way and had the initial meeting and were interested in a dating this person or at least having a second date, and considering the fact that you live 35 miles from this woman and she didn't have a car or even if she did, would you drive to her home to pick her up to go out to dinner or would you expect her to drive half way and meet you? I am talking to a guy with this attitude and I am trying to break some sense into him to change his attitude if he wants to meet someone. I think a gentlemen picks his date up and doesnt' expect her to meet halfway (without it was a long distance, which might be understandable). I say leave the meeting have way for the married men who are having affairs are sneaking around. Am I wrong to believe a guy should come to his date rather than meet halfway?
2007-01-09 06:26:21 · 27 answers · asked by reallyfedup 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
this isn't a safety issue as I am cautious. This guy is not trying to be cautious he is just not willing to drive into the city to date anyone. I can understand meeting half way for safety but he isn't trying to be safe or he would meet me at the place I suggested which is near where I live and no where near wherever he lives. He just doens't want to put any effort into dating.
2007-01-09 06:39:17 · update #1
I am willing to meet him halfway somewhere I can get to (I don't drive so I have to take 2 or 3 buses to get to where he would consider meeting) but he doesn't want to come into the city as he hates it and seems to have an attitude towards anyone who lives here. If one person is driving and the other is taking the bus , I think the meeting place should be accomadating to the person who has to take 3 buses to get there.
2007-01-09 06:43:11 · update #2
Sadly, the truth is this: if he's interested in you, he'll drive the 35 miles since you don't have a car. If he's not really interested in you (yet!), then he won't feel that the bother is worth it. I'm sorry.
I would not expect a woman who does not have a car to meet me halfway if the distance between us is 35 miles.
2007-01-10 00:11:12 · answer #1 · answered by AnOrdinaryGuy 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well if she doesn't have a car and he is really interested in her then he would have no problems picking her up. On the other hand if sees that it's a huge thing for him to go all the way out of his way to go to her then he shouldn't even bother getting to know her.
I have a friend who drives up to his gf's 3 times a week and she's 40 miles away and sometimes he calls her to tell her he's tired and won't be visiting her and she gets pissed but yet she does drive and refuses to put an effort into driving 1/2 way or all the way to his house once in awhile, how fair is that?
2007-01-09 06:33:00 · answer #2 · answered by cutiepie81289 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If y'all have never met, I think it's fair for him to want to meet halfway (definitely not come to her home if they are virtual strangers)...after that, if a dating relationship begins, there should be some balance/equality in him picking her up and her at least meeting him part or all the way...
People have busy lives and although 35 miles isn't a huge distance, that's a 70 mile round trip and if you live in a city could be a couple of hours drive.
I'm a woman and I think it would be selfish for a woman to assume he should ALWAYS come pick her up and drop her off.
2007-01-09 06:31:17 · answer #3 · answered by . 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I live in Wyoming which is very rural. Everyone is 4 hours away lol. I have met many men on-line and yes I believe they should come to me on the first meeting. If they are truly interested it shouldn't be such a big deal. Any man worth my time will come to me on the first meeting. After that it's up for negotiation. I've traveled 7 hours for a second date, and had a blast and am still friends with that man. Stick to your guns on this. If he's any kind of gentleman he'll come to you.
2007-01-09 06:42:01 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's nice if a guy comes to pick up his date.
But sometimes meeting halfway isn't used to sneak around; sometimes it's a way of saying you don't expect all of the pressure of a date to fall on the guy.
2007-01-09 06:33:46 · answer #5 · answered by Chiquita B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well in my opinion (as a woman) it is not wrong at all for him to ask you to meet him halfway. I live pretty far out from everything in the suburbs, I have no problem meeting halfway the first even 3 dates, infact I prefer to especially if I am meeting from online you dont want him to know where you live anyhow!
Now if he asks you to pick him up, thats a problem lol.
2007-01-09 06:33:24 · answer #6 · answered by cincy_beautie 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You're gonna tell some guy that you have never met before to come to your HOUSE to pick you up? He's probably asking to meet halfway just because he wants to meet in a neutral place himself before taking that next step.
In general, I think for a first date it is perfectly acceptable to "meet" rather than have the guy pick you up, especially in this case when it is kind of a blind-date scenario...a car ride together could be awkward because talking to people online can be totally different from talking to them in person, plus, you have no idea if you can trust this guy -- really.
2007-01-09 06:33:38 · answer #7 · answered by intothelight 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I disagree on a simple issue of safety. Until a woman gets to know a man, particularly a stranger from the Internet or a bar pickup, she should not disclose her home location. She drives 1/2 way to meet him.
2007-01-09 06:31:03 · answer #8 · answered by kja63 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
The guy should pick the female up, no matter how far she lives, BUT the female should sometimes offer to meet half way. It's called being nice and it may turn him on in the process.
2007-01-09 06:37:38 · answer #9 · answered by Baby 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ummm...i've never met any of my online friends but most of them are hours away and in that situation I would try and meet them halfway. But if it's only 35 miles away I would expect him to pick you up especially if it's a date. I mean if he knows you don't have a car and he has one why not pick you up. Maybe there's another reason he won't drive to see you. Try and talk to him and see why he won't pick you up or if he's just being unreasonable.
2007-01-09 06:33:58 · answer #10 · answered by angelicasongs 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋