Why can't I just bring myself to go?

6 ⤊

Why can't I just bring myself to go?

I'm in college, I've been struggling since September to be successful and to get my work done. I switched from one program to another because it was more slow paced. I started two months behind the rest. Now it's January, I haven't gone to class in such a long time. The program I'm in is independent learning, but there are certain days where I have to go.

Anyway, I've been battling with depression for years. It always ruins everything. I have a counselor now at the college which I haven't seen in a while, but If I don't care enough to get out of bed, or to eat, then why would I care about class. No one really understands. I sit here dressed and ready to get to class. Yet I can't bring myself to do it. I've built all these fears, from putting class off for so long. If I fail 1.5 credit classes I lose my funding by my sponsor, and I'll never get it again. I feel like such a spoiled brat, government gives me money to go to college yet I abuse it. I feel as if I'm destined for failure.

2007-01-09 04:45:36 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Mental Health

I'm in no way ungrateful of the money that I receive for my education. It's just everyone around me not wanting me to lose my funding. Its all everyone worries about, "Don't lose your funding, you'll never get it back" Blah! why can't I just suck it up and go.

2007-01-09 04:48:30 · update #1

I'm not on any medication. I think I do have anxiety. I've never had counseling before. I've never dealt with any of my problems from the past, such as rape and molestation. It's just I feel like a brat again, making or finding excuses for being nothing more than a failure.

2007-01-09 05:02:07 · update #2

18 answers

PLEASE don't be so hard on yourself. Depression is a sickness, just like the flu. I hope you wouldn't be so pissed off at yourself for missing class because you caught the flu.

It sounds like your depression needs some care right now. I know it's hard to get out of bed or care to get out of bed (trust me, I really do know), but the greatest gift you could give yourself right now would be to go back to that counselor and get a referral to a dr. or psychiatrist that might be able to prescribe you some medication. If the thought of medication bothers you, please go back to the flu metaphor. Most people wouldn't have a problem taking medication for the flu if it would help them feel better and give them their "normal" functioning level back faster.

The most successful way to treat depression is through both medication and cognitive therapy. Please try both. And also know, sometimes it takes awhile to find the right medication. Don't give up if the first or even the second don't work correctly for you. Medication for depression is a very individualized thing.

Take care of yourself and give yourself some grace. You are not a spoiled brat.

Good luck

2007-01-09 04:53:21 · answer #1 · answered by P_P_K 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋

2007-01-09 04:49:51 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 4⤋

It would make the most sense for you to get into treatment as soon as possible. Depression will steal life from you. I've messed up college so many times...and learned from it that the most important thing I should have done was WITHDRAW from classes until I was able to manage going. You should be able to get a medical leave...to temporarily take off of school, without losing your funding. But if you don't go through the proper channels and do this, you will very likely have found you've created a mess for yourself. I learned this the hard way.

If you have this trauma in your past and depression for years, why on earth haven't you seen a mental health professional? In any case, what's done is done, so you need to take it from here.
If I were you, I would talk to the college counselor and ask her/him to refer you to a therapist. This is really serious, but there is help and hope.

I totally understand not being able to just bring yourself to go and do what needs to be done. I think anyone who has struggled with depression has.

2007-01-09 08:37:47 · answer #3 · answered by Jess 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋

Get help now! I had the EXACT same experience when I attend college. Unfortunately, I did not know that I was depressed and just kept losing one class after another. I still have the same issues today. Was on medication for a time, worked very well but work insurance changed and was no longer covered for the expensive prescription. I tell you now, seek professional help if at all possible. depression is one of the most misunderstood conditions out there. Don't take it lightly. My life has been complete disappointment and chaos since I got off of the medication. Takes a lot to overcome your symptoms, but as stated before, the fact that you have become aware is the first step to overall wellness.

2007-01-09 05:03:44 · answer #4 · answered by big mal 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋

If you cannot make yourself go any longer, then seek help, and since you have been having this problem for years it would be wise to do so. Now would be a good time. People have problems and they can't help it. Others will never understand what your going through until they are walking in your shoes. I wouldn't be so down on myself. I had a similiar experience, my parents paid for me to go to college doing something I didn't want to do. I went everyday in the same type of depression like you mentioned, because I knew otherwise I would be more depressed and they would hate me. I never talked to anyone or did anything other than sit there moping. If I could redo it, I would have taken meds and straightened up. If you can, make yourself keep going on. Your not a brat, you have issues. Get you some meds and you'll feel better. First you got to want to help yourself though, remember that.

2007-01-09 04:53:28 · answer #5 · answered by christinedaae 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋

Been there. Sounds like you're having a significant depressive episode with anxiety. Your medication dosage of type may not be sufficient to deal with it. Talk to your counsellor and doctor. The definition of dysfuntional is when the problem starts adversely impacting your life. You have a problem that needs treatment - now. If you wait another week, you'll be deeper behind. Do it now.

Another suggestion - avoid independent study courses. They are absolutely the wrong format for depressive people for exactly the reasons you've cited. Also, hook up with another bright student in the class and arrange for notes exchange. It works well if both partners take good notes and try to get to class every day. It also attaches you to another person.

But really - get to the doctor today (even the ER if that's the only way of getting medical help quickly) and talk to your counsellor today.

Hope it goes better for you.

2007-01-09 04:54:16 · answer #6 · answered by cwilliscroft 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋

I read your biography. It sounds like you are a really good, level headed person, who is just fighting depression. I so understand because I am fighting it too. It's takes a lot of effort just to clean my house and I can't imagine having to take classes right now.

However, you have to pull yourself together enough to get out the door and head to class. Don't you usually feel better once you busy yourself and get there? Don't lose your funding because it's a great opportunity for you to do whatever you want to do with your life in the future. You have goals. Think about your goals and how you can achieve them. Join some positive groups at your college and hang out with positive people, who are uplifting.

Perhaps make an appointment with your doctor, who can help you with your depression.

Now get off the computer and just go to class!

2007-01-09 05:02:13 · answer #7 · answered by Michelle 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋

It's your health that is the most important issue. Tell your friends that you really don't need their opinions, so please stop! Seek a psychologist, my dear! You are not a spoiled brat! Right now you have no control over your depression. It's a physiological state that you're in. Your doctor can help you, by talking with you, and putting you on meds to control your depression (been there.) Don't blame yourself, just get yourself some help! Take care, and take it slow.

2007-01-09 05:00:43 · answer #8 · answered by Bud's Girl 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋

Pull up your bootstraps and get yourself to your counselor about this problem. He or she is better equipped to help you out of this slump or depression. Right now it sounds like depression has a firm grip on you.

Please know there is a way out of it but it really sounds like you need some outside help. It takes a brave person to admit it. I've been there and done just that. (things had gotten so out of hand I checked myself into the hospital for help. It was probable one of the best things I could have done. I learned some coping skills and a lot of other stuff that was very helpful and my case did require taking antidepressants for awhile. AND I am very much alive. Had I not done this I wouldn't be here today.)

Hang in there and know there are people who care about you and want to see you succeed in life.

Please go see your counselor at college if nothing else just to see what he/she has to say.

Oh, and people who do go to psychiatrist or therapist or check themselves into the hospital for help ARE NOT pshyco, they are people who have realized they need serious help before something serious happens. So don't listen to any of that crap.

2007-01-09 05:06:51 · answer #9 · answered by Dana H 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋

You need to withdrawl now if you don't go to class. You're wasting money, even government money.

While depression is huge, you're admitting to it. That's the first step.

Your first step should be to see your counselor.

Ask yourself: why did I once care about classes? A future? To feel successful? Why?

But first go to the counselor. This sounds less like depression and more like a case of scared of failing.

2007-01-09 04:49:56 · answer #10 · answered by FaZizzle 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋