What should I do if my boyfriend is attracted to another girl and visits her instead of me?

Question

My boyfriend roommate and his girlfriend tired to hook him up with her roommate. Her roommate had a crush on him and after knowing that he slept in the same bed as her while visiting her one weekend. After that he was texting and calling her, also he was visiting her more on the weekends instead of me. He realized she was annoying and didn't want to hangout with her, but worst is he wasn't ever going to tell me this until i found out from someone else. We've been going out for 3years now and paractically lived together till he transfered to another school for his major. I don't know if I can ever trust him again now, and we were talking about marriage before he left. What should I do?

Answer 1

First I am going to say sorry.
There are 2 things you can do...
If you Love him alot... you can stay with him but things will change. Like you said you dont know if you can trust him again. He would have to re earn it. It is something possible to get threw, but in a way you have to start over. If you think he is worth it and if he really makes u happy you can do it. And if he is also willing to earn it again. Also to add to that keep your guard up.

The other thing you can do
Is the break up with him. Because if he cared for you he would have never done it. The other thing is if he had done it he would have told you, if though it is something you dont want to her it is better than finding out from a friend. I cant stand cheating it literary will break my heart when it happens...But i tell the ppl i care about a lot, is tell me if they did. And if they want me back after it, I tell them to tell me asap. And i would look at that when i decide what to do.Because lets face it everyone makes mistakes, but that doesnt mean cheating is okay it just show the amount they care about u if they do that. But of course you wont trust them again for a while.
I hope this helps...and if it doesnt make sense I am sorry i will try and explain it better. I have very poor writing skills and i want to appolize for them...
And Lastly
DO WHAT U THINK FEELS RIGHT NOW NOT WHAT DID AND WHAT WILL. AND IF U DO TAKE HIM BACK BE ALERT u dont have to forever but till u feel u can.AND IF U DONT TAKE HIM BACK think of it like this you better than that...and its his lose not yours. DONT LOOK BACK...

Answer 2

If he just saw her as a friend then he wouldnt be lying to you about not texting her and lack of texting, instead he would be upfront with you. Being a friend with another girl is not some big deal, certainly not something to lie to your girlfriend about either. He does have a very emotional connection with her, he feels like he can confide almost anything to her. Emotional connections are 100x more dangerous and powerful then a sexual attraction, the lesser of two evils is having a sexual hookup while in a relationship, emotional affairs are far worse. This misery, stress and lack of trust is just not worth it, you need to cut your losses and move on with your life and forget all about him. Trust me on this, you'll feel much more relieved that you don't have to deal with all this drama and tension on a daily basis.

Answer 3

Im truly sorry to hear this. Im sure it must be a really hard time for you. If you think he's worth it. Confront him and it's best to meet up with him and have a good one on one talk. Try to understand each other's need and le thim know how u truly feels. some gf might have just gone berserk. Hang in there if u must. however, if things doesnt look promising. Let go and start afresh. You'll do fine and he'll realise someday how good you've been and what he had been missing.

Answer 4

You dump him thats what you do!!! Why would you eben be thinking about getting married with someone that will leave you behind to hang out with a women he finds more attractive. His not the guy for you. Don't be dumb and stay with him cause later on you'll be stuck with a kid as a single parent. Plus he wasen't even going to tell you about it. I wonder what other things he keeps from you.

Answer 5

He is a college boy and really should not be tied down - he needs to have fun in college and sow his wild oats. However, he should have been honest with you and told you that he needed his space before he began fooling around. I know it hurts but you need to let him go, get his education and grow up. People and feelings change and I am truly sorry you have been hurt.

Answer 6

3 years is a long time and if he has done this to you now after every think that you both have been through together then i will let him go and you go and find someone else, i know that sounds harsh but really you dont want some1 like him in your life that doesnt really know what he wants.

Answer 7

I'd dump him. Sounds like you got a cheater. If the girl wasn't annoying, I'm sure he would have slept with her.

Answer 8

You should leave this relationship. He can't be trusted. He withheld important information from you. It would be difficult for me to trust this person again. I'd leave. He's her problem now. Find a guy who will not break your trust.

Answer 9

it sound lke you need to talk to him about what really going on.
if he intertested in someone else, time to get everything out
in the open, you deserve honestly if nothing else after three
years with him. especially since you are talking marriage.
something up.......

Answer 10

Tough one girl. I say give him a chance. But befor you do, confront him and confront him good!!!! If he really apoligize, then give him a chance. If not, forget him. If not, you can start flirting with your toher guy friends.