been dating tom for almost 6mons.right before i met him he broke-up with his gf.they have been dating on and off for the last 15 yrs(he left his wife for her).he has kep in touch with her since they broke-up 7 mons ago but has told me they were just friends.well last night i found a 5 page love letter from her in his briefcase.it went something like this "what tom murphy means to me" then she had eash reason numbered #1.you told me i will allways be # 1 to you #2.i love the way you smile when u look at me...and this went on for 5 pages! i could tell by the way she was speaking she wrote this after they brokeup.when i asked my bf about it he just blewed it off and said oh that thing its been in there forever i just forgot to take it out.well maybe so but i sware it was not in there last week,plus it was right infront how could he "over look" a 5 page letter?my question is what is she up to wrighting something like that reminding him of all the things he has done/said to her?
2007-01-08 13:04:20 · 7 answers · asked by jennyhomes6578 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I dont know if you should be worried. he might have just not gotten around to it...to get rid of it. i mean it's only been a few months since they broke up. you need to talk to him and don't accuse him. ask him why he'd still have a letter from her?? but if he is keeping it on purpose just to look back and read it..then maybe you should question whether he is ready to be with you.
2007-01-08 13:09:20 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You already know what's going on. He's most likely been seeing her again. A 15 year habit is hard to break, but he should be man enough not to take you along for the ride. A 5 page love letter in his briefcase would be hard to overlook, that is certain. Even if it's old, it must have some lingering emotional significance to him or he would have tossed it by now (or at least relegated it to the memory box in the back of his closet). The chances that he is completely innocent of doing anything behind your back are slim to none. He is not ready to move on just yet, even though their relationship was probably turbulent. For your own sanity and self-worth, you need to remove yourself from this situation now. Tell him you can not see him anymore as long as this woman is still a part of his life. If they are really "just friends", he should be comfortable taking you with him when he sees her, getting together with her as a couple, and caring about you enough to help you know her as a friend, too. I don't think this is the case. You are not comfortable with her in his life, and this does NOT make you "psycho" or needlessly jealous. If he loves you, he will meet you on your terms and come after you, leaving his old baggage behind. If not, you are better off without him.
2007-01-08 13:21:26 · answer #2 · answered by roknrolr63 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WOW, i DON'T EVEN KNOW WHERE TO START. First off, go with your gut feeling. From your explanation, I think you pretty much know the answers to all your questions. Im not trying to be harsh, but I truely wouldn't trust him. Obviously is ex is not a girl he will ever forget. They were together for a long time. She will always have a thing for him, and he will always have a thing for her. That letter was in his briefcase because he wants it in there. He is going to lie up and down and all around. Please don't fall into his lil trap. He's probably debating on giving he another chance or coninuing a relationship with you. He's probably torn and is probably enjoying the best of both worlds. I would hold my foot down and get right down to the bottom of things. Don't let this situation go on longer than it already has. Good Luck!
2007-01-08 13:12:57 · answer #3 · answered by Noah's Mommy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Careful, I had a similar thing happen to me. I was going through my gf wallet cause she told me to take her cash out and deposit it in the bank, well I got a bit curious and found love notes in her wallet from her ex bf.
I told her flat out to make a decision now, either tell him you're done for sure or get out of my life. I said it a little bit meaner
She told him, then he kept trying to come around so I had to make a few threats. After that he has stayed away from her and me.
It amazes me to see what kind of an impact it had on him when i told him just what a .44 Magnum could do. ;)
2007-01-08 13:10:18 · answer #4 · answered by P345Ruger 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
BE worrying! BE VERY worrying! what's he doing with that throughout his breifcase??? Sounds to me like a clean letter that he replaced into hiding from you. If I have been on your shoes i could tell him on NO uncertain words can he proceed his "friendship" with this female. pondering the contents of the letter, this is not an unreasonable request. Secondly, i could actual call her and notice what she has to assert. tell her you got here across the letter and which you don't get exhilaration from her chasing your guy. Be arranged, whether, he would be giving her encouragement, or worse yet - seeing her on the section. stable success!
2016-10-30 09:36:22 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your intuition is telling you something...please listen. It sounds like he is not being honest. It sounds like she gets some response from him by writing this letter. I would suggest to cut him loose, take time to get over the emotional loss, and find someone who is honest.
2007-01-08 13:10:14 · answer #6 · answered by mazl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am not even going to read all that drama, if you are with him and you are finding letters from someone that isn't him. CAN HIM!
2007-01-08 13:10:03 · answer #7 · answered by doesitmatter 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋