Why cant i get over my ex? Im fine going out with new people and having a good time with my friends, but then when I see my ex or talk to him I get upset. Im fine talking about him and Im even ok with him having a new girlfriend as I have a new boyfriend. He treated me like crap when we were together and I know we are better off apart, but I still end up getting upset when talk or see him which makes me annoyed at myself which makes me more upset, how can I stop this from happening as we have both agreed to be mates as we were together for 2 years.
2007-01-08 00:12:06 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Give yourself a break, there is no set time to when you finally get over someone. You obviously still care for him as you have decided to be friends. Perhaps youre crying at what could have been, you realised you werent right for eachother and it couldnt work but that doesnt make it easier to bear. Seeing him reminds you of what you have lost and can never have. You care about him and you want him to be happy so you dont mind the new girlfriend, just because you dont want him as a boyfriend anymore doesnt mean your feelings automatically switch off. It took me 2 years to get over my ex, we were good friends but we were no good as a couple. I think this made it harder because there wasnt a big horrible split, we stayed friends and when i saw him a felt so lost inside and it really hurt knowing how much i loved him yet couldnt have him. Let yourself grieve and accept that the way you feel is ok, you sound like you are getting on with your life and you will put this behind you i promise. Me and my ex are still good mates and it doesnt hurt anymore, i am pleased we stayed friends. Good luck x
2007-01-08 00:25:34 · answer #1 · answered by British*Bird 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I went through the same thing with ny ex during the summer we were together 6 years and have a son together so i had to see and have contact with him,and i was fine and doing alright until i saw or spoke to him then i`d be heartbroken again.
He`s left me again and yesterday came tocollect some clothes and stuff so looks like i`ll be going through it all again except this time i`m a bit stronger and know what to expect.
I think in your case you may have some unresolved issues with your ex and the reason for your split??
Only time will help i suppose and you dont say how long ago you split,maybe your feelings and emotions are still abit raw concerning your ex.I know mine are,like you my ex also treated me like total crap and promised he`d sort him self out and we`d be a proper family second time round but nothing changed he`d be out for nights at a time doing god knows what and i`d be left at home with our son.
Sorry for the story here!!
Be hapy and look forward to your future with your new bf.I envy you!! xx
2007-01-08 08:23:47 · answer #2 · answered by onlyme 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think crying makes you feel better,after a break-up....don't worry about how long it takes you to get over your ex...am sure your current guy won't mind giving you some time to get over your previous guy...it's only right for you to cry because possibly you lost a part of you which was seriously attached to your ex before you broke up...you are probably also crying because you feel you could have changed or done something during your relationship when he was treating you unfairly...now that you're friends you should let him know that you didn't like what he did to you when you were together...i think you'll heal faster that way....but if you don't feel comfortable talking to him about your past relationship with him,just keep it to yourself,the last thing you want is for him to think that he had such an impact in your life that you are still crying over him....hope you find a way of getting over him even if it takes you the next 2 years....good luck girl
2007-01-08 13:19:14 · answer #3 · answered by maverick 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
U clearly arnt over the break up as u get upset wen u see him, the best thing to do is spend as much time with ur new boyfriend and friends this will take ur mind off him and wen u see him out jus regard him as sum1 whos jus there, say hello ow r u n woteva but afta that completely forget u saw him and carry on with whoever u was with and not think about him. eventually u will not care wot he does nemore or wen u see him with his new girlfriend, it will get better i suppose it jus takes time. xx
2007-01-08 08:17:47 · answer #4 · answered by Kimmy xx 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you are still grieving and coming to terms with the ending of your previous relationship. Maybe you have not been ready to deal with the ending of your relationship. Now you are with someone who treats you with the respect you deserve and very opposite to the way your ex treated you! You are with someone who will give you the support you need to be able to deal with and let go of your previous relationship!
2007-01-08 08:30:05 · answer #5 · answered by michelle_in_aus2003 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I cried for the best part of a year when I split up with my boyfriend of two years.
There's no simple answer - it just takes time.
Unfortunately most people won't admit to taking that long to get over a partner, so they make you feel like you're alone
2007-01-08 08:15:43 · answer #6 · answered by Natalie B 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
unfortunately natalie b is right - it just takes time. the more time you spend with friends and the new boyf the easier it will become. just be careful you don't lose your current fella over it like i nearly did. i didn't tell my ex for 3 months that i was going out with my new boyf and he got really upset as he thought that he didn't mean anything to me. leave him in the past and look forward to your future.
2007-01-08 08:22:27 · answer #7 · answered by sunshine 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You dont say how long ago you guys broke up. It takes time to get over a relationship. Try not to see him very often for right now. Did you guys have closure on your relationship? Maybe you need that.
2007-01-08 08:17:25 · answer #8 · answered by lmjones_2005 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
On my own opinion friends can be lovers but lovers cannot be friends...For the two of you decide to have their own life cause of differences or whatever reasons you have....so i think talking or seeing to each other will not be a good decision...for me the answer lays on your hand...As you said you have your own life and a new boyfriend why don't you just put your attention on the man of your life now...
No one can help you but yourself with the guidance of God!!!!
2007-01-08 08:31:45 · answer #9 · answered by kimy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
girl....if he treated you like crap when you were with him, then you should be laughing your head off coz someone else has to put up with him and you don't have to take his crap any more....maybe your crying because you miss him butl be happy, don't dwell too much, you have a new boyfriend now...make your life happy with him, forget the past...as time goes on, you'll feel better, time is a great healer....trust me
2007-01-08 08:22:23 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋