why are you yelling?
2007-01-08 01:39:25 · 17 answers · asked by lilmama 4 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Selective hearing (they only want to hear what they wanna hear)
2007-01-08 01:41:28 · answer #1 · answered by ஐ♥Julian'sMommy♥ஐ 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I have had this discussion with my kids because they have actually asked "Mommy, why do you yell so much?" I point out to them that I asked in my nice Mommy voice 4 times to pick up their toys, 8 times to stop jumpin on the couch and at least a dozen to stop whining. None of these things were taken care of until I screamed each of them exactly once. I tell them that they, yes they, are in control of whether or not I yell. If they don't like the yelling (and I sure don't) they need to listen. It all comes down to listening. SOme days it works great, others I am yelling all day long, but things do get done!
2007-01-08 09:52:34 · answer #2 · answered by imoffmynut 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The same reason an adult would. If an adult yelled at you wouldn't you wonder why or be upset? You have to learn how to talk in order to get to your children. Get down on their level. Speak in a firm but kind voice. Tell them their behavior is not acceptable. As a child and with my own parenting experience, kids respond to that more then yelling or talking in a "normal voice."
2007-01-08 09:44:58 · answer #3 · answered by .vato. 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Try not yelling but make it expensive to not hear you. While my girls were growing up I made it a practice to only tell them to do something once. If they didn't do it I dealt with it as if they disobeyed me. Their hearing improved remarkably.
A few abrupt solutions like cleaning their room for them by putting everything on the floor in garbage bags tends to get their attention far faster than yelling does. The lessons stick longer too.
2007-01-08 09:49:35 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It does really come down to selective hearing!!!! My 2 year old is alreay picking this up from my 7 year old. YAY for me. When they look at you when you finally yell (at least for me) i do get the look but its wow moms putting her foot down i better get my butt doing what i am suppose to do. It all depends on what you do with the yelling, like spanking cause then they wont listen to the yell they will be more afraid of your hand. (not something i endorce) Every mom yells at sometime!!! These are the times that we will remember and be able to tell the stories when they are older and hope their children do it to them LOL really!!
2007-01-08 09:51:30 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
They're used to you yelling if its important, so they don't hear your normal voice anymore. Try whispering or just let them have the consequences (as long as it's not dangerous) so they learn from them and you can stop yelling.
2007-01-08 20:45:52 · answer #6 · answered by Shrieking Panda 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's selective hearing - and it happens a lot. But yelling to get their attention just teaches them to yell right back...
There are lots of other ways to demand their attention - turn of the t.v. program they're watching, take away the toy they're playing with, tell them no dessert or treat, etc.
2007-01-08 10:33:17 · answer #7 · answered by chicchick 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I found that they didn't take me seriously until I yelled at them and I was tired of it. Try talking to them in a normal tone ("Please clean up. It's time for dinner", for example) and, if they don't respond, punish them (Time out, go to your room, take away a privilege for the night, whatever works on your kids) before having to resort to yelling. They'll learn that you don't have to yell to prove that you are serious. It works!
2007-01-08 10:20:12 · answer #8 · answered by Shelley L 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Are the kids used to being given direction by someone yelling?
Another way to get their attention is to look them in the face and ask them a direct question,or give them a directive,even get down to their level if needed.[depending on the age]
The kids also may think the direction and or question is not for them if theyre name is not used.
2007-01-08 10:07:07 · answer #9 · answered by lisa m 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
well...im a 14 y.o kid and i can tell you that kids hear just when they like to...if someone talks to a kid in a nice way the dont care and they think ppl talk rubbish:) but if u yell at them they feel a lil bit more scared and they'll pay attention
2007-01-08 10:12:26 · answer #10 · answered by vladutz 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Try getting their attention first. If you yell from across the room and they're active in something you might have to go to where they are and get their attention. Adults do the same thing sometimes too. Try touching them gently to get their attention or going over next to them or in front of them. It's all about Communication.
2007-01-08 09:55:00 · answer #11 · answered by mayandkayne 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋