I've been dating someone off and on for 4 years - he's asked me to marry him - we went and looked at rings, etc....but we never did anything - never made any plans....i thought he was in love with me - but maybe not enough to marry
2007-01-08 10:00:48 · 7 answers · asked by regis 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Four years is a long time to date I understand your concern. I usually don't recommend ultimatums but upon hearing your circumstances you may want to issue one. I think you have earned the right to do so. What would you like to do? After all of this time do you still want to marry him? You can take control of the situation by simply asking him, "Can we plan for a summer wedding this year?" Reaffirm your desire to still be his wife--that you want to get started on the wedding plans and can the two of you revisit the jewelry store.
He may love you---but not enough to marry you---are the words you spoke in your question. This may be a reality that you will have to face. You don't want a marriage in which one party was forced or felt obligated to marry the other person just because they had dated for a long time. The foundation of a marriage should be mutual desire and not obligation. good luck.
2007-01-08 10:20:51 · answer #1 · answered by roddy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cold feet or it didn't feel right for both of you.
Sieze the initative and start planning dates. If you haven't done this by the end of Feb then you have the cold feet. If he gets dicey about the dates, then it is him.
If it happens then send me a wedding picture. It could just be not knowing where to start. Weddings can be a huge and stressful project. But doesn't have to be.
Get a calender and a pencil and ask him out to dinner. Start with a date. Then a place for the wedding then the reception. After dinner you will have all you need and your answer either way.
2007-01-08 18:08:15 · answer #2 · answered by harPOON capt uss TANG 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You say he asked you to marry him? Did he give you a ring? Did you say yes? Did you set a date after you said yes? Maybe you need to take a little initiative?
2007-01-08 18:03:45 · answer #3 · answered by albion53151 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you as much of a committment phobe as I am? Please take this the right way- your screen name is Leaving Las Vegas. Makes me think it's part of you.
Now, are you not making plans because he's not ready, or because he senses your lack of commitment?
Asking him isn't goin to help, because he can put on you if he feels like it?
Only you can draw out the answers.
If anything somebody says to you just feels right, stop thinking about it. It's right, go with it, and move from there.
Good luck to you both!
2007-01-08 18:04:45 · answer #4 · answered by starryeyed 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well looking at rings does not mean that this man is financially stable to take care of you unless u see that he has money but dont marry him for the cash and make sure he and you are ready for this life changing moment
2007-01-08 18:05:35 · answer #5 · answered by fefu 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NOTHING is wrong with you!!!!! ask him about it. if he really loves you he will tell you, but maybe he's not ready to commit. but u also need to ask him, if he will ever commit. because if he never does, then you can find a good man who you will love and will commit to you.
2007-01-08 18:05:20 · answer #6 · answered by HopelessCase 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think this guy isn't serious about getting married...But you should be talking to him about this...
2007-01-08 18:04:00 · answer #7 · answered by devilsadvocate 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋