Custody case in pa?

Question

i am a mother of 4 boys ages now are 18 he has graduated and moved out on his own...then i have a 16 yr old son soon to be 17 then i have a 14 yr old son soon to be 15 then a 13 yr old son soon to be 14.

my ex left us back in nov 1996 i had the children in my custody ever since....when he left i told him i was keeping custody of the boys so he told me fine and then i said about going for child support he told me if i did that then he would give up all his rights to the boys i didnt know the law so i thought he could then so i said fine cause i didnt want to be the blame for him not being in his kids life so i asked him what he could afford he said 50 aweek so he paid that when he did for 1/2 yrs till may 2006 i sued him for child support then he turned around and sued me for full custody ....none of our sons wants to live with him .

he left his 2nd wife back in 2004 she was 5 months pregnant and they also have a 2 yr old son at that time .he went to a bar and never went home ...he left her for his new gf.

well they live in a 3 bedroom well the gf has a son and a daughter the son is 10 the little girl is 6 they sleep in the same room the other women is a stranger she is handicapped living in the 3rd bedroom he has no rooms for my sons they sleep on the floor and couches .

i have to go by the custody agreement made from 1997 when he left ,the kids were toddlers they do not want this set up no more .
i have legal services tellin me i can not change this arrangement cause he is sueing me for full custody.

well we went to a modified hearing we were both ordered to pay 1050 i paid he didnt he asked the judge to give him 6 months to come up with it which will take us to april 2007 ..since then he had moved from his 2 bedroom in new phila .to a three bedroom four blocks from where we live the boys asked me to do something about the visitation they only want to see him now on a saturday from like 9 to 6pm .

i am being told by alot of ppl the kids will get to talk to the judge for my ex is telling the boys he has already won and they will be living with him and they have no choice?


what do you think ? is it true?

Answer 1

First of all, they are all at an age where they can testify (and is considered by the court) as to what their own wishes are where they want to be.

i would go for child support too. even a lousy $50 bucks, just because hes such a dirtbag...

i am sorry you have to go through all of this; your kids going through it and you have a front row seat to it.

1) contact your local Legal Aid Office. they are in every state and most counties. they go on a sliding scale, so its free to most. look in your phone book, call the county court clerks office or call your states Bar Assoc for the number.

good Lord, why are men such bungholes?
mom of 4

http://www.wantedposters.com/deadbeats_usa_a_to_f.htm
http://www.deadbeatjustice.com/list.htm

http://www.divorcelawinfo.com/
http://www.divorcelawinfo.com/calculators.htm
http://www.helpyourselfdivorce.com/child-support-calculators.html
http://www.divorcehq.com/deadbeat.html
http://www.lawchek.com/Library1/_books/domestic/qanda/childsupp.htm
http://www.acf.dhhs.gov/programs/cse/
http://www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/region2/index.html

http://www.supportkids.com/
http://www.singlemoms.org/info/main.htm
http://www.singlemotherresources.com/
http://www.angelfire.com/nj4/njcomputerchick
http://www.parentswithoutpartners.org/chapterfind.asp
http://www.mowaa.org/
http://modestneeds.org/
http://freecycle.org/

Answer 2

Don't let this jerk intimidate you. You should have a lawyer. Check , but in my state a child can live with the parent he chooses when he reaches 14. He has not already won. You would have to be called into court. Get an attorney. Most attorneys will talk to you one time before you hire them. Find one. This will empower you. Don't talk badly about him to your kids. They already know what kind of dad he is. It will only hurt them more for you to bring it up. Good luck.

Answer 3

You should really talk to a lawyer, there are free legal services in Pa, or at least they have you pay what you can afford. I do believe that at the age they are at they have the right to choose who that want to live with threw the courts. I wouldn't trust your ex, I think he is all talk and doesn't know what he is talking about.

Answer 4

I don't think a judge would give him custody first of all.It sounds like he abandon all of you. It doesn't sound like he has a good record with relationships. Judge should be able to talk to the boys and see that they don't want to be with him. they certainly are old enough.

Answer 5

Yes they're old enough to decide for themselves who they want to live with.