Help me please?

Question

I'm doing a particularly demanding masters course and it looks like i'm going to have difficulty passing it. it's causing me to feel incredibly stressed and depressed and have low self -esteem issues. and i'm also having trouble getting to sleep at night. i've been in psychotherapy for the last 2 months but it doesn't seem to be helping so much as yet. also an added pressure of my girlfriend being in a foreign country at the moment. i'm planning to go over there to live with her after the course but failing may jeopardise this. i just need help to deal with this pressure!

Answer 1

Dump the psychotherapy, that's never going to help.

Stress happens. It saps your physical strength as well as your mental strength, but being physically wiped has a mental effect as well, so it tends to compound.

Are you drinking a lot of coffee? Stop! Caffeine stays in the system for over 10 hours and if you drink it in large quantities and late in the day it will stop you sleeping -- then you think you have to take more to stay awake. Nasty cycle.

So get your body sorted first. Go to a nutritionist.

That's the best I can suggest here, if you want more practical help you can contact me. I'll be able to find a volunteer in your area who can give you practical help.

Steve

Answer 2

You should feel better and try telling yourself that you CAN do the masters course. 'Cuz how are you gonna do something while moping about telling yourself you'll fail? You should try to organize your time better like do the less important stuff that you're good at first quickly then get a lot of time to do the hard important stuff. Try to get a lot of sleep. IIt gets off a load of stress and helps your brain circulate faster. If you don't your brain might blank out on stuff you know.Maybe you can try asking someone who knows the stuff in the course well to help you with the stuff in the course a little till you you understand the things. Then when you know you won't feel as much stress.

Sorry if this advice sucks.

Answer 3

I have the same problem...I can never fall asleep. What I usually do is make sure that I don't watch tv, use the computer, do homework, ect...for atleast an hour before I go to bed. During this time, take a shower, relax, and read a book or listen to music (boring books or songs work the best to make you tired). Continue with your psychotherapy and try talking to your girlfriend over the phone. Tell her how you are feeling. Use the weekend or days you have off to relax. Try not to focus on your studies for atleast 1 day a week, and relax!

Answer 4

pick yr self up, pull yr self 2gether, all common answers to feeling down, and all rubbish. We are individuals who have and create our own coping mechanisms. It appears at the minute you have lost these, but you wont have forgotten them. It is important to talk to people, if someone asks if you are ok, tell the truth we dont always have to say yes just because every1 else does, you will be amazed just how much better you feel. Yr studies sound truely important to u, again talk to yr peers about yr fears u may discover yr not the only one. It is hard to come up from a position that feels so low, but it is possible, time and patience are the most vital things. And being honest about how you feel, never hide how u are truely feeling. Life is difficult but some how we manage to get through it. I wish you luck, and hope you allow yourself to see the light at the end of the tunnel.
oh and if your psychotherapy appears not to helping after a yr it may be a good idea to discuss this and possibly consider that some form of theropy may be more useful.

Answer 5

You can succeed and you will succeed! You have the ultimate thing to work for-going to live with your girlfriend! See it as an exciting challenge with great rewards at the end, work your a.r.s.e off now and think about the great times to be had when this is all done and dusted, will be sooner than you know! Im currently in my final year of uni and trying (struggling) with starting my dissertation, but im doing my best to concentrate on the great achievement when it is finished and all the free time to be had!..You need to take your mind off of your masters sometimes as you're brain needs some chill time too. Set yourself certain amounts to do a day and create a timetable, where you can tick off the days of how much time you have left. Include breaks in this and other activities to give you a break! Eat foods that make you happy, I know avocardos and fruit contain happy chemicals-which you need and brain food like porridge and lots of chocolate for the sugar! You cant sleep as your brain is still in work mode, either read something (a mag or book) or watch TV to wind you down and also have a bath before bed for that extra bit of relaxation. Good luck with it, you can do it, remember see it as exciting with great rewards to work for!

Answer 6

Firstly, if the theray isn't helping chnage! I know of a good therapist in Clapham area if that's near you.
Also, don't put so much stress on ur self reagrding the masters. it's just an exam. Treat it like any challenge. You can do it if you believe you can.
also,take a good multi-vitamin(not the commercial ones but from a health shop, this site has some also), maybe take magnesium in the mornings (on empty stomach) & 5HTP to make you stronger, & calmer. Also have you tried healing? it'll really help you relax & is very good, this is the site if u r interested (please type in ur postcode for nearest centre):
(they work on donations only):

http://www.nfsh.org.uk/component/option,com_wrapper/Itemid,70/

Most mportant, don't allow urself to be negative, eg don't say I cannot do it, say I can, I am able etc. Be positive. You can do it!

Answer 7

You need to takle the stress issues first. The stress and depressive symptons may be directly related to the course you are taking. Many people in your situation can be helped by a change in lifestyle, something as simple as getting more organised with all aspects of the masters maybe.

Perhaps stress can be relieved by seeking help with your course itself, finding ways to relax etc. You need a healthy balance of time for yourself (i.e relaxation) and study/course related. Try looking at things in a more optimistic and positive light- you'd be surprised at what a difference that can make! Stress can hugely affect your ability to study, so try and focus on the course instead of worrying what may happen if you fail.

The self-esteem issues sound as though they could be a lot more deep-rooted. This can be explored with your psychotherapist... depending on what kind of psychotherapy you're having (e.g psychoanalytical atc) the journey can be long, but worth it!

Try and separate different aspects of your life, so you can be in "social mode", "study mode" etc at appropriate times... it will help when you will have to be in a more retrospective mood for psychotherapy aswell. Stress can be triggered and worsoned by different aspects of your life fusing together and become confusing.

Good Luck with everything :-)
Remember--- PMA--- Positive Mental Attitude!!!

Answer 8

You can only do what you can do.... walk be4 you can run
you are just causing yourself all these frustrations because you want to achieve more than what you can do
you may be able to achieve your target but within a more extense period of time

in other words... slow down and be milder to yourself

Answer 9

"Don’t worry about anything; instead, talk to Jesus about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand"

Answer 10

Hi buddy....text message me right now and I will chat with you.

Jody