Several members of my family (they have money) forgot about buying for my infant on X-mas. They did remember me my husband and my two older children however. I am not angry at them They didn't have to buy anything for anybody but, It has hurt my feelings that my baby was basically ignored on x-mas. My older kids recieved about 50 gifts or so from family and my baby got about 5. Not that it hurt her feelings but my husband and I were shocked. Should we do somthing to prevent somethinglike this in the future? Also we saw alot of gifts from family members to my older children who are not related to my infant. Does that make a difference. Keep in mind my older children do not see there father (he is an inmate) and they do not know him. His family is close to me and they bought gifts for me and my current husband . I am not sure really how I should react. So far we have not said or done anything. Any ideas?
2007-01-09 16:27:19 · 18 answers · asked by Chrissy #1 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
My exhusband is incarcerated. I am not exactly upset just shocked. I don't care how many gifts we get. Keep in mind the ex-s family bought gifts for my husband as well... ( these are in response to some of the answers recieved) and my baby is 6 months old
2007-01-09 16:46:08 · update #1
I would also be concerned. It may have not been intentional but Christmas is a giving time of year and I would rather go without a gift than for my child or someone else's child being leftout. I would monitor the situation and as time goes by, and other events come around, such as bdays, etc., to see if it continues. It it does, then I would have to let some folks know how I felt about it. I was always taught; if you can't do for all, then don't do for one (especially in the same household). Hope this helps.
2007-01-09 16:52:50 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
First of all, I would not get too wrapped up about this, the baby doesn't know what the deal was. And expecting your family to keep to some preset gift limit for each of your kids, and a new baby is well, something I wouldn't get worked up over, unless it became noticable to the kid himself. In other words if one of the kids was 10 and getting 50 presents and the other was 6 and getting nothing, well then, I might say something. Why start a war over this? They remembered you, they remembered your husband and your other kids. Getting huffy over it will only cause tension for nothing. Did they send anything for the baby shower? Or when the baby was born? Or better yet, wait until next year and see if it wasn't simply an oversight, a last minute oh no! If your older children are not related to your your infant, whose kids are they? Also, if this other family you are speaking of is your former husband who is incarcerated, they are under no obligation to buy your infant anything, that baby is not realted to them. So, just make a point to see how it goes next year, and if its going to be that way, no point exposing the new baby to it, but no point making the older kids lose contact with that family that does love them. Good luck, this is a difficult situation and it wouldn't hurt to be patient and understanding and just look the other way for now. They may come to love and gift the new baby, or it may simply be they forgot?
2007-01-09 16:38:31 · answer #2 · answered by Tippy's Mom 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your baby is an infant! She can't even play with the 5 gifts she did get. A baby doesn't need 50 gifts; I understand that you're feelings are hurt but this isn't the proper argument to pick at. I think that the only thing you can do is let this go but if it hurts you so much, then go to your family and talk to them about this. However, your family has a lifetime to give the infant gifts throughout her whole childhood.
2007-01-09 16:43:02 · answer #3 · answered by Dimples 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes having children from different families does create gift problems on Christmas. Here's what I do when my son goes to his dad's I have some gifts for my daughter and we have a tea party or do crafts together while he's gone. Then on Christmas day for my son I have a few gifts for him extra because other family members tend to buy extra for my daughter. As far as babies go a lot of people don't buy gifts for the baby, depending on how old it is and if it needs anything. If you decide to talk to them next year kinda just say I don't know if I'm out of place or not but Can you give me some advice on this. What kind of things are you getting my kids so I don't get the same and that way you will know about what your baby will get from them.
2007-01-09 16:58:23 · answer #4 · answered by michelle 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a hard one. But maybe you and your new husband should just allow the older children to go to there fathers Christmas and you and your new hubby and child do something else. As the children get older you can explain why the older ones go and maybe you can start a new tradition.Maybe while there gone go shopping or go to a show or some fun activity that will make up for not going with the older children.It seems like that maybe kind of silly now but when your younger child gets old enough to realize there are no gifts, it will hurt him/her so if you start doing something different now maybe it will seem natural later on.
2007-01-09 16:39:58 · answer #5 · answered by dee 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I doubt that your family forgot your baby - probably they just did not get her anything because she is a baby and would not know the difference. Also, if she is very young and they just got her a gift when she was born, or went to a shower for you or something, they might not feel too obligated to get her something else. I think you should NOT say anything to the relatives; for one thing, gifts are not something to be asked for, but also I am just thinking that next year your baby will receive the same number of gifts as your older kids.
2007-01-09 16:34:45 · answer #6 · answered by Cris O 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please do not take this to heart. At this stage, your baby is very happy with lots of cuddles, food, sleep and clean nappies.
It is wonderful to receive gifts. It is also important to acknowledge the receiving of gifts, and to be gracious in accepting family member's wishes NOT to give gifts for your baby.
Have you had photos taken of your 6 month old? Perhaps you, your new husband, and your older children, could share the task of writing short thank you notes for the gifts you DID receive. Including a photo, with the notes, will be a treasured memento to those family and friends who don't get to see you on a regular basis.
2007-01-09 17:03:44 · answer #7 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's a baby!!!! At that age they are more impressed with the wrapping paper & the boxes the gifts came in. Besides, when did Christmas become a time to count how many gifts you receive from people???
2007-01-09 16:39:26 · answer #8 · answered by More Lies & More Smoke Screens 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They figure their not related to the infant blood wise. If you were to get pregnant 3 more times with your current husband do you think it would be fair to expect them to buy them gifts.
2007-01-09 16:42:32 · answer #9 · answered by mia w 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sorry your feelings got hurt but I honestly think you are really overreacting on this one. Every body loves babies, don't think she is unloved or unwanted. They probably just thought the baby was too young to care. Don't take it personal they did remember the older ones, the ones who would know if someone did forget
2007-01-09 16:35:36 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋