I have been with my boyfriend for 2 and a half years. i'm 25 and he's 27. at first we were doing awesome, he always wanted to go do things, he was always at my house...ect.. the past few months prob since July. He doesn't want to come out to my house anymore, he always wants to stay home and hang out with his 2 friends (that are guys). and when he does go anywhere anymore. it's to the bar to shoot pool. There is this 22yr old girl that is a MAJOR hoe bag. she has slept with 3 different guys in one weekend, plus likes to wait untill this married guy gets drunk so she can take advatage of it. Well she had surgery done last week, she asked my bf to take her some pain medication and he did.. this was at 2am. He never told me about it, I found out on my own. He says they are just friends and if I can't deal with it then tough. He knows I don't trust her at all.. but it seems like he doesn't care.. Now if a male friend of mine was to do what he did, he would get really mad.
2007-01-09 04:40:35 · 15 answers · asked by Jen 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I love my bf to death, and I want it to work out. and he tells me all the time that he feels the same.. but sometimes idk what to think anymore. he hid this from me cause he thought it wasn't important so now I think.. what eles is he hidding from me.
2007-01-09 04:41:41 · update #1
It seems like he needs some space in the relationship, because to be honest, he may not be interested in you anymore. Just from the way you wrote your story, I get the feeling that this guy feels like the relationship is boring or he is looking for someone else. The fact that he didn't tell you anything about this little instance you mentioned says that he wants more independence and feels like he should be able to do things without your opinion or knowledge. It also shows that he doesn't respect your feelings, especially since he knows you don't like this girl. I think you should have a serious discussion with him about the status of your relationship and his true feelings about you. Look into his eyes when you talk to him. If he can't look into your eyes, something is wrong.
Another option is to start spicing up the relationship big time. This will take a lot of effort on your part, but just start rekindling the relationship by doing new and exciting things with him that will bring back the romance. If you don't compete with the hoe bag, you may lose. Some guys just don't know how good they have it, it may be that he doesn't have a lot of sense.
2007-01-09 04:56:50 · answer #1 · answered by CPDawg 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I it hard when you two have been together for so long, you love him and want to make it work, yet he is being distant. It is normal for the woman to be more emotionally involved
Many times for men after a year or longer they get bored, especially if he wasn't viewing your relationship with the view of getting married - after the same routine - some new girl sparks his interest.
FOR the length of your relationship - there is NO excuse for his behavior - first and foremost you need be honest in a relationship, and once that starts to go you have trust issues that typically tear a relationship further apart
You need to be honest with him about your feelings and concerns - he should respect and listen and RESPOND you what you have to say -
His response will be 1 of the 3
1) If his response for your feeling are brushed off or he acts like he doesn't care then he has already started to loose interest in you
2) If there is nothing going on and he cares of his relationship working he will take the time to listen and communicate back as to why he been acting differently
3) If he doesn't really seem responsive he is on the fence - he still cares for you, but at the same time feel there is something lacking and isn't sure what he wants
IF you feel there is some hope then fins ways to do little things to spark his interest, spice up your love life, make things exciting, so he can fall in love with you all over again.
On a personal not don’t waste dating men for so long if it doesn’t go anywhere – having a boyfriend is over rated you should have friends, date, but to be tied down for 2 + years and still NOT know where your relationship is headed is such a waste of time, when you can be meeting other people.
Good Luck
D
2007-01-09 05:05:19 · answer #2 · answered by Dianna R 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I get the feeling that he really wouldn't care if a guy came to visit you at 2am. Obviously, I don't know what is going on entirely in your relationship...but if he doesn't want to come out to your house anymore...always wanting to hang out with the guys...goes to the bar to shoot pool...takes "medication" to the "major hoe bag," I have to wonder if he is just not interested continuing a relationship with you. I would cool it off and not bother calling or going over to his place...just to see if he starts wondering where I was or what I was up to. If he doesn't check in within a couple of weeks...I would get the message. If he comes around after that and asks about why I haven't been around...I would definitely point out the reasons why I didn't think he was that 'into me.'
2007-01-09 04:50:14 · answer #3 · answered by What, what, what?? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well you already know what to do... you just want a second appinion huh?.. you said yourself that "i am madly in love" with your bf!! hello.. you in love with the guy you're with. so stay with him of course.. never take advantage of what you have.. its always better to keep what you know you have then to exchange it for a mystery box.. if you know what i mean.. you never now what will happen if you go with another guy and if you do you will ruin what you have now.. you lovehim stay with him.. your ex crush. is just that.. your EX crush ok.. plus he had the nerve to say he hated you.. thats harsh .. and im sure with a statement like that he surely doesnt love you more then the girl he is with.. or that would never came out his mouth.. he just might be getting bored with his girl. and want to change.. and because of the past he believes you still like him... and he thinks you are a sure thing.. so prove him wrong and tell him no.. that you dont like him anymore.. and that your in love already with a great man. cause he must be if you love him.. and this entire time you have had a great friend thats a boy and he thought he could be more then friends.. and has been trying to while you thought you jsut friends.. so wht you need to do is be sure to clarify with him that you two will only be friends.. and that you adore his friendship and love him as a brother.. and that you can never be more then friends.. he needs to know this so he can move on and try to get a girl that will actualy love him back... even after you tell him this he will still think he has a chance with you for a while.. but hopefully he will come to understand shortly... goodluck and i hope it all works out for you.. dr icebreaker
2016-05-22 23:05:41 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl, you are in denial. This relationship is not what you want or need. No guy who is just friends with a girl takes meds to her at 2 in the morning. After all can you really get serious meds that time of night? Plus, at the point a guy tells you to just deal with the fact he is basically telling you to either choose him and this relationship on his terms or leave. If he loved you he would be wanting a relationship on your terms. Stop denying the truth, which is that he likes having you around when he feels like it and that is it.
2007-01-09 04:48:28 · answer #5 · answered by rkrell 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
You need to break up with him and move on. He proably had sex with her and might be still doing doing it. If he doesn't want to come over and be with you anymore and rather hang out with his friends then you need to dump him and find someone better. That's kind of late to be paying a friend a visit. Just do yourself a favor and get out of that relationship. It seems like he has already.
2007-01-09 04:47:28 · answer #6 · answered by Irish Girl 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
that's not that major I'll be mad to but hey he just took her medicine nothing happened just forget about it until you hear different. he's yo man and he's with you so forget her just explain to him hoe you feel and that if you would of done what he did he would have a fit. you know how man think things are completely different for them.
2007-01-09 04:48:52 · answer #7 · answered by Mz.Tweety 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is all about trust, obviously. If you can convey to him that your trust is shaken when he sees her or talks to her, and he continues to do so, then he is not listening to you and what is important to you. I think your concern is a valid one, personally, and if he chooses to ignore your request, then I think you have a better understanding of where the relationship might be heading.
2007-01-09 04:47:48 · answer #8 · answered by randyken 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
If it smells, scratches and barks like a dog then it is a dog! Go with your gut on this one, you know exactly what it's telling you and it's right! Time to move on I'm afraid.
2007-01-09 04:46:14 · answer #9 · answered by perkadittle 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Phone the girl and ask her if she slept with him, then you will have an answer.
If you don't trust your guy, you shouldn't be with him.
If he cheated and lied then you can deal with that.
You will drive yourself crazy with this. Call her and get it over with.
2007-01-09 04:46:09 · answer #10 · answered by doclakewrite 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋