she is 12yrs and want to talk on the on the internate with boys and calls her cell phone? I have taken away the cell phone and told her is she cont to talk to boys there will be consequence... she has change so much in the last weeks.. please mothers & fathers help...
2007-01-08 07:44:54 · 14 answers · asked by tammy36 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
forgot to mention... she was talking to boys but the boy she was talking with was talking dirty., she was text msg him durning School hours.. I talk with her all the times. I always ask her questions and I told her if she want to know to ask me or her father and auntys.. I am very open minded mother and tried very hard to keep the communication open. for some reason her friends has a big inpack on her. Most of her friend mothers are single and don't have a problem with 12yrs talking with boys older.. ... sorry so long..
2007-01-08 09:42:59 · update #1
What harm could talking on the phone to boys cause? She sees them at school. Just set a time limit for calls, and a limit to when no more calls are to be made. Ex: no phones calls, incoming or outgoing after 9:00 p.m.. I have done this for our 3 girls, ages 13-14-16, and it seems to be working. As far at the cell phone thing goes, good for you for taking it away!
2007-01-08 07:54:37 · answer #1 · answered by CaReBeAr 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My 13 year old daughter has been with MSN for over 1 year, but before we signed up, we had a family meeting and discussed what was expected and what was allowed. This was for her protection and we discussed the password and the fact that I could log on at any time and view her history. Both my husband and I were nervous about it but she is very good with following the rules. I don't agree with her posting on myspace, and one of the rules was no personal info or pictures on the web....too many weirdo's out there.
I would set up rules for the phone, and give her some space. My daughter is shy and doesn't get many calls on the phone; it's mainly MSN.
We just gave her a cellphone this Christmas, but she knows it's linked to mine and I will be going over the bill with her when it arrives.
Good luck. These are tougher times to grow up then when I was a young girl, and we can only hope we're doing the right thing. Keep communicating!
2007-01-08 08:05:10 · answer #2 · answered by laura g 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok i know you said that you want help from mothers and fathers but some hlpe from someone her age might help too. i think that you should let her tlak to this boy,she might really liek him,and as long as she isnt saying anyhting bad or wrong,then i dotn see what the problem is. your daughter is growing up,im sure you gotinto arguments with your parents when you were this age. you shoudl give her the cell phone back...and if you are worried what about a compromise.you could let her talk to him on the hpone for like a half hour every gnitha dn thast it,if she doesnt obey then tkae the phone away again but jsut give her a chance. by the way,you cant make the right decision without making a mistake first.
2007-01-08 07:55:36 · answer #3 · answered by Livvy 2 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
By telling her flat-out she can't talk to boys on the phone or the internet, you're only going to be pushing her to do it behind your back. I think it's much better if you try to have an open and honest relationship with her and allow her to talk to boys on the phone and the internet under certain situations.
If you allow her to call boys on the phone, make sure you know who the boy is. Tell her not to give her phone number out so they can't call her, but she can call them (so that way you can keep up with who she's talking to). Let her know when it's acceptable to call people. Set up some sort of "call times" - for instance, don't let her talk on the phone past a certain time at night (i.e. 9pm). If she does get calls from friends (girls or boys), make sure she knows to tell her friends not to call past that designated call time.
If you allow her to use the internet, keep a track of her chat dialogues and make sure she only chats with friends from school or people she knows in person. Encourage her not to talk to strangers on the internet and warn her of consequences and dangers of doing so (especially inforce that it's not okay for her to use her real name, or disclose where she lives or what school she goes to).
I know this seems scary and new, but you have to remember that she is almost a teenager, and she'll be going through a tough time in the next few years. It's really hard being a teenager, and having a mom who denies allowing her to grow up some will make it more rough, and will jeopardize your relationship with her.
2007-01-08 07:57:28 · answer #4 · answered by eurekablyth 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First you need to know who these boys are. If they are friends from school it should be ok for her to talk to them. Maybe try limiting the amount of time she can spend on the phone or the computer. I have a 13 year old daughter and she is allowed 1hour of my space after her homework is finished. Also I monitor constantly who she has on her friends list, and she is only allowed to use the living room computer for easier monitoring. Safeguards like this allow your daughter some freedoms and allows you some peace of mind.
2007-01-08 07:56:39 · answer #5 · answered by Should be Working! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's normal for a 12 year old girl to talk to boys. When I was 12 I was talking to boys on the internet. I even had my first boyfriend at that age. As long as they are being appropriate I don't see any harm in it. Just monitor her if you are concerned.
2007-01-08 08:07:01 · answer #6 · answered by Amanda 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
a few things:
1) does she know these boys-like does she go to school with them? church? play sports? something like that...than i say its ok.
2) if she DOESN"t know these boys, and you can put a parental block on the internet go for it. i'm 22 and i dont just go chat with boys on the internet (then again, i'm also engaged, but wouldnt otherwise). you just can't be sure of anything anymore.
But if the boys are people she knows, then let her talk to them. If she uses AIM, you can make it so other people can't contact her and therefore redoses the chance that some pervert with IM her. If she uses myspace, her accont has to be private and no one can contact her.
I hope that helps.
2007-01-08 07:49:47 · answer #7 · answered by hilwiesemann 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
this is coming from a 15 year old---im not gonna get smart or nothin, but if u do that 2 her now, shes only gonna b more tempted 2 hide her conversations from u later so just let her be. besides, i dont remember any of my friends at 12 having any relationships with guys that the moms or dads would have to worry about. so, for rite now at least, i think u dont have anything 2 worry about.....lol
2007-01-08 08:08:56 · answer #8 · answered by resqchic 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to be strict.Chat rooms are not safe.12year olds are not meant to be on Yahoo Answers.You cant tell her not to talk to boys- she will anyway at school-Your daughter has channged because of puberty.She will need your love and support.At this ag not all girls show an interest in boys as a result of hormones.Maybe you could let her talk to at least one boy she really likes and one boy only that she knows and keep an eye on this friendship.
2007-01-08 07:57:19 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
as long as her friends she talks to on-line are her age - no older - she should be OK.... let her know she can talk to pre-approved friends the two of you agree too - those and only those friends are approved to talk on-line with - if she wants to add additional people she must get your permission first prior to engaging in on-line discussions..... do the same with the cell.... instruct her about the cell phone bill that comes each month and lets you know if she is talking to anyone outside of her pre-approved list of friends - if she breaks the rules she loses both modes of communication and has to revert back to the pre-historic ways of our early days!!! writing letters....
2007-01-08 07:54:23 · answer #10 · answered by D. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋