It seams to me that people only date from inside their circle. A friend, an acquaintant, a friend of a friend, a person at work, or even your mother's best friends child. With all the failed marriages in the USA today do you think it would be more prudent to reach out to meet someone fresh, or different than the norm? On my attempts to chat, converse or otherwise introduce myself to anyone in the USA I am met with COLD, hating responses. Have we become so afraid of people, that we will never take the chance that "This one might be the one." What are your thoughts? How did you meet your spouse, or X-spouse? I am just curious, because I actually had to meet and marry a woman from a different country, who had no pre-conceived notion of what she heard, or what somebody else says. I LOVE her very much, and she and I are very happy. I am just wishing this on everyone in the USA. I am only hoping this question will make people think more about how they choose a mate, or a date.
2007-01-09 11:31:32 · 7 answers · asked by Joseph L 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
i concur. The truth is fear and laziness. Do we really want to go across the world to find shelie mae or johnny james? No we dont.(sorry for the corny names, just an examlpe) Why? Because we think those folks are right here where we live and half of the time it is true. The problem is we are too locked down in the norms of how dating should be done and are afraid to really be adventurous and lively with it. So much so that even if shelie mae was in Japan we will gladly take betty sue (who wouldnt make us a bit happy) over shelie mae because we are too lazy and afraid to make that step for love. That isnt all of us, just alot of us. What does help however is what love can do. If you meet shelie mae from Japan one day and you fall in love or like her and visa versa then at some point you will be forced to decide. If she leaves but you choose her, then you take that step to be different and creative as opposed to letting her go. I dont know if this answered your question but i do hope it gave you some insight.
2007-01-09 11:44:39 · answer #1 · answered by Wheres the Rum Gone? 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry that you might think it's scary, but I met my current boyfriend through school :). I know he's not my husband and it may seem foolish, but we do talk about getting married one day, so maybe it will count (we've only been dating for a year).
When I think about how I met him, it's because I had a chance to talk to him at one of the lunch tables I sat at in school. He happened to be there and we learned more about each other and in time liked each other and started dating. I don't think I'd ever have a fear or "hate" to meet someone new, I just haven't had too many opportunities. I choose a mate on their inside person. For example, I love my boyfriend because he and I agree on so many things, it makes it easy for me to talk to him. He doesn't drink, doesn't smoke, doesn't want to have sex until he's married, goes to church, and has a steady job. These are all things that I adore and admire about him and I don't think I'd ever want to change him because he's him! Not because of what other people say about him.
I hope that maybe some of the other responses to this question will help me, too, to realize that there are only a few people who will date because of what others say about a person. I truly hope that people date for their own feelings, not for the feelings of others.
Best wishes.
2007-01-09 19:43:11 · answer #2 · answered by Pyrai 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like you've done well for yourself. A friend of mine married a lady from Russia and their marriage has turned out extremely happy also. But, many of these marriages don't work because of so many ladies wanting to come to the U.S. and will marry for just that reason. I am on my second marriage and found my wife from within my circle (church). My first a found outside my circle. This second marriage is absolutely wonderful. I am convinced that finding someone from within one's circle with similar interests is, generally, the best way to go.
2007-01-09 19:39:11 · answer #3 · answered by Don S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think the greatest cause of the surplus divorces today is when people in college (or even highschool), only date one person their whole life, and then they get married, and get divorced. people in highschool and college need to date many different people, if they date the same one their whole life- how will they know what other people are like. the more people you date and the more successful relationships a person has, adds so much more experience to a person in the dating world, and they can then have a better idea of what kinda of spouse they are looking for
2007-01-09 19:37:40 · answer #4 · answered by chris_m 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It's a process everyone goes through, if they choose. Everyones relationship is totally different from anyone else's that's what makes life great, we're not like robots.
2007-01-09 19:39:28 · answer #5 · answered by clbinmo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
im about to get married to a guy way out of my "circle". he's not a friend of a friend... he dont work with me.... and he didnt go to school with me. i met him at church. when i first met him i didnt like him at all... only because we was just alike. we both have smart mouths!! lol but i love him with all my heart!!
2007-01-09 19:38:39 · answer #6 · answered by * Miss Thang * 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
i happen to be georgous and i can date anyone i choose,,,married or single dont matter....so sorry for you....NOW!!!!!NEXT QUESTION??????
2007-01-09 19:36:00 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋