My 5 year old hit someone at school?

Question

My 5 year old hit someone at school today. Apparently her and her friend got into an argument and it ended with my daughter hitting the other child. My question is this: How do I go about punishing her? I have never had this problem with any of the other kids and need some advice. Thanks!

Answer 1

Do what you will. I will tell you what I would do - A rule we have for all of our children is, "No getting in trouble at school" The consequence for breaking that rule is a spanking. I don't believe spanking makes children hit more. I have 3 daughters who all have been spanked quite a few times in their life, only once or twice have we given a spanking for hitting. All three of them learned not to hit from a young age. None of the 3 have hitting problems.

I suggest taking her to her room, having a long talk about other ways she could have handled the situation. Then take her pants down, lay her across your lap, and give her the spanking. After words have another talk about how she can avoid this type of punishment in the future, tell her things like "your too good and smart to behave this way" All this in order to build her back up. Also lots of kisses and hugs.

What ever direction you go in
Good Luck

Answer 2

Hopefully, the teacher put her in time-out or sent her to the office. This is the "consequences for your actions" conversation, with a dash of "use your words, not your fists." It's something you want to make sure she takes seriously. She has to know this is not the way people solve their problems. Ask her how it happened, and then explain to her that the argument couldn't have been important enough to resort to violence. Also, find out from the teachers what the policy is in the classroom for this behavior. If you have a handbook, go through it with your daughter, so she understands what will happen if she does it again. If you don't have a handbook, ask the teacher. Discuss their disciplinary policy (if you can, include your daughter in the discussion, so she understands that you are all on the same page). If you agree with their policy, tell them (in front of her) that you support them. It will go a long way to creating a uniform system of discipline for your daughter. It will also help fortify the teacher because she'll know that you're going to back her up if this happens again. You are all trying to help raise a responsible, compassionate girl. Dialogue is the best way to accomplish that.

Good luck, and I'm sorry this happened in the first place. But hopefully, it will help strengthen the relationship you have with her teacher.

Answer 3

I have a 6 and 7 year old. They know not to hit anyone, but they do hit each other (I guess thank God each other rather then a school kid) :)
When they do hit each other they are put in their rooms, no tv, or if it's in the evening, it's bed right then. I am sure you explained hitting is bad. You could have her make an "Im sorry" card, or call the parent and let your daughter say sorry. If this was the first time, I think an Im sorry, and the reasons why hitting is bad, is good enough, also explain what will happen if it happens again...Early bed for one week, no tv, etc... (When our kids do something that they did not know was wrong, we tend to go with explaining, and make them say sorry, but let them know what will happen if it happens again, because the 2nd time they know better. Good luck

Answer 4

Don't hit her!!!!... lol.... I always liked to watch a show with a child with a related scene and then talk about a better way of handling the situation. That way, she can be the third person to the scene and get what is wrong with hitting someone. Giving her better choices handling this situation in life. Sometimes, a whack is the only option but it should never be the first. And never over an opinion. I have been using this same kind of thing with the supernanny show thats on TV. You can count on the people to make big mistakes and taking a few minutes to discuss better ways for the children to behave or lack of manners always works for mine.

Answer 5

I have a 5 year old. Sometimes when they can't express themselves - or get frustrated they hit. They are 5 - I wouldn't make a case out of it unless it is habitual. If she has hit before and continues to hit no matter how much you try and make her understand it isn't o.k. (2 or 3 times MAX) then it is time to start punishing her by taking away priviledges. Like:

1. Everytime you don't use your words and hit someone instead you don't get to: (pick something)

My son was having a (loud voice - speak without raising his hand constantly problem). His teacher and I made a daily contract with him. We split the day into 5 segments: 1. Circle time 2. Story time 3. Recess 4. Kinderlab 5. Project time. Everytime he made it through one of those segments without speaking out of turn he got a happy face. If he got 3 happy faces a day he got a penny for his piggy bank (you wouldn't believe what my son will do for a penny for heavens sake:-). 5 happy faces earned him special time with Mommy. 3 perfect days a week he got to buy something special at the store (ok - it's bribery but its working ok :-)

My point is...if it's habitual. Try and create a contract with her with positive reinforcement for when she does well and take away privelidges when she doesn't.

If it isn't habitual...don't worry about it.

Answer 6

Sit her down and explain that hitting is not acceptable and if she does it again there will be consequences. Tell her what the punishment will be for future hitting and that should be that. You really can't do much about the initial event now, but she will know what is coming the next time she raises her hand to somebody else.

Answer 7

i'm satisfied to take heed to you've been disillusioned by way of this. It shows what an staggering figure you're. Your daughter is sufficiently previous to be reasoned with. try talking to her flippantly about her moves and tell her that she damage her classmate. i'm particular she did not advise to inflict any discomfort, yet she did. perchance take her into college the following day and performance her ask for forgiveness to him for what she did. As for a house punishment, i imagine an early bedtime is a good suggestion. perchance eliminate television or laptop time if she is attracted to both of those. i imagine maximum significantly, you want to communicate how she become feeling and what the right techniques are to cope with those agressive emotions. keep up the best artwork, momma!

Answer 8

as a 1st grade teacher, I can try to help you, a father should talk with his kid and ask him what, why, and how. get in that fight
the apology note is a very good way to avoid the "bully"
BUT, look for details, some times hitting is the only way small kids (no matter the height) have to defend, maye the teacher wasnt paying attention and avoid the other kid to pick on your kid, an he or she anly defend himsel, I am not telling you that I support that kind of behavior, explain and teach the correct way to deal with problems, try to be a good role model, sometimes the kids just imitate what they see in their own homes,

Answer 9

I think you really need to talk about the situation to her.. she may be 5 yrs old but she knows what's right or wrong... You need to explain to her that hitting is bad and that it is better for her to talk to her friend...kids are resilient she and here friend will be come friends again..punishment s good but its more important for her to understand what she has done...

Answer 10

ask her what her arguement was about
and tell her that hitting someone is not right
and that there are different ways of resolving a problem
like asking help from a teacher or another adult that's available at the time
and maybe no tv for that day