its like the loss of a child.
but nobody seems to understand.
2007-01-09 07:29:33 · 14 answers · asked by neil s 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
No one would truly understand, unless they are in the same position but everyone could understand the hurt if you talked to them.......
My sister could not fall pregnant and I went through every painful day of I.V.F. with her, its heart wrenching
2007-01-09 07:34:36 · answer #1 · answered by xXx Orange Breezer xXx 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is truly an ordeal which often remains a secret to all around. I'm not sure if it can really be defined as a loss, but it definitely leaves an emptiness that cannot be explained but can be understood by everyone who has had difficulty conceiving.
I got lucky in the end, but I remember getting so cross at the numerous people who would come up and pipe 'don't want children then' or occasionally even a pat on the belly and 'no baby in there yet' AAAAAAGGGH I just wanted to scream 'nope it doesn't look like we can' but of course I smiled and said 'not yet'.
V
2007-01-09 07:49:39 · answer #2 · answered by vrbitta 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately that is the way society perceives it, maybe because unless you experience it no one can really understand how it feel. Similarly miscarriage is generally dismissed as natures way or lucky you there was probably something wrong with 'it' - and that is so unhelpful and unkind if it has actually happened to you. This is common to all experiences shared by a minority of society - for some reason society in general is only able to empathise with people in a similar situation to themselves. Infertility is a great loss to those that suffer it and should be treated as such, I hope that those who suffer it find the strength and support they need from their families and friends instead.
2007-01-09 07:37:45 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
People understand but I think that Dr's don't make it easy and come across as cold and uncaring.....infertility is awful for those of you that are going through it, weather your male or female....I have very close friends that have been through IVF and all the trauma that goes with it....by that I mean all the loss...loss of trying and not getting there and then the loss of deciding to go through IVF AND that not working either....I really feel for you, and I hope in the future you get what you long for...IVF IS a miracle and in the end it worked for my friends and they now have a son.....but like you say the loss that they had with miscarriages will always be with them...
Good luck
2007-01-09 07:40:26 · answer #4 · answered by Jp 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is a great loss. I understand that totally. It's worse than losing a child. You were never able to participate, had a chance in the first place. It's an unknown factor, and you do feel like you are cheated out of something. And as much as people push adoption, or fostering, there is still something to be said about experiencing your own miracle.
2007-01-09 07:39:08 · answer #5 · answered by raydeeo_face 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Miscarriage is the loss of an unborn child. Infertility is the inability to conceive. Technically speaking, you can't lose something that you didn't have to begin with. I understand that it can be just as heart-wrenching for infertile couples to not conceive as it is for couples to lose the pregnancy, but it's not quite the same thing.
2007-01-09 07:39:20 · answer #6 · answered by Tora 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
people don't talk about infertility here-only because everybody usually gets results with IVF and its so wide spread now days.
by the time people find out they are infertile they are aether ready for a head doc or adoption-not really for a debate on yahoo answers.
I AM TRULY SORRY FOR YOU LOSS but some people say that there is such a thing as destiny-maby you are meant to do something really important that does not involve having your own biological kid...
2007-01-09 07:41:34 · answer #7 · answered by nusha 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You can't lose something that you never had. Its a terrible ordeal, but its not a loss. Some people weren't meant to have children, maybe those are the people who were meant to adopt because there are so many orphans out there that need a loving home. You have to focus on what your purpose is, the positive side of things and what you have to give and not dwell on the negative and what you don't have.
2007-01-09 07:37:41 · answer #8 · answered by truly_insightful 4 · 0⤊ 3⤋
I dont want to upset you, but you have posted this question and I want to answer it.
It is not, in my opinion a loss. It is a lack. This is very painful too. It is not the same as having something and losing it. It is quite seperate and is awful in that you never have the thing in the first place. It leaves you with a gaping hole but a different gaping hole to the loss of your child.
2007-01-09 07:34:49 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
maybe its natures hay of keeping the population down??its not fair,especially when there are so many teen age parents who cant .don't know how to look after a child,and people have abortions and give children up for adoption
2007-01-11 22:45:06 · answer #10 · answered by pinkydinkydoo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋