To be honest I am not happy with myself for many of reason. Especially when I came back from Iraq, I had so much going on in my head. I wanted to do everything. Meaning I need to and wanted to accomplish my dreams in such a short time, now I feel like I’m a fish in a bowl going around and around with just enough water. I think deep down inside that I know that the man I was with, was with me just for sex and his promises of us being together forever and marriage were as empty has the love I feel for myself. But I could not understand that or just not wanting to accepted that because him telling me that he loves me, he could not possibly be using me for sex their was no way. So since I have felt that way, I really feel like I do not have any self-worth because I could not keep this man happy. I was argumentive and I am an aggressive woman. My question again how do I find my self-worth.
2007-01-09 08:35:47 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Mental Health
Soul searching. Seek the Lord. He made you and he knows what the plan for your life is...he will show you your path if you seek after him and follow his ways.
2007-01-09 08:38:36 · answer #1 · answered by Shayna 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'll try to be brief, but it's difficult for me.
There's a couple of things you are doing that could probably be more skillfully handled.
1. You are basing your own self-esteem on someone else. As long as you are looking outside of yourself for self-worth you will be disappointed.
2. You are projecting, therefore attracting, a lot of negative energy. When all you are putting forth is negativity that is all you will receive - this is a law of the universe.
3. If you were in Iraq (huge respect from me, incidentally), there are probably some psychological issues you may be dealing with that neither you or I could account for.
You hold the key to your self-worth in your hands. You will have to start small and work up from there.
But first - please forget about that a****ole that you were dating. For one thing men are a little stupid - I'll be the first one to admit that. But we also don't understand women and are driven by our ego and sex. There's no way that this guy should have ANY power over you; but you have given him ALL of your power. You have given this bonehead complete control over you. Why would you do something like that? You wil NEVER be able to please this guy, so why bother?
Okay, so what should you do? The first thing you have to do is start putting some positive energy out. I am totally serious. I don't care how depressed you are, there is something in your life that you can look at and feel a little better - a pet, a photo of your grandfather, a song, a movie, I know there's something out there for you.
You have to start positivity therapy. Every time you start feeling bad about yourself, whip out your happy photo book, or put on the happy movie or song, and work at changing your mood. This is the only way you can break out of this negative rut you are in. As long as you are negative, you will draw negative.
Meditation, visualization, spirituality, all these things can start you on the path to positivity. But you MUST NOT depend on others for your well being. YOU are the ONLY person that can change you.
FP
2007-01-09 16:47:59 · answer #2 · answered by F. Perdurabo 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Uh-huh. Okay. Well.... first of all, you absolutely positively must must MUST stop linking the value of you as a person to the behavior of that man. Whatever he did does not matter. You need to focus on yourself and rebuilding your self-esteem and self-awareness. Do what you like to do. Do what makes you happy. Rather than running around in circles. Stop and take a breath. Go for a head-clearing walk and take a pad of paper. Make a list of all of the things that you want to do and visualize how to best accomplish these goals. Then, it's just about getting out there and making your ideas into realities. Good luck.
2007-01-09 16:45:55 · answer #3 · answered by Shibi 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, stop punishing yourself for this guy. Is he really worth beating yourself up over? Alot of men say they love you because they want sex. And unfortunetly us women fall for it and then feel very used!! Look at all your good points and the right man will come along and make you happy!! Good luck!! There are a few good men out there...
2007-01-09 16:42:49 · answer #4 · answered by truckmama_34 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All About High Self Esteem - By Barbara Rose
http://www.selfgrowth.com/articles/Rose12.html
2007-01-09 16:43:22 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
first you are beautiful that's an order find a younger guy who is committed to you first be for you fall in love have a baby and work at home play with that baby teach that baby and put your love your dreams in your child teach him/her not to leave home when him/her get older and lastly love your life you are perfect in every way. and only if you want remember god is their the are puppy dogs out their you can help someone and then the way they look at you should make warm
2007-01-09 16:46:48 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to get out there and focus on what you want to do with your life. then you can find a man after you have figured that out b/c a man won't make you happy with yourself. only you can.
2007-01-09 16:46:11 · answer #7 · answered by Essie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Eh? Your past has no reality regarding who you are.
2007-01-09 16:40:31 · answer #8 · answered by unseen_force_22 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
spell all out
2007-01-09 16:38:47 · answer #9 · answered by Baby 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋