Okay... I am going to be honest and say that I have my boyfriends e-mail address password... this is the same thing he uses for everything, so my curiosity got to me, and i've checked his e-mail... (i know i know that is bad) but we've had a past about him being deceitful, and i've always given him the benefit of the doubt. First when we were brand new dating, he lied to another girl about me... gave her the run around as well as denied me... long story, I got over it... then in my house caught him watching/downloading porn on MY computer... "he wouldn't do it again" then i caught him hiding porn and his excuse..."I didn't think you would want to watch them..." well no $***! that was an argument, but feel I got the point across... told him I came to expect that he would still do it... (he is a guy) but I've been checking his e-mail and he always has messages from porn sites... "you have a new message" so and so wants to meet you...
I know I shouldn't be checking up on him...
2007-01-08 07:53:44 · 14 answers · asked by ShyGirl 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
and i don't know for sure if he is even replying back or visting... but what do i do? we actually have a great communication relationship. I can always tell him what I feel am thinking, and usually use what i "found" out and put it in the conversation. I know he loves the S*** out of me... but i hate that he visits these sites, watches porn while i am at work, lies about it, or stays up late and goes and does his thing watching some tv show with hot girls...
I just don't get it and am sick of not trusting him. i want to stop, to where i have visited a counselor, but it takes two... and even if i control my insecurities/jealosy, it's just gunna come back if he keeps up with what he is doing.... what do i do?
2007-01-08 07:56:53 · update #1
with these e-mails he is getting, he is a user. he has a username and password... and i've never checked to see if he is "using" this site, he might have in the past... i don't want to because i don't know what i would do/say if he were using it...
2007-01-08 08:01:35 · update #2
Sound like you're already facing this thing in a realistic manner. As bad as some women think it is, grown men have to look at naked ladies now and then. It's pretty rude of him to use your computer in my humble opinion, though.
And all that sneaking around? Tisk tisk. You're right that you shouldn't be doing that. But hey, there are a lot worse things you could've found than ordinary, run of the mill computer porn.
2007-01-08 07:58:12 · answer #1 · answered by Jeff 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
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2016-07-18 21:58:16 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its good that you care enough to check up on your Boyfriend. The thing is some guys have a real problem with porn. As ridiculous as it sounds you can become addicted to it. I know you talked to him about it but confront him again and bring some literature with you about how to get help. You can find plenty of places that have things to help with that problem. If he is willing to stop help him to get better. Its not healthy to look at that stuff at all eventually he won't even respect you because of it. So talk it out with him and if he isn't able to stop I'm sure a caring person like you can find a nice guy.
Best of Luck
2007-01-09 13:02:04 · answer #3 · answered by mattthecat779 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all quit snooping. Every time you jump his asss about something he will get sneakier and you will get more p1ssed so Get over it and get off his back!!!....his isn't hurting anything or anyone is he? Let him look all he wants. The reason he gets messages from porn sites is becasue they have tracking programs that keep track of all visitors and send back an automatic message....whenever you see one in the in mail open it and then block the sender - it should slow down after that.Now, take a chill pill and relax....
2007-01-08 08:03:20 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Boys will be boys and men will be men; you will never, ever, ever be able to stop them watching porn. We are visual creatures and as you know, stimulated visually, hence tendency to watch porn. It is definitely not being unfaithful. The fact that girls are not that much into porn does not mean boys should quit watching porn. It is the way their brains are wired.
As for him getting personal email from porn sites, it is difficult to conclude. He may be getting an innocent thrill of receiving and sending those emails. Can you ask him straight?
2007-01-08 08:03:46 · answer #5 · answered by Calculus 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all the answer is break up, you don't trust him, and since you are sneaking around he should not trust you. You have no business being together.
Porn is part of his life, why do you want to CHANGE him. Why should he not do something that he wants to do. You either do it with him, or leave. That is the choice.
Life is full of them, If it bothers you that much you should leave. Otherwise you are setting yourself up for a long life of fights.
2007-01-08 08:16:40 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
What are you still doing with him? He's lying to you about everything it seems and doesn't seem to be very loyal to you at all. You can do better than that! Boys will be boys, but they can still be mature. If he masturbated or something on his own time without the porn sites then it wouldn't seem so bad (like you said, he is a guy and sometimes they just can't help it). But with the porn sites and sneaking around with it makes it a big problem.
Drop him before he drops you, I know you can do better, there are plenty of other fish in the sea!
2007-01-08 07:59:47 · answer #7 · answered by Pyrai 3 · 0⤊ 3⤋
why are you with him to begin with... he had YOU on the side of having another WOMAN, is that just not clear to you............ you should not be with him at all and if he does anything with other women at this point you should not cry about it because your saying it's ok by even being with him after he clearly had you while still trying to maintain a relationship with another woman... you need to get a reality check and know that he is no good, you should know that you deserve better and if you continue with him then your pretty much saying that it's ok and you should except anything he does :) :) :) I do want to let you know that you are letting him hurt you if he does and that you should find a guy that wont do this to you..........
2007-01-08 08:06:55 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
there is not bad if u checking on him it will be good if u checking on him cause then what if he cheating on u that u never know? it good for u find out about his email as porn and etc, u should put spam email so he will never get their porn email, put spam email it will help and block website porno, if he said anything why did u put spam or block website, tell him why would he want to look porno? he have u and dont need it...if he get mad and still lookin at the porn just leave him...
2007-01-08 08:00:01 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Dont take it otherway but Porn might be good for him. He might lack the skills or knowledge, thus, he watches some porn and gets knowledge on how to keep you pleased.
Just think of it as his devotion towards you.
2007-01-08 08:05:54 · answer #10 · answered by Ehab 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋