unfortunately I m in luv with a guy rt now…. He luvs me very much. We love each other very much… My family members are very strict they really wont allow me to get marry the one whom I luv,… even though my family members agrees my relatives will not… they are found of caste n we both are from different caste…some of his relatives are telling his mom (Bfrnds mom) will agree 4 ur luv marriage,,, u need not worry but if ur parents are not whiling u people to get marry then u shld come with him like that… how can I go with him leaving my parents n my mom she luvs me very much I luv both of them my mom n him what to do… I dotn want to hurt both of them yar…n if I go with him how the society will treat my parents… i don’t even know how I fallen in luv with him… I m wondering but I luv him truly I dont want to loose him too…. sure my mom will not object but at the same time she will not agree because of my relatives…. What shld I do…. (I finished my graduation n working rt now)…
2007-01-08 16:50:48 · 23 answers · asked by Janu 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
LOOK when you get a certain age you can marry whom you like
2007-01-08 16:54:42 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Look dear, the question u r facing am facing the same except that i and my G.F. had a big time fight and now i have already said sorry tons of time and it seems now again might things go right between us but....i love her a lot...i feel so...like you still am confused...but than dear friend parents are parents....my family is very conservative only when it comes to religion otherwise they are very broad minded....my G.F is also from other caste...i know if i get adamant no body can stop me but than those people who loved us throughout are life without a inch of selfishness..how can we hurt them....i realised it while going thru the relationship that if we dont go according to are G.F. or B.F or if coz of some other reason say anything harsh to them they may even b ready to break the relationship but our parents...whtever u do and how much u hurt them they will always b with u....and honey u need their blessing to b successful in any shpere of life...am not asking you to get out of the relationship....try to make ur parents understand you...am sure they will..if the guy is really good they will consider it...look am not sure that if my relationship will ever again work or not...but i really wish ur realtionship work and urs and ur B.F.'s parents blessings are their with u...rest u r the best person to priproties relations in ur life....my case and ur case cant b the same so looking at my case giving u suggestion wht to do wont b absoluely appropriate...All the BEST....
2007-01-08 17:12:07 · answer #2 · answered by Friend 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well
U hv a serious problem my dear,but if u look at it the way i am,there wont be a prob.I can understand how u r feeling now.But i dont think u hv 2 choose between ur Mom & Bf.Relax !!sit back & talk about it with ur Mom,say u dont wanna loose any1 of them,im sure she will understand.Relatives will talk till ur marriage & then there wont be a prob.
So what if he is from another religion?(maybe he is Muslim & u r Hindu)if ur love is true then there's noprob!
on other hand,if he is agree then u can go away & get married,if u wanna so..............but i dont think that will be a good choise as both of u'll loose ur family & whats life without FAMILY??
(I think u r Indian,thats y gave I E on that cast)
God bless ya
2007-01-09 18:23:21 · answer #3 · answered by miss_rimi1989 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Despite all the advice...only you are the one to take the decision. What if you talk to your mom about this and how serious this matter is for you and how you feel that marrying anyone else will be cheating the 'other' person. You can give her two options - for you not to marry anybody and for you to marry the one you love. May be with time and determination, the opposition in the family subsides and you may get to marry anybody you want, just so that you get married. But this may take a long long time. Easier way out is to get married in Arya Samaj Mandir and live away from the city but then you will have to work equally hard to get your family together and convince them that you didn't want to hurt them but it was a matter of life and death for you.
2007-01-09 01:04:46 · answer #4 · answered by Smriti 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
TALK 2 UR PARENTS!! thats the only way out. I understand that u respect ur parents very much so u should talk to them and tell them how u feel. At the end of the day, they are ur parents and want whats best for you. If u truly love this guy, then stand up for love and plz dont elope and insult ur love and ur parents. Be proud of ur love and dont hide it n wait till u r arranged 2 someone. IMPORTANT: Also tell ur parents that u r willing to wait for their approval no matter how long it takes. This shows them that u value their feelings and wouldn't go against their wishes. Finally they will come to understand ur love n will give u green flag. I know it sounds crazy but believe me it will work.
2007-01-09 15:09:39 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Really a very difficult situation.
U want both.. Ur love and ur family..
If anyone overrides the other in your mind then it would have been a simple solution,.
The solution to this problem is, just have some courage and tell the truth to your mom. She is the only person who can help you and can protect you from your relatives and father if she agrees to your love.
Have courage...
2007-01-09 04:25:02 · answer #6 · answered by Sandeep G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is hard because I am a mother myself...but for true happiness, you just have to worry about yourself. You are the only person who can make you happy and make the choices you need to make for yourself. Where do you come from? Do you have the freedom to make the choice to be with this person, or do you live in a country that bases it's lively hood on traditions? I wish I could help you out more, just follow your instincts. You know the answer, truthfully, better than anyone. I wish you well.
2007-01-08 16:59:32 · answer #7 · answered by momofatsc 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look dear Janu, I have an idea.
Tell ur mom about ur love and let u people act infront of ur relatives as a arranged marriage. Got my point. Only u, ur mom, and the guys parents will knowits love marriage. I think u can understand my idea.
Good luck.
2007-01-09 00:14:59 · answer #8 · answered by Meera 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know it is hard but I do think that you will have to walk away from your parents and relations. They married who they wanted, they led the life they wanted. Now, you must do the same. You will outlive your parents and relations I hope so you must shape your future the way you want it.
If you have to elope, then do so. Maybe in years to come, they will come round, if they do, great, if not, keep living yur life with the man you truly love.
2007-01-09 05:10:11 · answer #9 · answered by rockandrollrev 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are adults nobody can stop you from marrying, but keep in mind that parents always look for the best match for their daughter. If you go against their wishes, you may loose parents forever. Better you take them in confidence and don't go blind in love, as such love marriages usually fail in the last.
2007-01-08 17:02:18 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not worry what your family believes, it is their belief and it is not true. You look after your happiness, and do not worry, everything will fall into place, because everyone are doing just that, they are looking after their own happiness. don't go with the boy just like that, marry properly, get registered in the court. It is love marriages that have the maximum divorce rate.
2007-01-08 21:40:25 · answer #11 · answered by wizard of the East 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋