My boyfriend wants to cheat?

Question

I was browsing my boyfriends laptop yesterday when I saw his msn history report (a folder that keeps all records of his msn messages)

In it I found that he was still chatting to his ex whom he for me , he was asking her to come over to live him him from france, he still tells her he loves her and that he misses her and cant wait to see her again. AS U CAN IMAGINE IT WAS VERY HARD FOR me having to read all that, I mean I understand that he misses her mayb he wants to be with her afterall, I can only move on after that, But I dont even know how to tell him I know about it, I just find it do hard now to even kiss him or do anything with him cause I know what he has been up to, I asked him last night if he still talks to her he denied all this. what should I do (apart from leaving him of coz cause thats what ill be doing) but how do i let him know.

wasnt excatly reading his emails, I was browsing received files cause I was looking for the pictures I had sent him. SO technically it wasnt even his messages. another thing why its hard for me to tell him is because He has been out of work for 2 months he is starting his new job today so u can imagine he has been stressed out, so the last thin I want to do is put more pile to his worries.


and yes the emails are very recent..last 03/01/07

Answer 1

maybe he didnt give himself enough time to get over her that tends to screw up other relationships cuz they dont give themselves enough time to get over the other person and they (especially guys) feel the best way is to just jump right back in there with another girl then you probably figure out you were just a rebound thing..sorry. but you know for a fact he still talks to her and if he denied it and you just caught him in a lie do you really want your relationship to be a bunch of lies? even if he does clear all the lies up you still have to think about it...ya know

Answer 2

First off you were snooping ,but we are all guilty of it at some point so don't punish yourself . Be truthfull with him and confront him with the facts of what you have found and demand an explanation . You have a lot of thinking to do about this like how much do I care for him , will I ever be able to trust him without wondering what or where his is when you are not together . He is the guilty one here and you deserve an answer .In some ways has cheated on you already by misleading this girl and lying to you .
He may not be as in love with you as you are with him or how would not feel like something is missing in your relationship .

I know what this feels like . I feel your pain you want to forget what you found but can't , you need to deal with this , and figure out if he is worth it and go from there remember everyone will have an opinion as to what to do but you need to follow your heart .

Take care and good luck

Answer 3

Hy there! hallo well its not your fault at first, a message is made to be viewed by you, its maybe a faith that u should know,so don't feel guilty about it, then u have made good move to know is that facts all false or true , again u did the right move u had confirmed the facts in the mails are true when he denied it.now since his first day of job, u had cared him again u have the compassionate move thts too right for person like u, but a missing facts his y must he lie to you? so he is hdding something tht must not be shared with u.this is called dishonesty. u may be used as tool for him to get his job done.then u must know his previous relation too thts ur security before u letting him in ur life. did u do tht? so he plays as twin role having u for bennifits and having his ex for private life.. u stand as donor for him not beloved as i could see. but u cant make a sudden move , u need a strong evidences for u make him tell " yes i do have tht relation still".
but u might be emotionally weak,so build ur self mentally first before facing the possibilities whitout him,
the best person for u to be with u is ur parents and close friend.cocnsole them and make things whitout serious situations, danger at first cause, remeber tht always.

Answer 4

This happened yesterday ... and today you are still referring to him as your boyfriend and not your ex-boyfriend. That's the part I can't understand. What kind of guidance is it that you need in order to realize you are being taken advantage of, walked on, lied to and cheated on (even if only by intention, so far)? Just get out. Don't give a thought to "adding to his pile of worries." He doesn't seem so worried that he's distracted from trying to cheat on you with his ex. I'd say he has plenty of room on his plate, apparently. Get out. How many opportunities do you give a person to look you in the face and bold faced lie to you? Get out.

Answer 5

Of course he wants to cheat or exercise his options to nail as many willing and able chicks (like you) until he's trapped by marriage...and maybe even then. A "girlfriend" to a guy is free sex. What don't you get about this? You've been watching too many sappy chick flicks. Get real.

Answer 6

just tell tell his what happened that you was looking at his comp trying to find some pics and you came accosed it them ask him why he lied to to you. you know what u asked him if he was still talking to her and he out and out lied to you why should you care about hurting his feeling after he hurt urs. just tell him that you thought that the two of you was commited and ask him if he is just using u until him and this girl in france get back together sounds to me like you are a 3rd wheel in this scenerio

Answer 7

Its that classic, curiosity killed the cat, honesty and trust is the key to a realtionship between two people, he may be wary of telling you incase you react, But you have to clear you mind of his intentions, my advice is to talk.

Answer 8

I know you don't want to hear this but dump his a$$. If he is not going to be 100% faithful to you he is a waste of time. He's already lied to you. he is not worth it.

Answer 9

You need to consider if this person is very important to you or not, if this person is very important to you, then you have to tell him to truth. And also ask him about what he will do with his ex.

Answer 10

You snooped, at least have the decency to admit to it. Now you know what you hoped not to know. Confess to your bf that you snooped and you know what he's been up to. If he wants her so badly, oblige him by leaving. And next time, don't snoop.