I am the middle child of a older sister and a younger brother and my mother treats me like she hates me. I am happily married with two children. I have been out of my parents house for over 10 years and it seems like the happier I am the more she hates me. My sister who is 3 years older than me is extremely dependent on my parents. She attempted to move out about 5 times and always ends up back home with her two kids. My brother also moved out and ended up back home with my parents. I have two kids of my own and I would never treat them the way my mother treats me. Everytime I try to talk to my mom she either gets mad at me and stops talking to me or completely ignores me. What should I do? Could it be that she really hates me? Or is she just really mad because I have not had to move back home like my siblings?
2007-01-08 08:55:38 · 4 answers · asked by chema129 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Parents often treat their children differently when they need more attention and/or advice. But this seems really strange as you are an adult and not a child. Perhaps the others are somehow poisoning your mom against you. I really haven't the foggiest why a parent would react like that to an adult child.
2007-01-08 08:58:57 · answer #1 · answered by crazylegs 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some parents have a hard time letting go of the kids no matter how old they are--you sound very grounded and she might feel like she is not needed in your life--such as your brother and sister always needing her help and you do not--And then on the other hand it could be misdirected anger on her part--because you and your family are so self relient and she is strapped with the burden of your brother and sister and their kids she is tired--and she doesnt know how to break the chain of them returning without hurting their feelings --and you and your happiness reminds her of her misery--Human nature is such a strange thing --the saying you only hurt the ones you love comes to mind here--think about it--its an unconditional love and so no matter what you say or do you know that person will not turn away from you but forgive you--so could that be your Mom and the way she treats you?? That no matter what she says or does she knows you love her and wont ever turn away from her?? Tell her when she is hurtful--that you dont deserve that treatment and then ask her if there is something bothering her--that maybe you can help---take her to lunch treat her to a movie--get her out of the house that she is having to be responsible for the grown siblings and her grandkids --give her a nice break--sometimes kindness goes along way--heck send her flowers and have the note say--thinking of you and just wanted to say "I love you --thanks for being my Mom"
2007-01-08 17:09:59 · answer #2 · answered by skizzle-d-wizzle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You said it all when you said, "The happier I am the more she hates me." Without knowing your mother I can only guess, but it sounds to me like she's miserable and wants the rest of the world to be miserable with her. Anyone with the audacity not to depend on her for their every breath is rejected. But you know what? Being happy is the best revenge against someone who has hurt you.
2007-01-08 17:02:27 · answer #3 · answered by cruztacean1964 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe its neither, she knows you are the strong and independent one, so she doesn't baby you like she does the others. You may want to sit down and speak to your mother about this, don't ask her why she hates you!! Let her know you have been feeling this way and give her examples, you may be surprise on the answers you get.
2007-01-08 17:00:33 · answer #4 · answered by Brezzy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋