2007-01-09 03:10:13 · 17 answers · asked by virgin52 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Thank you for respnses..Hawaii 200, most helpful. We are not married, engaged recently, sex has dropped off significantly, I feel like I am competing with girls on comp. I am older woman, no longer 20..., probably this is just a self esteem issue. However, I am pysically qttractive still, and take care of myself, good sense of humor also. He says he is just curious, but at 43, he ought to know what this looks like by now. I liken it to voyeruism, and just feel its insulting to me. He promised when we got this computer he wouldnt do this, didn't figure i'd be smart enough to find out. The lying bothers me alot too. Not the first time. Thanks for intelligent responses.
2007-01-11 04:16:13 · update #1
Not all men look at porn. He has an addiction, its a problem that needs to be taken care soon. Its like an alcoholic, they don't they have a problem. He probably doesnt think there is anything wrong with it but there is. There is nothing wrong with you its HIM! you need to confront him, you need to either get rid of the internet, do whatever possible to stop him, its ruining your relationship, and if he gets upset, just ignore him. some people believe that looking at porn is ok, but its not. When you are in a relationship why would u need porn. Porn is for losers who can't get any from other people. Or who lack self esteem. Do someting about it before its too late.
2007-01-09 03:19:09 · answer #1 · answered by cib0385 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your question is very difficult to answer because it lacks information. Are you married? Just dating? How often do you have sex? These, and more, are very important factors.
I can tell you this though:
#1) Men masturbating to porn is completely natural and healthy and it has absolutely nothing at ALL to do with the man's wife or girlfriend. I would be more worried if he wasn't looking at porn. You can find lots of information on the net that teaches how healthy masturbation fantasies are to both men and women.
#2) His lying to you about it however, is not healthy. He is either embarrassed, or is trying not to hurt your feelings. Again, I don't have enough information to accurately answer this question. I can only guess.
#3) My wife knows I do it, and she thinks it's good because it provides me with a fantasy outlet, and never involves another real woman. My desire for sex is easily 5 times stronger than my wife's. She cannot keep up. (Even if she could, I would still look at porn. Men look at porn.)
2007-01-09 03:29:18 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The fact your man looks at porn is not really a reflection on you. The brain is the largest sex organ we have. Some people need more stimulation than others. Porn provides us with a source of that stimuli. It's all about fantasy.Porn isn't real ,it is designed to entertain. As long as your man isn't going to other women for what he feels he needs,I wouldn't worry. The best thing you can do is share his fantasies,perhaps even live some of them out. You may learn to enjoy him even more than you do now.
2007-01-09 03:19:36 · answer #3 · answered by mopjky 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
men are much more visual than women. there is absolutely nothing wrong with you, girl! It is perfectly natural to feel a bit insulted but don't be. Talk with your guy about it and ask him why he looks at porn. If his answer bothers you than you need to consider your relationship. Weigh the good and the bad about him and the relationship and make a decision to stay in the relationship or get out. There are more guys out there -- no reason to stay in a relationship that you are unhappy or uncomfortable being in! Good luck to you :)
2007-01-09 03:18:15 · answer #4 · answered by rachie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first he should not have to lie about this
second there is nothing wrong with you
third men are visually stimulated
fourth we are constantly curious about other females we don't get
in a relationship and just suddenly forget what we found attractive
about the opposite sex
fifth he probably would soon get bored with it if you didn't make a fuss
or feel he was visually cheating on you that almost sounds as stupid
as he is raping me with his eyes OK get over it enjoy the fact he will
probably get turned on by images and then go to bed with you
don't you ever romanticize or fantasize
2007-01-09 03:26:19 · answer #5 · answered by oddbs2 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with the last person. Guy's think about sex all the time. It's normal. They are very visual. If he's looking at porn but still treating you right and only having sex with you, I wouldn't worry about it. If he's looking at porn, treating you bad, and not having sex with you, there's a problem.
2007-01-09 03:19:25 · answer #6 · answered by freedove06 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is nothing wrong with you, You may be the most beautiful sexy woman in the world and it won't matter to an addict. He is as hooked as if he were doing heroin. The only way to break the addiction is to get psychological help. If he won't get it then you need to see someone to try to help you cope, if you plan to stay with him i mean.
2007-01-09 03:24:53 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
first of all, theres nothing wrong with you. there are a lot of reasons guys look at internet - mainly because they're horn dogs! :)
if it bothers you that much, then sit down and talk to him about it without yelling at him. it really bothered me that my guy had some even though he didn't look at it that much, but when i talked to him about it and told him how it made me feel, he got rid of all of it and hasn't look at it since.
if he keeps lying to you, that should be a red flag. are you sure that's the only thing he's lying about? just be careful because once he sees how easy it is to lie about one thing, it'll be easier to lie about another!
2007-01-09 03:16:30 · answer #8 · answered by john_deeregirl07 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
After you know he has looked at internet porn, attack him and see if your sex life is better. As long as he is at home checking out the internet, you know he isn't outside with someone esle. Check out the internet porn for yourself, with him. Let him know, you want to see what it's all about with him.
2007-01-09 03:53:39 · answer #9 · answered by pysmith429 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Internet porn is nothing to be ashamed of...for me... I really think it's no deal.
It's normal for guys to look at...
Guys lie to these things cuz they see that you'll get upset. If not, or if you could enjoy with him, he won't lie...I think...
Tell him "What is your fantasy? I want to know! Let me look at the porns you've been watching on internet, so I could maybe make your dream come true..?"
2007-01-09 03:14:42 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋