Should parents continue giving money to adult son or daughter?

Answer 1

At some point parents need to break cycle of giving $ to the adult children. I'm not talking about giving $25 here or there because they want to. I am talking about giving them money to get out of debt.

I say this as someone who has seen the vicious cycle between my parents and my sister. College= credit card debt; mom and dad pay off to "help" ect.

My parents tried to "help" my sister several other times, she's now 30 and just learning to manage her debt. My parents said looking back, they wish they hadn't helped her out so much. It just enabled her and she didn't learn proper money management.

Since I am younger and got to "see" all this, I did a little better with my money management. Mostly, because I learned from my sister's mistakes. I think if you want them to learn to handle their $ properly at some time, you just need to cut the cord.

Answer 2

It really depends on the situation. My adult daughter has an uncurable disease, and cannot work at times because of it's flare-ups. We give her money to cover expenses. She's a hard-worker, but her disease just takes over sometimes, and there is nothing she can do. She's already had 3 surgeries, with many more in her future.

If there is a REAL reason to give money, then go ahead. If it is laziness, then don't give.

Answer 3

Once a kid is old enough to work, I feel if they want extra money, they should get a job. However, you didn't mention if it's a once in a while situation, or are these adult children getting an allowence. Ultimately, it's the parents decision. If my parents still wanted to give me an allowance, I sure wouldn't turn it down! But I'll say, once my kids are old enough to get a job, they'll be earning their spending money!

Answer 4

My answer would vary based on the situation.
Is the kid trying to get an education and needs some extra cash while they are in college? Are they trying to raise a family and have had cash issues? Are they suspected drug addicts? It's tough to answer your question without knowing all the facts.
I think that at some point you have to stop bailing your children out, but only the parent can determine when that time is, if ever.

Answer 5

If they have a job and ask for help once in a blue moon and pay you back then I think that is OK. But if they don't have a job then NO they need to grow up and get a job and pay for their own stuff. They are ADULTS now not little kids. I know sometimes kids get in a bind and need some help when their paycheck is not that good that is fine AS LONG AS they pay you back. Good Luck

Answer 6

Depends on the situation, If its recurring problem, and their son/daughter doesnt know how to live within their means, I say no let them learn the hard way. If its something that just came out of no were and they need a little help then thats fine. Just dont expect it back, just advise them they need to save their money for just such a occasion.

Answer 7

It depends. I'm 21 and have 2 children. My husband works out of state. Well, If he is out on a job and I am unable to get money from him for a bill or groceries, I will borrow money from my dad. My dad has no problem with this because he always gets paid back in a timely fashion. Now, I think it would be different if I just mooch off my dad.There's a difference in borrowing and mooching

Answer 8

If it works for both of them. But it can set up a situation where the adult child is dependent on the parents and also angry that they're dependent. Sorta creates a crappy situation all around.

Answer 9

depends? does the adult son/daughter live at home, does he or she have a job? does he or she spent money on stupid crap? is he or she currently in college?

if he or she is in college and gets descent/good grades why not?

if he or she does work hard, why not slip them a little money once in awhile as long as they don't buy stupid crap all the time.

if they do nothing at home..no responsiblities... no cleaning, no lawn care, no trash, no dishwashing, no painting... and constantly makes a pigsty...Hell No!

if he or she refuses to work and lives at home expense free then HELL NO, thrown them out of the house.

Answer 10

depends.. if you are paying for everything then he or she should get a job.. If they are doing everything they can to make ends meet then helping once in a while is not a bad thing but don't make a habit of helping or else they will expect you to help all the time. They will never learn to do things on their own or clean up their own messes.