on ground hogs day. It's a Friday and her step mother is having a hissy fit. Says that nobody can come on a Friday, yet my son's side of the family is all able to make it. Not sure what my question is but my soon to be daughter is very stressed and wants to go to a JP. What is the best way for me to help the decide or should I just stay out of it. I have a very good relationship with both of them
2007-01-09 07:16:46 · 13 answers · asked by grannypamrox 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
make sure they know it is their wedding and no one can interfere (sp?) and they can have it whenever they want :) i think you should advise them but make sure their interest is at heart.. tell them to have a lovely wedding x
2007-01-09 07:34:14 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Err, Congrats.
I don't know you nor you me, and I really am benign.
But there are sometimes private reasons for getting married on odd dates. Such might include: money: it might cost less on days that don't normally have a church or reception area booked; and time: the couple might be pressed for a day off together from work or school, etc. Or the couple might have picked an opening as a planned family addition is due (or they want one NOW.) Or somebody might really like groundhogs day! (after all it might be easier to remember...)
So, you could offer the children money in large enough amounts to ease some economic considerations and thus possibly ingratiate yourself with people that can help you live a fuller life, or choose not to do so. Or you might otherwise find a way to give the couple alternatives such as find alternative sites for a wedding and reception. Of course there may be nothing you can do about the wedding itself; but you can hold a different kind of happening to get the family together, as I agree, in this world families count.
Of course the worst case scenario is one or the other party is date rape drugging the other into it and will soon run out of dope! Don't laugh, it really happens. It did me.
2007-01-09 15:38:48 · answer #2 · answered by Wade H 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I think the best way for you to help is to speak privately with your future daughter-in-law and let her know that she has your support - whatever that may mean. Sometimes that's all that's needed. You could also ask her if she'd like you to speak with her step-mother, but I'd be careful about doing that without talking to the bride first.
A lot of brides get stressed before their weddings and consider eloping or going to the courthouse just to make all the madness stop. I've known several who have been in that situation - I'm getting married in October, and I'm hoping that the same thing won't happen to me!
Especially if she's been planning this for a while though, you could encourage her to just take some time out and think about it carefully. (Maybe offer to take her to lunch or an afternoon out to just relax and do some bonding.) It would be a shame if she ended up regretting not having her wedding. A JP may end up being the right thing for them, but they shouldn't make that decision rashly.
Best of luck to you all.
2007-01-09 15:52:13 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I have to agree with the other side of the family. You say that your entire side can make it but two people are getting married! Everyone wants to be involved in planning their little girls wedding and she should be able to have her family there as well. Im not sure why they would plan for a day where people work. Its hard to expect people to take a day off work to come to a wedding. Thats like asking them to spend $60 to get there since they are losing those wages. You should all sit down and talk about it and figure out who would really not be able to come and weigh the facts. In the end its up to the two of them and you should be there to support.
2007-01-09 15:30:31 · answer #4 · answered by Tamra 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I would just make it a point to let her know personnally that what ever decision she and your son makes, is fine with you. And that if there is anyway that you can help, you would be more than glad to. Trust me I'm getting married soon, when there is drama like this there is nothing better than a call from a concerned family member reassuring me that what ever the decision they have my back. I hope this helps.
2007-01-09 15:42:00 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
You remain calm and maybe she can see that you are calm and that will help her out. As far as when they want to get married, it is the choice and I know that one of my friends son got married on a Friday and they had a huge turn out and everything fell into place. Just say to her, if you need any help, please contact me, I will help you out in any wya i can. Good luck and tell the couple Congrats and Good Luck.. :D
2007-01-09 15:51:41 · answer #6 · answered by laurieprentice 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is their wedding and their relationshp and it is their decision. It is not your place to get involved whenever they have a problem. Unless they specifically ask you for your opinion, don't offer an opinion and, by the way, telling you the situation is not the same thing as aksing for your advice/opinion
2007-01-09 15:21:11 · answer #7 · answered by angihorn2006 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stay out of it and let your future daughter-in-law handle her step-Mom.
2007-01-09 15:24:29 · answer #8 · answered by KL 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are being cool, stay out of it, let her handle her step mom
2007-01-09 15:20:36 · answer #9 · answered by stringhead3 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Stay calm and neutral.
2007-01-09 15:21:08 · answer #10 · answered by Vesna G 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋