my husband of 6yrs left me and our 3yr old for an old high school gf?

Question

ok i'm not a perfect wife and john has been a perfect husband and father except for his cheating."sue" and old gf emailed john last spring he told her he was married with a child.i'm not sure what happened after that but last fall he told me a he had cheated on me again with sue and was leaving me.he told me he was not seeing her anymore but a week after he left i went to her house late and sure enough he was there.when i calmly went to the door and asked john to come out to talk he refused,sue was screaming/swearing like a truck driver(she put a restraining order on me after that)i gave up and left.sue has been in and out of johns life for the last 15 yrs.why does he keep going back to her but never stays with her?i just found out from his sister john is cheating on sue with a coworker but she does not know.john has been great paying child support(gives me more than he has too) and seeing his child.why would a great dad/person cheat so much on someone they say they love?

this is not the 1st time he cheated on me in our marrage,2yrs ago he cheated with a friend at work

Answer 1

NO he's not the perfect husband! If he was, you wouldnt be here asking this question sweety.Secondly, any man that cheats isnt worth a dime. If he dosent know what he has, then he needs to LOSE it all to figure it out! Shut him out.Dont let him come back. Its the only way he's going to learn.If he wants to go with the homewreckin' hoe then let him.He'll realise sooner or later that what he had was good. A man like that dont deserve a good woman.He keeps goin back to ''sue'' because he wants more then one woman! He dosent want to commit. He'll come back to you and then go to her ...aint life sweet like that? You get the best of both sides of the fields! You have a wife that cleans the house..cooks...takes care of the kids..then you have a girlfriend! One who fu*ks ya....no strings attached..doesn't ask you where you've been...doesn't care.Do you see where im comin from? He knows you'll try and win his heart over.A man like that will always be like that, sweety.What you need to do is move on with your life.He aint givin you nothing worth staying anyway! Give your baby a good future and take care of YOU.You dont deserve to get treated like that,no woman does. Let sue deal with his bullshyt! Recieve child support and just leave John out in the cold! He'll regret it later on in life. Best of wishes and good luck! Dont put yourself down for any man.

Answer 2

Geeez you're taking a lengthy time period to assert next to no longer some thing, hon. the guy has been dishonest on you for the packed consisting of your marriage and also you're nonetheless there?????? What the f(success) are you questioning???? Why are you nonetheless there? Do you want being a door mat?? Hon you may extremely love discomfort, enormous time. i wager your question is how can an staggering guy be one of those rat? And the reply is: Who he's and what you pick him to be basically are not an identical. it really is often stated that individuals see what they pick to work out, and this tale is for particular adequate a accurate celebration of it. he's a rat, hon: stay in case you want that style of remedy, because it will be all you receives from this guy, or go away, freshen up your act, get your self jointly, get some counseling, get a pastime, get your self contained in the hands of an staggering beautician, have your hair and makeup carried out, get some polish on those difficult edges, and finally end up a guy worth you. life is a techniques too short to spend it in hassles, dishonest husbands, his raunchy woman associates and the dramatic scenes. Marriage could be Admiration, recognize, pastime and believe. You ain't were given nuttin' like that with this dude!!!!!!!! you have not any courting, only a trouble, hon. Get right into some consultation of a few counseling to be sure why you settle for this habit.... life could be relaxing, no longer what you've....

Answer 3

Because some men (and women) can't get enough. Maybe he's a sexaholic. Or he isn't adult enough to settle down with just one person. You are better off without him. Kudos to him for being a good father. But as a husband he's a total scum bag. I kicked my husband out when I found out he was cheating and I had 2 small babies at the time and no job. But you know what? I'm soo much better off now! He's immature and he'll get what's coming to him. Good luck girl.

Answer 4

Well do you kno of any rough childhood memories that he's had.... it may b a depserate need for a attention and well maybe thte only way he can love is to love some1 the way he loves his child... without marrying him or going out with him or her u kno that he can't be tied down for certain reasons that maybe no 1 can understand but if he left u i think that u need to find urself a new husband i mean don't completely forget abt him but handle this a mature way and just let him do wat he feels and if he comes to you for advice or n e thing treat him like a friend not ur Xhusband OK... u can't change him... only he can do that and well i hope everything worx out OK for u

Answer 5

John is one of those kinds of people who is basically not happy with his own life and is looking for the greener grass in a futile attempt to change his feelings rather than tending the grass he already has and making his life more like how he wants it. He also doesn't really know how to love in a mature way that is beneficial to himself and his partner, obviously. What he considers to be "love" is that intitial "high" one gets at the beginning of a relationship. Perhaps he also cannot completely commit, for whatever reason, perhaps fear of abandonment. His fears don't particularly make him a bad person, but the way he acts on his fears is uncool. I feel sorry for him. He reminds me of another chronic cheater I once knew. But he wont change until he is ready to, for himself and no one else. Nothing anyone else can say or do can make him be ready. He has to be sick of living his life that way and be willing to acknowledge his own faults and work on changing his ways.

Answer 6

thats a really interesting story. sounds to me that this sue person obviously made some kinda impact on his life that he misses so he just goes back to her every now and then.

as for you, thats a diff story. he has a kid and a marriage of 6 years with you.......interesting.

i guess the "guys are pigs" quote is true once again

Answer 7

Sounds like he's in love with being in love. In that I mean that he's hooked on the emotion of new love and keeps on renewing it with Sue and co-worker. Be your turn again soon. If you want that, fine, but if you don't, time to give him the flick.