Okay , so I'm 20 years old and starting college, I've been married for a little over a year now. We've had a hard time coming up with tuition, and what we're doing is breaking it down into payments and paying the school out. My parents refused to pay for my college, saying I wasn't their responsibility anymore. I thought they should pay for it or atleast help me out some. What do you think?
2007-01-07 16:47:45 · 28 answers · asked by Wonderious 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Even if you weren't married it's not the parents responsibility to pay for college. I think it will make you work harder in school when you are paying for it yourself. You can be proud of yourself for taking charge of your life. Self reliance is a skill so many are lacking, you'll be ahead of the game when you graduate. It would be wonderful if your parents could help you out with your other bills while you are going to school but maybe they just can't afford it. Perhaps they could give you an interest free loan?
2007-01-07 16:57:59 · answer #1 · answered by LO! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I were your parent and was willing to pay your tuition if you were not married then I would help you now. I would want you to follow your dreams and become everything you can. Did they put out a lot of money for your wedding? Maybe they can't afford to help you now. Think about the reasons and if it is just that you are married and you are no longer their "responsibility" then speak with them again in a quiet, reasonable way. Maybe they could give you a "no interest" loan with a long time to pay it off. Otherwise, you should be able to get financial aid, student loan, maybe a grant or scholarship (lots of reasons for grant and scholarship monies). Do your research and you will find help. Those above my answer that say you shouldn't have gotten married so young or that your parents do not have an obligation are correct but you are married and you need help. I hope it works for you because I like the fact that you want to better yourself and hopefull, get a career of your choice. Good luck.
2007-01-08 00:55:12 · answer #2 · answered by Santa's Elf 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends on what the situation was before you got married. Were your parents always not going to be able to help out or did it change because you got married? I think if they changed their mind due to the marriage they are the ones being unreasonable.
My viewpoint on life is that a parent's job is to make sure their child has the best chance in life and it is thier responsability to put their children through college. They have 18+ years to figure out a way to afford college tuition and I think its sad that many parents have washed their hands of it and don't see the importance of a college education and not puting your children in debt to do so. I'm not saying every parent should pay for Harvard but they need to be able to support a child to go to state or community college. Its not like you want your parents to support your car payment, this is education we are talking about. It is true that you and your husband are responsible for yourselves now but education and parenting are always the parent's responsibility and that never ends, even if you are 80 years old.
Finally it also depends on your parents' financial situation. If they can afford to pay it then ask them for a loan or to help out and make one of your payments or even just pay for your textbooks. If the truely can't afford to pay some then maybe they can help you fill out some forms or find grants or finiancial aide. If you involve them in the process and they can see how important education is to you and how serious you are about going to college they may soften up a bit. Talk to them about what your goals are and what you hope to accomplish in college and in your career. If I was a parent I'd be happy to send a mature responsible adult to college and not some 18 year old who is going to party all the time and not study. Good luck!
2007-01-08 01:26:23 · answer #3 · answered by tigervixxxen 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your parents should not help your pay for your tuition. That is now your responsibility. If you and your husband are working, you should do what it takes to pay for it, otherwise, wait a little longer and save some money to start college so you can pay for it.
Remember you are now married, you two can work through this together, not with the help of your parents.
2007-01-08 00:54:12 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I realize I don't have all the facts but I'm just basing my opinion on what you have said. But if I was one of your parents, knowing that you are young and saw that you and your husband were struggling to pay for your tuition, I would definitely help (if I could afford it). By going to college you are trying to advance yourself in knowledge and in your career.
You said your parents REFUSED to pay for your college - were they possibly upset that you got married at such a young age?
But you also said you thought they SHOULD pay for it or they SHOULD help out. You did get married and can't expect them to be your provider any more.
Maybe if you just asked them for some help, that you and your husband are struggling, that you are trying to better yourself.
See if you can get a loan from them stating that you will repay them X number of months after you graduate and the amount of your monthly repay to them will be based on your income.
Also, go to the financial aid person at your college. There are all kinds of grants, loans, etc. out there just for assisting college students.
Good luck!!
2007-01-08 01:25:13 · answer #5 · answered by Oenophile... (Lynn) 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry and I don't mean this rudely. If your not ready to grow up and and take care of yourself you shouldn't have gotten married.
My parents aren't wealthy and I have been living supporting myself and my child and I am happily married. Never in a million years would I even ask much less expect my parents to pay for my college. Maybe I would have expected more help from them if I was still their dependant or if they had loads of money to blow out.
You can always go for a loan or apply for grants. Good Luck!
2007-01-08 00:53:37 · answer #6 · answered by Jessica P 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All parents are different. I will help my kids if I can when the time comes. If I can't well, I guess that's why I push them so hard now. But from the sounds of it doesn't really matter what we think, they already made the decision.
Have you tried for a pelgrant, or taking out student loans. Those might be more realistic options for you.
2007-01-08 00:50:57 · answer #7 · answered by hthr_1974 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some parents think once you are 18 you are totally on your own, I plan on paying for both of my kids to go to college. I see that as my responsibility. But that's just me. Don't get down about it, stay in college and show them you don't need their help.
2007-01-08 01:20:16 · answer #8 · answered by honeybear 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YOU ARE MARRIED.... Your parents are done paying for you.. And even if you were not married you are 20 years old and your parent's are no longer responsible for you....It is time to grow up and see the real world.
2007-01-08 00:50:03 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I guess your parents think your old enough to provide for yourself and thats what they want you to do.
The nice thing for them to do is to help out but not all parents are the same and pay for it cause some do and some dont.
but if I had a a daughter or what ever... I would help just because i WANT my child to be successful and Im willing to like be there and support the child if they needed me type thing
2007-01-08 00:52:06 · answer #10 · answered by beth 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋