anyone have a good way of dealing with a physical disability?

Question

i have a genetic bone condition which means i break/ crack a bone roughly every couple of years. the symptoms of my condition are pretty much supposed to stop when i get to about 20 years old (not long to go, im 18) but sometimes it gets me so depressed. the thought of breaking another bone actually scares the shi t out of me, partly cos i hate how people react and being judged, partly cos im a musician and i cant play if ive hurt my arm, and partly cos im a man and i dont want to be weak (although im muscular and dont look like i have a problem). i dont know if/ how i can get it through it if it happens again. also i worry about doing something that will do permanent damage, like break my neck or something. also sometimes it dettaches me from my friends, cos i cant tell a lot of them cos i know they wont understand or will act differently around me. anyone have any tips on how to deal with this? anyone else have a similar problem?
thanks a lot

Answer 1

I'm over 40 and have a similar problem with my back. It really works on your head because of the STUPID things people judge you as and the pethetic things they say like some of the things I just read as answers from some that should have been aborted people wrote. Remember it's people like them you have to deal with and ignore in this world, they are why I carry a gun. You are who YOU are and be thankful for the problems you don't have. Like being STUPID!!!

Answer 2

You are alive now, dont waste it. So what if you break another bone? I have a spinal deformity, i am in pain 24 hours a day. However, I have two beautiful children despite being told not to with my spine, and before children I was a dancer. If you want to do something then do it sod the consequences. This is your life, dont waste it, have silly and daft memories to look back on when you are old.
I once suffered agoraphobia ( fear of going out) I wated years staying in through fear. You have to push yourself, make yourself proud and what ever happens does not matter. I had to tell my friends I had mental illness. Christ that was scary. I didn't want to do certain things and they thought I was being boring. Once they new I wasn't being moody but was ill they were cool. Some like my husband dont understand but they accept it.
NEVER HIDE THE TRUTH, IT ONLY HURTS YOU. BE PROUD OF WHO YOU ARE AND TELL THE WORLD. Good luck

Answer 3

i have two disabled kids and im horrified at your first two answers im thinking 10 yrs down the line this could be my son expressing himself here i definitely wouldnt want that response,as you know some disabilitys are physical and can be diagnosed, but ignorant people as your first two replies have an obvious undiagnosed brain disorder and cant be blamed for what they say or do the hard part is one day they will get old and infirm and obviously they will have to hate themselves then, anyway back to you, if you cant get hold of a support group online then start one up yahoo has a website you can set up your own forum group not only will talking to others help you but you will feel better for helping others too, that will help the depression side i havent a clue how to help the physical side only tell you 2 yrs aint long youve already done 18 ,and wish you all the best, i wish my kids disabilities would get better when they get older i will be lucky if they get to your age, and when faced with a negative attitude in future remember wat i said above and shrug it off you are the better person

Answer 4

All of us have a disability of some kind. Some are not seen like yours, people who are color blind, some people who have arthritis, allergic asthmatics, or other diseases. Some people have a defect of the heart, like some of the people who answered first or some people who don't care about others. You are right that you can't tell some friends as they will think you are complaining unnecessarily or making excuses. Think positively and know that you are not alone as there is someone with the same or a worse problem. Try eNotAlone.com and see if you find someone there that you can share with rather than Yahoo answers. Adopt a good attitude and believe what Eleanor Roosevelt said "nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent."

Bud

Answer 5

If your friends don't understand then they are not real friends, i don't wish to depress you but that is the truth as i see it.

I had a friend with your condition when i was in school, and she was the happiest person i have ever known.
She never really talked about her condition but i think she was just so happy to be alive that every day was a happy event for her.

You have to understand that every one has issues in their life, but when you get over this life will be so much sweeter.

As for your worries try and be proactive, talk to your Dr's about your worries, see if there are preventative measures you can take to keep you from harm.

You also have to keep in perspective that you have a talent, music, write songs about your problems, expel your emotion, keep your mind on things that keep you sane.

I have also found that being cautious can do more harm then good.

I'm not sure if this will help you but i hope i have been honest enough with you to make you think.

Answer 6

The best way to deal with this is realize how strong it has made you. It will put limitations on you, less rough play etc, but should not be something to cause you so much concern. There;s no reason to detach yourself from people and this condition does not make you weak at all infact having gone thru this will make you stronger and more able to relate to others in life facing medical conditions. You have been very strong, and continue to do so. try not to judge yourself so harshly remember you are your biggest critic and others do not judge you as much as you do yourself. have a great day.

Answer 7

your a bigger man than you think. i cant begin to think of all the things i do on a daily basis that you most probably cant do. i think you are wrong to judge your friend so harshly though. I'm sure they would understand your worries and concerns if you just told them you would feel better. i always say a problem shared is a problem halved. i work in a special needs school with lots of different physical problems, but they have mental problems too. always look on the bright side to make you feel stronger like your minds working fine and your disability will get better, you have strong feelings and are aware of other peoples needs too. good luck with your next few years and don't do to much damage. x

Answer 8

I broke my neck &now have degenerative spinal disease, all disc in my back R ruptured. I'm on Disability. I can relate with what Ur saying. I have 2 B careful when I go out watch out 4 being pushed our bumped in to. The best advice I can give U is BE CAREFUL. think about what Ur doin, watch for others. Try to avoid possible dangerous situations. God Bless U & good luck. I hope this helps

Answer 9

Call 211. It's United Way's Phone Number and they can get you in touch with resources in your community, like support groups with people who have the same condition or similar situations. United Ways is free and confidential.

And ignore the Point-Raiths with the negative answers above. Life has a funny way of dealing with those types.

Answer 10

Sounds like you most of all needed to express the things you are feeling as you have a good handle on what you have and that it will eventually stop. I would say to talk about it...with others who have it would be best, but if not, others who deal with disabilities. This is just a small stone in a mountain that is your life and you have done well with it to this point. You are going to make it.
GBY