is this abuse?

Question

my dad gives me a choice of weather he can be
rude or scream and i say rude and doesn't try to comfort me but yet he feeds me and gives me things he acts like a child all he seems to do is put me down please help and he says i have a big trap when i tell somebody

Answer 1

its not abuse its just a bad father

Answer 2

From what you tell me, it seems to be verbal abuse. Try writing a letter to him and explain nicely haw it makes you feel. If you are attending school, getting good grades, and are not in trouble the say all these things and ask why since you love each other, can't you be civil to each other. He may have personality problems that prevent his having a non confrontational relationship. If a letter doesn't help talk to a counselor or some older person tou trust. I did not love my mother and finally figured out why and no longer fely quilty saying it. But try, maybe he is under stress you dont know about and say that in your letter. If he doesn't respond well to a non accusatory letter, then seek some one else to take to and don't lose your self esteem. If you were not a goood, caring person, I feel you would not have written this question. Good luck, sweetheart.

Answer 3

As a child abuse social worker I would need a little bit more information. With what you are providing it would not be considered abuse or neglect by state standard levels. On the other hand there is parenting styles that are not as beneficial for the children.

I would try talking to the school counselor and letting all of your feelings out. If you are asking this question it has to be getting to you and the counselors are there to listen.

Answer 4

If a parent is rude to you, constantly puts you down, and doesn't give any kind of support, I would say that's a form of emotional abuse. Your dad needs counselling, and you might feel better if you talked with someone as well. Once you turn 18 you can legally move out on your own if you wish to.

Answer 5

im sure he doesnt act that way for no reason and a little more detailed would be a lot better if you need help. Truly if you want respect from someone you have to treat them with respect if you act nice, and do what your told im sure your dad will treat you well, 90 percent of parents just want to see their kids succeed and grow up and be succesful good people and the other 10 percent are child molesters, abusers, and just ******* if he's not that 10 percent then your ok

Answer 6

Your father should never give you a choice of discipline. He is the parent and should behave like one and figure a good discipline to teach you and make you learn from your mistakes.Now I know I am no one to criticize but I do have kids (3 boys to be exact) and as a parent I cannot ask my boys on I should and what I should say. What is wrong with him? And to put you down is doing you harms, not good, can't he see that. You really need to talk to him. That is abuse. Please talk to him before anything. That will do more than any of us can do here.

Thank You :-)

Answer 7

What is the choice that your dad gives you??? ?
are you saying that your dad scream at you but he feeds you and give you things and he acts like child....
he yell at you so much asking to get counseling, is hard to live with someone who is yelling at you all the time ( i have that for experience) and this is nothing to do with all the food he gives you and him acting like a child.

Answer 8

Yes, this is mental and verbal abuse. When you are grown up, you will always have these statements in your head and you won't be able to move forward because you were never,"Good Enough". Do you have a counselor to talk to or move in with a friend.

Answer 9

Its sad, but I went through the same thing when I was younger...the sad part is that it still follows me YEARS later! My parents would always put me down and nothing was ever good enough. So now, at the age of 23, I feel like whatever I do is just not good enough. I would go to counseling...even a school counselor would be good.

Answer 10

Well, of course that's abuse.
He feeds you. Great, big deal! It's his duty. He would go to jail if he didn't (that's if you're a minor).
The only consolation you can get is that one day you'll be out of there, and it's his problem to be an abusive weirdo, not yours.
Learn to be nicer for your kids, when you'll have some, and not to repeat the cycle of abuse.

Answer 11

It's definitely verbal abuse. You need to tell someone you trust, like a teacher or something. It's probably the only way you'll get any help b/c we don't know you personally. Just tell someone you trust and get advice from them or even go to the police if it gets physical.