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My g/f is pregenant and the baby isnt mine but we've been dating since she found out?
long story short, i just got out of engagement, and she wanted to be with me, but i told her i wasnt ready. she got with this guy then when i realized that i was ready to have a relationship again she dumped him for me, but not even dating for 2 weeks and she finds out shes preganent. the baby's father doesnt really come around, ive been supportive since day one, and want to help her raise her babygirl. even though she's not mine, i feel like she is cause ive been here since day one. besides her i was the first one to feel the baby kick, ive been picking out names, ive been doing the shopping, and planning with her, not the baby's father. she is now 8 months. but i dont know if she wants me to be "involved" as much as i would like to be, and its an uncomfortable topic to talk about, i want to know, what i should do. we've only been together for 7 months. i want to raise her like she is my own, but im afraid to ask. what should i do?

2007-01-09 18:04:25 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships Singles & Dating

17 answers

Do you think she's worth it? I don't think so, she couldn't wait for you and get involved with someone else and dumped that person for you, Who can assure you that she won't do the same with you in a near future for someone else? Perhaps she came pregnant from this last relationship; something very immature because to give a son to someone there most be because there is love among this 2 people and want to see the fruit of that love, she became pregnant like a mere can be, just for the simple fact the she had sex. I don't think you should take this responsibility with someone so irresponsible like you gf is, sorry, but that's how I see it.

2007-01-09 18:15:23 · answer #1 · answered by Javy 7 · 0 0

ok, before everything...it appears like she isn't completely keen to be a lesbian in each experience of the be conscious, or she doesn't nonetheless have considered a male. it really is a project. Why? i'm nerve-racking that you're growing connected to her toddler, or maybe as it really is born, and issues do not go completely down the line and he or she leaves you for a guy, your coronary heart will be damaged. The regulation is undesirable in maximum states on the concern of similar sex couples and childrearing. It does no longer enable a larger 0.5 to have joint custody once a baby's organic and organic figure splits up with them. this ability ten years down the line, even as little Michael, or inspite of you intend on naming him, leaves consisting of his mom, think ofyou've got no rights. no longer no matter if you raised him from day one, and poured your love and total life into his rearing. it truly is undesirable...i comprehend, yet you may evaluate all this. Your emotions do be counted. it truly is large in case you get entangled, yet you've not been consisting of her lengthy adequate to understand if she's sturdy. come across a sturdy lady friend. A lesbian who needs what you pick. stay contained in the marriage many years and then plan somewhat one...hassle-free adequate to finish being pregnant nowdays. Then, you'll comprehend it truly is sturdy adequate to rear a baby in. i desire it helps...:)

2016-12-28 14:34:04 · answer #2 · answered by allgaier 4 · 0 0

I figured that the baby wasn't yours when you said that you were a lesbian. That is a tough call to make and I don't envy you. But before you get too emotionally involved, more than what you are already are, you have to ask! If your g/f doesn't want you involved or on a limited basis, can you handle it? I mean if she only needs you there "sometimes" compared to "all the times" how are you going to feel? YOU have to be happy too you know! My advice is to just plain ask. How would you feel if you were in her shoes? Its a tough call for BOTH of you. Good luck, I mean that very sincerely!

2007-01-09 18:26:00 · answer #3 · answered by drew 4 · 0 0

the only thing you can do is just to sit her down and ask. You don't want to get attached to a child that she may just pick up and leave with or get involved in the child's life and her decide that she wants to be with the father. And if she has been with a man she may not be what you are looking for in the first place. If she just jumped up and left him for you what makes you think she won't up and leave you for another? So my advice would be to be blunt and bold about it and if she acts nervous or unwilling to talk about it than that is really the answer to your question that she doesn't want you to be there.

2007-01-09 18:16:03 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

You need to sit down and either talk straight to her or maybe write her a letter and give it to her to read or read it out loud to her. A two parent home is good for kids, but if she doesn't seem to be into you that much maybe you can ask to be a big part of the little girls life anyways. Good Luck to you!

2007-01-09 18:10:48 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

You need to talk to her about it I know it's difficult but you both need to know how the other feels. Her hormones are high getting close to the birth and so she may be emotional so reassure her that you are there to support her. Remember that she is the biological mother so she may not be willing to share the child at first so be patient and let her have the space she needs.

2007-01-09 18:16:55 · answer #6 · answered by Cheryl S 3 · 0 0

Tell her how you feel. Comunication is the key to making a relationship work. Your girlfriend needs all of the support that you can give her and if you tell her that you want to raise the child like he/she is one of your own, she might be really happy.

2007-01-09 18:10:42 · answer #7 · answered by audrey 3 · 0 0

I think you should find out if the gf is serious about a relationship with you or some guy friend of hers. She may be bi and not want to be serious with you right now. Don't fall in and get hurt!

2007-01-09 18:10:18 · answer #8 · answered by LSD 4 · 0 0

So....raise the baby as if she were yours...no need to raise her any other way. If you two love each other and can raise this child in a loving home then what does anything else matter.

2007-01-09 18:09:42 · answer #9 · answered by BabyGirl 3 · 1 0

can she get help from her parents . there is places that help people that have babys and they give you money to seport the kid. but i don,t know what it,s called for the mean time ask her if she would like you to be apart of the girls lift i think it a hounorble thing you are willing to do so way to go, good for you.

2007-01-09 18:14:28 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

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