I give my fiancee's mother a birthday gift and xmas gift every year and as always I never get a gift when my birthday comes around. Should I just stop giving her presents? I did get a xmas gift, even though it was a cheap afterthought in January. Is a gift necessary to soften her attitude towards me as a future son in law?
2007-01-08 06:10:34 · 15 answers · asked by salieri.mozart 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
She never gives her other family members gifts either, I should have brought this up. Sometimes she doesn't even give her children much of anything. She relies on the rest of her big family to get her children gifts.
2007-01-08 08:34:44 · update #1
You should give a person a gift because you want to, not because you are trying to win someone over. Maybe, instead of getting her a gift by yourself, go ahead and look for something with your girlfriend to give her. Your girl can give it to her mom and say something like "We both thought you would really like this."
2007-01-08 06:44:44 · answer #1 · answered by deerogre 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A gift will probably not soften her attitude towards you. She likes you, dislikes you or hasn't decided yet. I think it will seem very odd to quit giving her gifts, now, however. Does it really matter to you if she gives you a gift? If not, remember her on special occasions and take satisfaction in knowing you did the right thing and do not need any validation from her. Remember, she may think no one is good enough for her daughter.
2007-01-08 06:23:01 · answer #2 · answered by David M 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Did no one ever tell you it's better to give than to recieve? Why do you continue giving her gifts, so you'll get something? That's a crummy reason to give a gift. And when you get one you don't sound very appreciative.
If you give a gift because you genuinely care about this person and don't expect to get anything back, then continue giving her gifts.
However if you only give her gifts to get one back , just buy a card and fergeddaboudit.
2007-01-08 06:59:05 · answer #3 · answered by Lizzy-tish 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, I wouldn't give her a gift. Not because I am giving to receive, I wouldn't give because your future mother-in-law is showing you that she really doesn't care about you. It's the thought that counts and if she appreciated you being her future son-in-law she would show it by giving you a gift on special occasions. It doesn't cost much to by you an inspirational book or something in that area. Don't let people make you feel they are more important than you.
2007-01-08 06:39:21 · answer #4 · answered by Vashti A 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you give a gift it is the thought that counts. If you do not have good feelings towards her then don't give one. If it is important to you that she thinks good of you and a gift will help then give away! You should never give a gift expecting one in return.
2007-01-08 06:18:06 · answer #5 · answered by Loren T 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give the gift not so you receive back but just to be a better person. Big deal, you get one less gift at your birthday.
2007-01-08 07:11:53 · answer #6 · answered by MichaelP 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HELL NAW!!!!! If she didn't get you any gifts the first few years you've known your fiancee, then don't get her a DAMN thing at all! Doesn't her lack of gift-giving towards you tell you something? No disrespect intended (I'm just stating the facts); she DOESN'T like you AT ALL!
2007-01-08 07:06:29 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the reason is to soften her attitude towards you then you have binded yourself. It will be cheaper and more gentle on your conscience if you just be yourself and accept the fact that she has the "right" to like or dislike what you portray as your true self
2007-01-12 00:28:28 · answer #8 · answered by mllttsmn2 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should give out of the goodness of your heart, to give only because you expect to receive is a horrible thing to do.
If that is the reason you give, I suggest you stop giving because it will only upset you more each time you do not receive.
2007-01-08 06:15:31 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
No not really, if you have tried giving before to no avail----WHY TRY.The cheap Christmas gift was probably to let you know that she knows that you exist----but doesn't care.Do unto others as you want done to you.Give it a try.
2007-01-08 08:24:16 · answer #10 · answered by Maw-Maw 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋