What do you think when people say, "It's only a dog (cat)"?

Question

I was married for twelve years but had no children, but I had something BETTER than children. I had a lovable chihuahua that I loved more I ever loved my children, but as a condition for a non-contested divorce, he got custody of her. Since I had to move outside the US, I agreed to let him keep her.

Recently, I found out that my ex husband had to give my precious chihuahua away because he couldn't afford to take care of her. I'm most heartbroken and everyone I talk to is minimizing my pain, saying "It's only a dog". Frankly, I don't think I would feel any worse if I had lost one of my human children.

I know there are millions of people who love their pets and consider them an integral part of their family. Why is it that not everyone understands that kind of love?

Holly says, "But come on, you loved your dog more than you love your children? That is a little either too much love for the pet or not enough love for your children. "

It shouldn't be THAT hard to understand. Children are thoughtless, selfish, self-centered and only think about themselves most of the time. They talk back and they can be cruel and hurtful.

Pets (most especially dogs) love you unconditionally no matter what mood you're in. They never talk back to you and they're always ready to give you love and greet you eagerly when you come home from a hard day.

Figure it out!

To the Dude: You have been reported.

To Raymond: You have been reported.

Answer 1

because, believe it or not, it is only in recent history, (like the last ten years), that people have realized that animals can feel pain. Some actually do not think that one can love an animal. That an animal cannot give what a human can.
When in fact it is hard to lose a pet, you put a lot of time and effort into the raising of that animal, just as you would a pet.
i mean is it safe to say that because you didnt give birth to a child that it is okay to do what you want because it didnt come from you? noooo, that would be inhumane.
while i cannot understand why many in society think that animals are dumb creatures, not deserving of love and affection because they do not have opposable thumbs, the fact is that for many they do.
an animals love and devotion are total, no matter what you do to the animal they will always love you and depend on you. they will always be devoted to you.
i am sorry for your loss, and hope you get your dog back.
i understand what you are going threw as a similar situation happened to me. Good luck.

Answer 2

I tend to think "Oh yeah. Perspective. Fair enough..." but that's just me. I know some people invest a lot of emotion in animals, and interpret their responses as emotional ones. But to love a pet more than the human beings you're blessed with strikes me - and apparently others - as crossing a line between ordinary anthropomorphic devotion and something altogether different. In fact, some people would be furious at the assertion of equality between dogs and "human children". They're not children, they're wild creatures raised or made tame so that humans can believe something gives them unconditional affection. Bottom line - it IS just a dog. However heartbroken you are, it has probably long forgotten you by now, and may even have forgotten your ex-husband. As long as it's fed and warm, it's not pining for you, it's involved in a routine with someone else. If you'll excuse me an anthropomorphic moment of my own, it has no problem with the fact that you're "just a human". It never made the mistake of thinking you were a dog.

And yes, I assure you, you could feel worse. Pray to any gods you believe in that you never have to look back on this day and say "all that pain, but it was just a dog." I send you healing thoughts, and hope this is the peak of pain your life will ever reach.

Peace.

Answer 3

People who have this view of pets only view them as a possession not as a member of the family or like a child. Someone like your ex who instead of giving your chihuahua back to you because he couldn't look after it he gave it away, Would he have given away your human child? I personally don't have any children and don't know if I even want any but I have one dog and three cats that I love like children, I had a cat while I was growing up and he died twelve years ago and when I talk about him to this day I still get tears in my eyes because I still miss him. People that don't understand this, are people that have never for whatever reason had the unconditional and total trust of an animal. Besides they don't call people pet parents for nothing. I'm sorry for your loss and hope that you find another special little friend to share your life with. And I hope your ex gets distemper.

Answer 4

I understand the love of a pet, and the hurt you must feel to have lost your dog without even getting to say goodbye. But come on, you loved your dog more than you love your children? That is a little either too much love for the pet or not enough love for your children.

Answer 5

I understand how you feel. I was blessed with my dog for almost 13 years, before she died. I raised her like she was a child. She was my Baby. People don't understand that pets feel what you feel, they are happy or sad when you are. When I got sick, my dog got sick. After I had my 2nd back surgery, she developed arthritis in her spine, losing all ability to walk. I helped her through this time and after a couple of months, after the vet said that there was nothing left to do but put her down, she regained the ability to walk, better yet, she began to run and jump again. I believe if people had bigger hearts and had to suffer as we did, they would change their tune about saying "It's only a dog..."

Some people are heartless toward animals while others just have never been able to get close enough to understand them. At times, they are better than children can be. Some people have had bad experiences with dogs/cats and are just scared of them.

Answer 6

I love dogs, but I dont know that I could love something more than a child or God.Thats because Im not a parent, but i dont know. I think it is cruel for someone to think (Its only a dog) thats just showing that they dont care for your feelings of your beloved pet. That is just mean that your ex wanted the dog and then just decided to give it away, without even asking you if you wanted it back. He probably just didnt want you to be happy. You should get another dog even though it probably wont be anything like your other dog. I think chiuhaus are cute.

Answer 7

When someone says it's "Only" an animal, I tend to think "you're ONLY a human." Just because they are lower on the food chain, so to speak, doesn't make them any less of a living thing than us.

Not everyone understands because not everyone is quite "blessed" with that kind of heart. Hell, by all means I shouldn't be, with the parents that gave me life. My mom can't see getting attached to any animal and my dad, well, let's just say we have to sneak our pets to the vet because heaven forbid we spend $50 for vaccinations and whatnot. Sometimes people just don't get it.

To tell the truth, with my "issues" in the depression department, I'm holding on to life itself with a few choice furry critters, purely because I don't trust even my parents to either care for them or rehome them well should something "happen."

Answer 8

Most people feel that being able to communicate on a purely verbal level is the only way to have a familial relationship with someone. Next time someone says it's only a dog, remind them that it has been a faithful friend for you for 12 years or however long. An emotional attachment is valid no matter what other people think, and for proof, My fiancee, whom lost her daughter, has had people say to her "She was only 4, it's not like you knew her long"
Some people are just stupid and insensitive and aren't worth talking to. If they say "It's only a dog" consider "It's only some jerk. No need to be friends with them"

Answer 9

I have only ever struck one person who didn't value the life of pets. So I think the majority of us do which is a good thing.

I know I still mourn the loss of my beloved cat Raider and now that I have a child I can honestly say I cannot see the difference between the depth of my love for him and my little girl.

My suggestion is to try and find out who he gave the dog to and try to get it back.

Best of luck!

Answer 10

I guess they have never been through it. I am an animal person as well but i have realized there are a lot of people who are not. My husband and I can't even talk about the idea of our dogs dying someday b/c it brings us down so much. I know how you feel. :O)