I am almost 21 and my husband and I have a 10 month old daughter. He is in the Army and we just moved from Iowa to Washington after he completed his basic training. I miss my family a lot and we have marital problems. He is very immature and does not help around the house and isn't very involved with our daughter. We just got married July 06. I get pretty depressed some days, although I don't let that affect my perfomance as a parent and I don't act depressed. I'm not very religious, I was a laid-back christian when I was growing up but stopped going to church when I was a pre-teen. He will be going to Iraq in May, and I will then return to Iowa to be with my family. But right now I just feel like I really need the kinds of things that going to church can give someone. I need the positivity of the people there, I need good people I can talk to, and I need hope. I think this might make my husband angry with me, but it's something I can't stop thinking about. What should I do?
2007-01-09 07:54:01 · 16 answers · asked by .*AnNa*. 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
I think my daughter could really benefit from going to church as well, and I'm not sure my husband wants us to be religious. But I don't want to raise my daughter to not believe in anything? I think the bible teaches very good things that I want to be a part of me and my daughter's lives, whether my husband believes them or not. Will I just be creating more problems?
2007-01-09 07:56:48 · update #1
Sounds more like you need counseling and a lawyer on standby while with your family. IF he's doing anything abusive, put a wee "bug" in his First Sergeant's ear... if the Shirt is anything worth his job, he'll put a stop to it, or intervene. ALSO make USE of the family support center and any information referral they can provide. A Shirt can advise he goes to counseling with you, or whatever he sees fit, but make use of your free priviledges as a military spouse.
_()_
2007-01-09 08:07:26 · answer #1 · answered by vinslave 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
By all means YES ! A good nurturing, Biblically Sound Church is just what you, and your Daughter need. Your Husband Too, but that is another matter. I am a Church Of God Minister, so naturally I would suggest that, but Church will be the best thing for you now.
2007-01-09 08:15:47 · answer #2 · answered by Minister 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sound to me like Go is calling you. Church families can be very supportive (I am a Navy Wife). You can also meet other women and families who are going through the same things you are.
Do what your heart feels is right. If YOU want to go to church go!! Don't force your husband to go if he doesn't want to just say I am going and I would like for you to come but it is OK if you dont want to. Then just Pray, God will hear you can do his will. Good luck to you in the future. Being married to a man in the military is very hard but can be very rewarding. Remember your husband is young and things could change as he matures. Just try to be supportive of him as much as you can and hopefully he will do the same for you. And If you need any advice on being a military wife. Feel free to email me anytime.
2007-01-09 08:14:48 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
i think you should! why wouldn't your husband want you to "be religious" as u said? oh, by the way, there is a different between being "religious" and being a Christian. "Religious" people tend to believe that they need to do lots of good works in order to get into heaven. They think they have to do something extra, even tho Christ already died for us and forgave our sins. And Protestant Christians, trust in Christ alone for salvation.
And if you do go to a church, like i hope you will, make sure you're comfortable there. It may be one of thoes big, 5,000 people churches, or it might be small. God with what you feel is right for you, but before you join, make sure that you check and see if most of your beliefs line up with those of thta denomination (for example, Catholics believe that you have to work your way into heaven. If you dont believe that, you probably shouldnt be Catholic.)
2007-01-09 08:10:26 · answer #4 · answered by Jesus_Freak 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think God is putting a calling on your heart. If I were you I would definitely find a good church to go to. I recently got married in May and went through the same situation with my husband. I just told him "I'm going to church, whether you come or not is up to you, but I hope you do come" We made an agreement that he would go to one service a week with. Meanwhile, I pray for him. If you husband gets mad, it is just Satan using him to stop you from going to church. Don't let your husband stop you from attending church. Choose God!!!!
2007-01-09 08:20:54 · answer #5 · answered by ANGIE 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I do not wish to be hard on you, but I see more and more couples who did not think these things through before they married.
The pastor should have offered counseling before the wedding.
Now, you have to follow your heart.
Being with people who have a good foundation will help you and your child a lot.
Get your act together since you will not be living together at the moment, and when he is back, you can see where he stands.
If you have given yourself to the Lord, and want to continue in that lifestyle, you need to be firm that if you get back together, you will still go to church and take your daughter.
If you decide not to stay in the church, you two need to really work on your relationship with one another before you move back in together.
grace2u
2007-01-09 08:11:54 · answer #6 · answered by Theophilus 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you will be, personally If your husband is going overseas I think you are highly insulting him and will have him worried about you waving a bible and pressuring your child to believe.
Taking her to church against his wishes is very very wrong, especially since he is going overseas to fight for our country.
I think for you to do this shows low character and is not only disrespectfull to him and your family but to the united states of america as well.
If he agreed, that is one thing, but if you feel he will be angry about it then you should not, you will put more strain on your marriage and will have him worry about what is going on over here when he should be worried about staying alive.
If you take her to church, and he is worried about that and doesn't concentrate as hard on what he is doing and gets hurt or killed, it will be your fault. And worse is you will never know exactly why, but will always doubt.
I suggest you find a support group in your area for wives of soldiers, or become friendly with other soldier's wives and keep your friends and family around you. Being with your family will provide the support you need, and you can always talk about teaching her something religious when he gets back.
2007-01-09 08:42:14 · answer #7 · answered by bluto blutarsky2 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think you should find a church. It’s a great idea. Just work on having a relationship with God. Work to get back all the time you have lost with him. More then anything he longs to be part of your life and your daughters as well.
Remember God gives us strength and He is waiting for you!
Isaiah 41:10
As for your husband pray for him!
2007-01-09 08:15:36 · answer #8 · answered by Melala 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Given the description that you have given of your husband, I find it hard to believe that he could give you one good reason as to why you should not go to a church. If he were a responsible person that sought to contribute more to the well-being of his family and had a sound reason for why it would not be good to go to church, I would give more attention to his opinions concerning this matter.
That being said, I think you should find a good church to go to.
2007-01-09 08:05:25 · answer #9 · answered by Pyebwa 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think you already know the answer. I think God has been urging you to go to church and to turn to Him with your troubles.
Please know that it is OK for you to go to church and take your daughter with you...I do encourage you to find a Christ based church, I go to a non-denominational....not connected with Presbyterian, Methodist, Catholic or any other denomination.
Remember that we, as Christians ARE the church and that God wants us to gather in his name to worship Him. We generally call the buildings the church, but really we are and we can worship Him anywhere.
I know that you are lonely right now and I know that God does put us in situations that will make us turn to Him and help us to appreciate Him.
My son is in the Army and I know it can be stressful and with a new baby I bet you feel as if life, as you know it, has changed in every way!
Pray....talk to God about it...he will continue to lead you! You will be in my prayers too!
2007-01-09 08:11:45 · answer #10 · answered by Buff 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋