this approach, you will show him that you are both truthful and are concerned for his health while simultaneously learning if he is clean.

Answer 7

I hope you know that you can get STD's by doing that. Yes, I think that it is slutty to makeout with 44 guys, **** 2 of them and have oral sex with 8 of them. Don't tell anyone that you want a relationship with unless he asks.

Answer 8

It is not slutty, you may just be a nymphomaniac. You only went all the way with 2 of those guys, all of them would be slutty. Don't tell a guy you like, he might not want to be with you if you do. The past is the past and can't be changed anyways.

Answer 9

NO it makes you modern...it makes you what every man nowadays wants you to be. Lie, Lie Lie...and keep lying. Never ever tell the truth. Never be honest about your past. Never say that it is part of you or your life. Pretend it was someone else that did it!!!. Become Schizoid and treat all the guys like they treat you...You will find that the nastier you are the more they want you!!!! The more you pretend the better person you are to men. If you want anyone to care about you the real you then hold back everything. Love, sex, information, truth honesty and most of all your heart...Boy have I learned or what...

Answer 10

well, i would say no. I only consider sex in this department. I have a fool proof theory. If you have slept with more people than you have fingers on one hand in the past few months, then yes. I know people that are 19 20 only having sexual relations for like 3 years
that have slept with more people than half of what you only made out with. I would consider other stuff foreplay.