Just curious...?

Question

I see a psychologist once a week, plus have the added bonus of being able to call her an additional 2 times a week. I find this helpful, however I am constantly worried that when I do call her I don't really need to talk to her and I am just wasting my time, because I should be able to deal with my issues on my own. I know she cares about me, as she is constantly telling me this, and she has never once turned me away or not returned a call, however I have never been able to alleiviate this fear, even after lengthy discussions with my psycologist about it. Does anyone else have a similar issue, I guess where they feel that they are not worthy of the help they are receiving?? I almost feel as though I am using her, although she has often told me this is not the case. How do I allow myself to believe what she is saying, rather than constantly questioning her every word and accepting that I am worthy of what she is giving me and that she truly does care?

Just a little note - I am not paying her, I see her in the public system which means I get her services for free. I am currently in between psychiatrists at the moment, as my old one left to have a baby, and I haven't had my first appt with my new one yet. I was on anti depressants, however took myself off them. I do take an antipsychotic, howver I only use this to help me sleep, as it has no effect on my mental health at all. I don't know if what I just wrote will affect any of your answers?

Answer 1

I went through something similiar, and it just takes time. She wouldnt leave you stranded, and she hasn't ever, right? From your question I get that you have troubles trusting people, and to work on that you just need to give your psychologist the benefit of the doubt. That she would not cause you any harm, and will not stop caring about you. It will be tough, but you must realize that your psychologist is in the human services field because she wants to help, and it would go against her if she stopped caring. Take baby steps, and tell yourself that she is there as long as you need her.

Hope it works out.

Answer 2

I think you need to understand that a psychologist is someone in the business of helping. This is not a friend; you are paying her for help with issues. If she take phones calls, them make the calls and do not feel guilty.

But you also need to be cautious that you are not projecting more on to her than is there. In other words, she is a counselor, and should not be viewed as a buddy. That doesn't mean she doesn't care; it is simply an acknowledgement of her professional role in your life.

Another way to say this is: don't take it personally. Take her professional advice, be thankful that you have a good counselor, but don't project friendship on to a professional relationship.

If you can remember that it is a professional relationship, then you will not feel guilty about "using" her time. As long as you work within the rules she has set up, you're not using her.

Finally, know that you are just a normal person asking a lot of logical questions. Don't overthink it. Be grateful for the advice she is giving and put it to work in your life. God bless you.

Answer 3

She chose it as her duty to assist people. You chose to seek assistance and she offered. If she offers, you are not using her, it was her choice. She could choose when to stop assisting you, but any psychologist who did that would be a failure at their chosen profession. A psychologist is much like customer support for a phone company. It is a service provided for your benefit and you can use it as much as you feel necessary without it reaching beyond their bounds. They are there to understand the issue and help solve it. Just relax and let them do their job to serve.

I must add, also, that I despise when people constantly tell others they probably need medication. The best situation is one where medication doesn't come into play. People have developed a dependancy on medication which is unjustified. The mind and body are well equipped to deal with most things on it's own and don't need the assistance of some bogus drug. If your health is deteriorating, sure, medication may be a good idea, but if it's not, try some natural healing first.

Answer 4

Hey girl, that's her job. She is supposed to make you feel good and make you feel worthy. She studied this career so that she can help people like you. She probably has a wonderful gift to deal with all kinds of people. If she is helping you, why worry so much? Accept her help, you may never find such a great psychologist again. Cheer up and be happy.

Answer 5

In this life we need all the people on our team. Your psychologist plays an important part of your team. I think you are doing fine. It's true that you should decide what you don't need to bring to her, but I think it's more important you decide what not to discuss with friends untill you do bring it to her.

Your friends play a role, just like your teachers play a role, etc. The trick is knowing what to bring to who. I think the deep things about you that you're trying to figure out is what you bring to the psychologist. She will have a unbiased, honest answer and experience to maybe dig deeper to find where it comes from.

Answer 6

Are you also seeing a psychiatrist? You should be also seeing one- he would be able to prescribe medications for you and you sound like you may need medication since you seem to be suffering from anxiety and self doubt issues. Counselors are good- which is who you are seeing and talking to however, you really need the doctor to evaluate you and prescribe medications. If you are already on some meds, I suggest you see him soon- he may need to change the medications or up the dosages. Your anxiety is unjustified and you need medication, not just talking, to help you deal with your stress and emotions.

Good luck to you--- I hope everything works out for you.

Answer 7

It sounds as if she really does care. It also sounds as if you are the type of person who has a hard time in believing what people say, especially when it comes to something that they say about you.

I think you should tell yourself that you WILL accept what she has to say as the truth, then practice, every time you see/hear her, that she is good and honest and really does care about you.

Answer 8

do u look to her as a trustful and close adult, maybe like an older sister or mom? I find dat pretty amazing, every phone call, sounds like a great and caring women with more quality in their services. As long as its helping u, i dunt think u shud worry about that.

Answer 9

Think about it this way, she picked her job for a reason and she is getting payed. Obviously shes not wasting her time, especially if its something she devoted her life to, think about your future? will you do what you want to do?

Answer 10

your psyco is obviously charging you by the minute, that is why she continues to answer your calls and visits, if thats not the case, perhaps she wants you for your body.