males who were sexually abused?

Question

i'd like to read responses from people who are no longer "survivors" of the abuse but are now thriving. i'm 22 and have realized how profound and persistent the repercussions of the abuse have been and i'd like to begin the healing process. to what do you attribute your working through the trauma?

Answer 1

Well I'm not male, but I'm thriving now. I have a wonderful, full life, and I never thought I would.

It is amazing how abuse can touch every aspect of your life, isn't it? You've just taken your first steps in the healing process by realizing how much it affects you. So many people live in denial of that.

For me, working through the trauma included a lot of things. I kind of tackled the problem like there was no tomorrow and had an almost single-mindedness about it. Looking back I probably could have chilled a little. There's no one right way to heal or one magic amount ot time that it takes. And I really didn't like hearing that. So yeah I kinda bulldozed through it. Had it's good and bad points.

I went to therapy. For a long time. And worked on a lot of crap. It was so good to have a person who didn't blame the victim, ya know?

While I was going to therapy she suggested group therapy. And I told her she was nuts. But ya know what? I eventually did decide to go, and it helped so much. It made me feel less alone, and there are some things that are just easier to work through with a group of fellow survivors.

I did need meds for a bit because of depression. I fought that tooth and nail, too. Refused for an entire year. But it really helped. I was on them for a year and that was enough.

I also joined an online group. That was soooo helpful because it's just a group of people struggling through the same stuff, that you can access any time. I could shoot off an email at 2 am and it didn't matter. Someone was online and reading it.

On a more personal level I did a lot of journaling, because there were just some things that I couldn't bring myself to talk about with other people. It was cathartic. I also started taking better care of myself and being nice to myself. Especially while you're doing the really heavy healing stuff you get so emotionally and physically tired. So being kind to myself helped with that. I also had a small group of trusted friends I could call or hang out with if I was having trouble with no questions asked.

And part of healing for me was becoming active in advocacy and education. I started volunteering at my local rape crisis center. I started doing public speaking about my own experiences. For me, doing something so that my experience helped other people helped me to heal.

I also did a ton of reading. Online and in books. By doing that you'll find other people's ways of dealing with this stuff. There is one book in particular I thought of when I read your question. I have never read all of it, but it has been suggested to me by many male survivors. Here's the link:

http://www.amazon.com/Victims-No-Longer-Recovering-Incest/dp/0060973005

Good luck hon. You'll be just fine, I know it!

Answer 2

Epidemiology1: women folk: 16.8% , adult men: 7.9% type of substantiated or indicated cases has decreased by way of 40-one% contained in the time period of 1992 to 2000. chance Factors4: Age: occurrence of kid sexual abuse will advance with age 0-3 y/o: 10% of victims 4-7 y/o: 28.4% of victims 8-11 y/o: 25% of victims 12 and older: 35.9% of victims Gender: 2.5-3:a million woman predominance 25% of victims are male Disabilities: chance higher for those with actual disabilities, fantastically those that impair the toddler’s perceived credibility: blindness, deafness, and psychological retardation Gender result: boys are over represented between sexually abused little ones in evaluation to sexually abused little ones without disabilities kinfolk Constellation: Absence of one or both father and mom is a chance ingredient Presence of stepfather in homestead doubles the chance for women folk ================= because boys account for in consumer-friendly words 25% of the cases, so that you'll listen about them about seventy 5% a lot less.

Answer 3

I am 41 and am no where nearing "thriving" after growing up with a mother who was emotionally incestuous with me, treating me as if I were her emotional partner instead of my cold father.
Society doesn't take kindly to men who admit to sexual abuse.
That's an advantage women have, the damn b*tches

Answer 4

just hate sex,that what works for me l see the world as a bunch of perverts.