she's 18 and he's 19. they'd been going out for a year. they were both virgins and both christians, both go to a christian college too. they were engaged. then one day i think it sorta just happened. she had always told me that she was going to b a virgin until her honeymoon, but she didn't live up to that did she? anyway, he dumped her like a month or so after that. so she loved him, i don't know if he loved her but i didn't really know him, so yea....now she's trying to get over him and has started dating but tells me she going to do NOTHING until marriage this time. not even kiss. WHAT!? do u htink she'll stick to it? when i say she's a christian i'm not too sure if it's a popularity thing or what. she always lies, non-stop! she told me she was pregnant from it then a few days she had a miscarriage....i don't know what to believe but anyway, i toally understand about the no sex thing, but kissing and cuddling...what!? do u think she's just saying that
2007-01-07 11:17:17 · 14 answers · asked by Emily 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
well, i've always stuck by her no matter what she says....
2007-01-07 11:29:16 · update #1
yea maybe i am slightly bitter towards her and maybe i am putting up a front but i don't think i'll b able to do anymore than this. she's done alot of things to hurt me in the past.
2007-01-07 11:35:16 · update #2
Tell her welcome to the real world.
2007-01-07 11:18:44 · answer #1 · answered by atomicseptic 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
We can't tell you why she says what she says. It may be true but then she could just be crying out for attention.
I think what you need to focus on is your bitterness toward her.
For example, "she had always told me that she was going to b a virgin until her honeymoon, but she didn't live up to that did she?"
It appears to me that you are not there for her when she needs you to be, just by this statement. It seems as though you may put up a front of being caring and supportive but you're actually angry. Why?
One thing that has been a big deal with me is that my 'friends' wouldn't be there when I was going through things yet I was there for them during all of their hard times. I would offer them help and encouragement.
Your friend has been through a bad experience. She gave her virginity away and is left with nothing but regrets. She wants to try to live a pure life again, one where she waits for marriage. Will she do this? It's hard to say. But it's not your place to judge her. It's your place to offer her support and comfort, to believe in her and to help her, to be a FRIEND.
Can you do this? That is the question you should be asking yourself because if you can't be a true friend to her, maybe you should end your friendship before one of you is truly worse off due to it.
2007-01-07 11:25:13 · answer #2 · answered by DragonWrites the Fire Faery 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would stick by her if it was me . You should also get to know what really happened by talking to all that are involved. I really feel for your friend. The pressure to have premarital sex these days is amazing. I am a virgin and staying that way till marriage but im way older then both of you so i can at least understand what your both going through. Try to have a heart to heart talk with her about all this. Its not easy staying a virgin at ur age and its only going to get tougher as u get older(trust me on this)
2007-01-08 06:44:01 · answer #3 · answered by virgin 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is simply hurt by the fact that she has been dumped. In time this pain will go away and she will change her mind. As for the pregnancy and subsequent miscarriage, since you are not a doctor nor did you witness it there is no way you could possible know if what she said was true or not and it's pretty crass to judge her on something you don't know.
2007-01-07 11:21:12 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
She sounds like she's in a lot of pain right now.
If I were you, I'd listen to her without looking too disbelieving. In a few weeks she'll probably think twice about things and decide not to follow through...but if you've been a pain in the *** about it the whole time, she may not want to admit it. Or stay friends with you! Being supportive is the best route.
Good luck and God bless.
2007-01-07 11:22:13 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is probably really hurt right now, since it seemed that she was dumped by a guy soon after she slept with him, as if he was waiting to get some, and as soon as he did she was history. So for now, just be there as a friend for her, it may take some time for her to trust someone again, and that's OK.
2007-01-07 11:21:42 · answer #6 · answered by artist-oranit.com. 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think she is really hurt and is probably tiring to get some attention with the lies just try to talk to her and be a Friend because she will need you and maybe you will be the one that she can turn to.
2007-01-07 11:24:06 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Too bad women always learn after the fact. Women fall for any line. Theres about 1000 questions a week in here from women who want to know if he loves her, well they would easily know that if they weren't giving it away for free and waited til marriage. Only somone who loves you would be willing to wait, the rest just want the sex.
Women are as dumb as doornails
2007-01-07 11:21:50 · answer #8 · answered by Dovahkiin 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
lol you kind of think he's after that the whole time lol dumped right after too
bad experience
it's not men's fault 100 percent
so she should not say she will never kiss again
i see it as 50 50
she's also at fault because she didnt' keep her promise of staying virgin
she should move on it's only a mistake
everyone makes one
2007-01-07 11:20:07 · answer #9 · answered by Evermore 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She may just be saying it, maybe she thinks she's not going to but she will if she finds someone she likes.
2007-01-07 11:21:23 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Shes fibbing! Shes just upset cause th other guy.
2007-01-07 11:19:58 · answer #11 · answered by fun fun fun .... you know the rest 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋