Do you consider it rude to approach someone and say something like "You look like you've gained some weight."

Question

I've seen people do this, even go as far as patting the person's stomach and saying something else along the lines of "Maybe you should do more sit-ups" or some other line about putting it on.

Maybe I just weave too much into things, but I don't really think this is a very polite thing to do---especially out in public.

What do you think?

Answer 1

I think it's really rude if a complete stranger, or even a casual acquaintance, walks up to you and says that. I mean, you hardly know these people!

Family and friends are a different matter, really. Sometimes they say it in a joking manner, not meaning anything offensive. And, of course, if they haven't seen you for a while and you've really put on weight, it can just burst out of them in surprise (believe me, I KNOW!!). In those cases, whether or not I mind or not, I just suck it up - I can understand the situation.

Then there are people who say "you've put on weight" like if it's the ultimate insult ( kinda like "you're FAT!!") or the really worst thing that could happen to you. I really hate when that happens, because there are worst things than putting on a little weight - I mean it's not like if I got stupid or dead or anything...SHEESH.

I usually don't mind if people (ie family and friends) point out my weight-y issues, because: 1) it's true, and it's not like I can hide it! and 2) their noticing it (vocally) can serve as an incentive for me to lose weight.

Modern society is TOO weight conscious in my opinion, and I've always tried NOT to let my weight become the centre of my universe. If other people decide that my is important enough in their lives to harrass me about it, then that's their problem. I'm not saying that I don't get offended or hurt sometimes, but mainly I just laugh it off - a few extra pounds is not the end of the world - and I have a life to live!

So the answer is 'yes' and 'no' - it depends really on the situation, and the people invovled.

Answer 2

This happened to me repeatedly a few years ago. I mean there's no denying I put on a few pounds, and I was fully aware of it. But I was just completely shocked that anyone would actually say it. It's the kind of insensitive statement that can cause someone with a weight problem to balloon out of control.

Answer 3

It's very rude. The person is probably more than aware of the fact and doesn't need it pointed out to them in such a rude manner.

Answer 4

Yes, it's rude. As someone who has struggled with my weight, I have encountered this.

Most people who have put on weight already know this fact, they live with their bodies on a daily basis. They don't need you telling them what they already know.

On the other hand, if you see someone you know, that has lost weight; tell them. When I was losing weight some of those compliments were what kept me motivated.

Answer 5

Yes that is very rude. I think the appropriate response would be to rub them back and say something like: Looks like we all have. Shall we exercise together?

Answer 6

what's more effective significant to you......your pastime, or getting even? because if someone got here upon that out you would possibly want to be in enormous trouble, and they are going to because human beings continuously whinge to a chairman in the experience that they get paycut and ask why.

Answer 7

Very rude. Would you like it if someone said the same or did the same to you? Probably not.

Answer 8

You know, of course, that this is rude but the question i would ask you is: would you tell the person who asked such a question that they were being rude by asking such a question?

Answer 9

Thats horrible. BEYOND RUDE.
If I was getting patted, I'd be punching for sure..

Unbelievable!

Answer 10

I dont think it is rude if one says with good attitude. He may be concerned about the other person's health and give this remark.