B+ student. Great manners, eevery teacher says he is soooo polite and friendly to all students and is extremely popular. he cant remeber to bring home books or homework..many meetings and he still can not remeber specific tasks...cant remeber to brush teeth, clean up or do anything except play..
2007-01-08 03:27:58 · 15 answers · asked by caseydog 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Grade-Schooler
spank him
2007-01-08 12:27:09 · answer #1 · answered by $Will$ 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Um, don't let him get away with it. Sounds like he's learned that he can talk his way out of forgetting homework, or someone will struggle to get it for him, or the teacher is giving him extra time.
I'd make sure he knows that he has resources...making lists, calenders, etc. I'd go through a couple of days with the routine, esp with brushing teeth and cleaning. And warn him that from now on there is no help if he forgets his work. And talk to his teachers. They are obviously facilitating this. Backward chain this, with reminding him to write it in a notebook. Then let him fail.
If he forgets his homework. How sad....you aren't going to go pick it up for him. Empathy "I'm so sorry son, what are you going to do about it?" After talking to his teacher and assuring him that you won't hold him responsible, let the teacher know that you'd appreciate some help. I had to do that with my son's teacher, they just kept saying that it was 'okay'. I was like are you nuts? He wouldn't get away with it at a job! So finally they were on my side and gave him an F for not turning the work in on time. Josh was shocked. He said it wasn't fair. I replied "Wow...not fair? Can you tell me why?" He sputtered and cried, and I pointed out that the teacher specifically said it was due on Tuesday, not Wednesday. I'm so sad for you son. It took about a week of being consistent and he got over it.
With housework, he doesn't play until it's done. If that means I take his xbox, how sad for him. The rule is chores first. Oh..feel free to join us at dinner when your room is clean.
You're going to have to play hardball, but really, by 11 yo they should be better than that. It took my ten yo about three weeks of testing me to realize I was very serious about the cleaning, and about his bath routine. He still tests me every couple of months, he's almost twelve. But by making it a habit now, you're saving him a lot of trouble later when the costs are higher. You might read 'Parenting with Love and Logic'. It's very helpful.
2007-01-08 08:58:34 · answer #2 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is a hard one. My daughter is similar, now 12. She is an excellent student and very well behaved. She had that problem about 2 years ago. We set up this thing with her, her teacher and myself. Everyday before she left the class room she had a check list of things that had to come home, her teacher signed it after she confirmed everything was there. In the morning before she left for school, we had a simialr check list to confirm she was bringing everything she needed back. It helped a lot, we no longer use the list and she is much better about remembering on her own. As far as home items like brusing teeth and so on, I think just constant reminding every day, and hopefully by 18 they remember on their own.
2007-01-08 03:35:04 · answer #3 · answered by elb366 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
With privileges come responsibilities. Take away some of his privileges and I bet you that he will soon learn to do as he should.
I have a son who just wants to play his video games. I ask very little of him to be honest, and it can get really irritating for the few things I do expect to go undone!! But I have found that if you remove that little Memory card from the video game I have his undivided attention.
He is 21 and I still won't hesitate to take it.
But you have to get there attention. Any way that you can.
He has responsibilities just like you do. Keep up the good work. I have confidence in you!!
2007-01-08 03:46:57 · answer #4 · answered by dragonlady 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well it is hard on you know because i would do this if i was in your shoes i want you to ask him to make a list of stuff that he needs to bring home ask him to check stuff off as he go through the list and if he don't just go and get him a electronic organizer those stuff really helped me you just have to set a time when it goes of and remind him to take his books and homework with him. If you don't know where to buy one just look in some electronic store such as best buy, the source, future shop and many more that you come up with and for the brushing your teeth part just remind him everyday and hope that he will get in to the schedule but if he don't just remind him everyday and on the source i have many reference to help you
2007-01-08 11:25:36 · answer #5 · answered by hockey pro 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, lots of things running through my head. Seems like he is just a wonderful child while he is NOT at home. He is popular, therefore, in his mind concessions should be made to pamper him. BS is my first response. You have really good answers above about taking away video games, etc, but you need to find out WHY he only has memory problems regarding home (chores, homework, etc). It really sounds like a control issue and he is winning. I would definitely be starting the "you forget, you loose" technique.
2007-01-08 04:35:05 · answer #6 · answered by GP 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Create a chart reflecting his responsibilities including brushing teeth, picking up his laundry- whatever you want him to do. For each day, have him check each task as he completes it. Pay him maybe 10 cents per task completed and follow-up. The "allowance money" will serve as an incentive while he'll learn responsibility as well. I do this for my (close to) 10 year old daughter. It works great!
2007-01-08 06:03:19 · answer #7 · answered by Teddy Bear 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ask your child. Sit down with him/her, decide the reward together for doing the right things and also pick the punishment together for not doing the things agreed to. It has helped with my now teen daughters. Unfortunately, they should be taught to do these things starting at age two so by the time they are older it is just a habit. I know it sounds odd, but it is a fact.
2007-01-08 05:09:10 · answer #8 · answered by Sarah S 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He can't remember because he doesn't want to. Put some rules in place. If he doesn't follow the rules, he is punished. No phone, TV, going out with friends ect. He get the picture/idea and he will start to remember. He can write things down so he doesn't forget. But there are ways, I have only given you a few thoughts/ideas.
2007-01-08 04:12:58 · answer #9 · answered by GRUMPY 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
get one of those checklist boards and put it up on the fridge or in his room--The ones that say-brush teeth--homework, chors, set out slothes, etc..i've seen this...or you can make your own--Decide on a list of things that you both agree he needs to be resonsible for on a daily basis--and then make a checklist--Create a reward system for him--...if this does not work, you have to ask yourself how major the problem is--there are different schools of thought--some would say--take it easy--boys will be boys--and they are dealing with growing up, etc..Give him time and space and he will become responsible--others would tell you he has ADD and that he needs to be on meds--
2007-01-08 10:48:20 · answer #10 · answered by Shay 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well congrats that he is well behaved, that is an accomplishment all in itself! ...but if he forgot his homework, he wouldn't be outside playing at all. he would go out for a little "trash pick up around the neighborhood" i did that with my neice (6 yo) who lived with me, when she wouldn't stop lying. gave her a garbage bag, and rubber gloves. we walked together and she cleaned up the neighborhood. she knew i was not going to stand for her lying, i put my foot down, and she never did it again. good luck
2007-01-08 03:39:52 · answer #11 · answered by 26 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋