I don't know why it is so difficult to tell the girls to live their own lives, but I am having a hard time with it. One of the girls asked me to get an aparment with her. She said that I could pay the bills for the first few months until she got a job, but I don't think she will ever go to work or help me pay the bills. My wife will surely divorce me if I move in with her.
So, my question is this, what words do I use to tell the girls that I am finished supporting them? They need jobs and they need to pay their own bills. I am done. I want my wife and little girl back and I can't have them and continue taking care of my grown children too. My wife demanded that I pay her back every dime that I spent on the girls. She figures that I spent about $22,000 of her money. I think it was more.
Again, the question is, what words do I use to tell the girls to get a life-- not my life, but a life of their own?
2007-01-08 13:11:59 · 2 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
This is about building boundaries in your life. For whatever reason, you're allowing your adult children to influence the quality of your life and your ability to care for and emotionally support your wife and younger child.
You need to tell your adult children it's time for them to live independently of your financial support. If they're working, then great. If not? Then they need to get a job. Will this be easy? No. Will they play on your sympathies and make you feel guilty? Only if you let them.
Take a stand for the wife and daughter... I'm sure they'll appreciate it
2007-01-08 13:19:07 · answer #1 · answered by Amy S 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell them that you love them so very much but it is time for them to grow up.You can not support them forever. You have a wife and a child not grown that need you and you need them.You were there for them when they were little girls and you want to be there for your other girl.They will be fine on their own.
2007-01-08 13:21:03 · answer #2 · answered by Fly Boy 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋