How do I grow up and mature?

Question

In the past I have done a lot of unacceptable things. For example I was rude and nasty to my parents and elderly adults. I would say nasty things in spite of people. When I lost friends was then I realize I was acting so wrong.
I still do these things. It is not until after I have said or did smething, how wrong I was in doing it. I am now afraid to meet people because I am afraid I will slip again. I am trying to change but it is extremely difficult. So any thoughtful advice would be highly appreciated.

(Please no bashing. Because as I have said I am trying to change.)

Answer 1

A good friend of mine gave me some good advice that I will pass along to you. His advice was "to always put your mind into gear before putting your tongue into action". Words can cut deeper than any knife and the scars can remain for a lot longer also. But if you do act and assume responsibility for your actions then people will see and watch you changing right before their eyes and they will possibly forgive you for previous indiscretions. Like yourself I used to be very mouthy and disrespectful,especially to those closest to me. But with age and maturity these relationship have improved greatly and today I am much more able to talk in a manner more acceptable and give and accept love and others opinions more openly also. Be yourself and treat and speak with others as you like to be spoken to and things will look much better for you. Best of luck with this goal.

Answer 2

Realistically people don't change unless environmental traumas occur. I think after taking a "back seat" in life for awhile will provide the reflective time and motive for a sincere change. In the interim all you can do is practice being more mindful of thoughs and words. This is easier said then done. Just start small, while taking progressive steps, and not faltering when the progress is stunted-just accept setbacks and persist. I had much of the same problem (and still do) but what helped me was an offense to my ego. I like to consider myself smart and one time someone told me a big indicator of someone not smart is someone who can't articulate words well and gain hearts and minds of others. For some reason that sat with me and I now feel I'm jeopardize my intellectuality by being trite and ineffectual.This is my own personal trauma that keeps me in check; and I think its a good thing to have. Just coming to the realization of how what you say and act really does influence others perception of you. Even in the most trivial of relationships (family, strangers). Good Luck!

Answer 3

I think the fact that you are asking this question is a very good sign that you are actually starting to change already! So you're definitely on the right track.
You have probably already learned from your mistakes. But you can also talk to your parents or close friends, people who care about you, and ask them about situations where they thought you behaved inappropriately and what you could do differently in similar situations.
You can also meet with a psychologist or counselor and go over these kinds of things with that person.

Answer 4

i discover it somewhat humorous that a great form of people have faith women folk are extra mature than adult adult males. that's a sexist feminist perception that girls folk are extra mentally mature then adult adult males. They of course think of they are stronger. The adulthood relies upon on the guy no longer their gender. some studies in extreme college do no longer practice something. women purely mature bodily swifter. there is infantile women folk and infantile adult adult males. it rather is not unique to one gender. some people not at all go away youngsters and enhance up into person adult adult males and girls. properly of direction society expects adult adult males to take all the duty. A manhood is earned yet a womanhood is earned purely for being a woman. What a shame.

Answer 5

for one i would go and personally apologise to my family and close friends for any wrong doing.explain to them that you are trying to change and that you accept that you have done some weong things.then maybe you could go and do work for a charity or feed homeless.anything that lets you help people and see that you have a pretty good life.(not to mention you helping these people will give them hope and maybe help them get on their feet)you will slip again.people have bad days.i have them.just always think before you speak and if you are mad at someone,walk away and calm down.try to put yourself in thier shoes..in a few days talk with them and be nice and get out whatever your so upset about.i find that going to church helps.i try not t push that on people because they have to have that desire thierself but gettong involved works wonders for me..good luck to the new you!!

Answer 6

The fact that you recognize the problem and are trying to conscienciously address it is the first step toward achieving maturity. Basically, being mature consists of thinking of other peoples feelings and needs instead of your own. When you realize that you are only a small part of a much larger human society and that your needs and wants are also just a small part of that great whole, then you are ready to look and think outside of yourself and begin to render service to others to meet their needs without thinking about yourself. When we are children, we think only of our own needs and wants. As we grow and mature, we begin to look at the world around us and realize that life isn't just all about us. When we take responsibility for our own actions and then reach out to help others, we are achieving maturity for that is what being an adult or a grown up is all about. We take responsibility for others besides ourselves. As a parent, we take responsibility for a spouse and children. We serve their needs and wants before our own. As a worker, we take responsibility for our assignment and the needs of our coworkers and customers. As a child of God, we take responsibility for our neighbors and serve the needs of those around us. True maturity comes in losing our own lives in the service of others. When we put others first, that service turns into love for our fellow beings and becomes a consuming passion to see the happiness in other's faces that was a result of our service.
So the short answer is for you to quit thinking about yourself and find a way to give service to others. The joy of serving others will eventually rub off on your attitude toward how you deal with everybody. Believe me, people will notice the difference.
Best wishes.

Answer 7

Be yourself Kiddo, and smarten the freak up!!! Your all you have so make the most of it because before you know it it'll all be taken away from You and it'll all be over, for You!!! It costs You nothing to be nice but the price You pay for being less so You've already paid. You know now; it will all be better from this moment on, Good luck little one!!!!

Answer 8

I'll be watching THESE answers! I know a couple of 50 years olds that might benefit from some of the wisdom here. They never grew up either!

Answer 9

If you really have it in your head to change, you will.The way that you will is--IN TIME.Everything takes time.You have perfected your attitude, now you'll have to retrain your behavior.The mouth says what the Heart feels, so are you angry or just negative?You my dear were taught also.So take the time to change---You might like it..Good luck in your future.

Answer 10

By admitting you made all those mistakes and your willingness to change those "bad' ways, you have already begun to walk the road of growing up. It not easy, but it is possible. Measure twice ...... cut once.
blessings ..... 1 more thing .. U will continue to make mistakes and do stupid things.....