I text him at about 9pm and asked him If I could sleep over his house.........no response so I text him again at 9:30pm and said, "If you don't want me to just let me know, it's okay if you don't want me too."..........no response. He was at work so I gave him the benefit of the doubt. I fell asleep and called him at 2:30am and gave him the 3rd degree. He got off work at 12am. I kept asking him why he didn't respond to my text and he said because he didn't get my texts till after he got off work and after work he had a lot of work problems on his mind. Couldn't he have just simply text me back a simple no, not tonight? I gave him a hard time about not responding? Was that a jerk or what?
2007-01-07 10:08:10 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Yes u were.I'm an older woman with alot of relationships under my belt.I'm telling u that u keep this up you'll run him off. Stop and think about it.He worked all day it was late and he probably wanted to go to bed. You need to be more understanding. I know u might be worry he doesn't care about u but men don't show woman they care about them like we do. Men show it with tenderness and making u feel loved when your with him. Plus if u love him u need to learn how to understand him and don't try to change him.It won't work.If he isn't one to text u alot then deal with it.That is if u want to keep him.Good luck
2007-01-07 10:18:28 · answer #1 · answered by sweet_thing_kay04 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Apparently you didn't get it. He was at work, and as he explained to you, he had work problems. I am assuming that when ever he does text you it is because he has time to. You were wrong in giving him the 3rd degree. Why are you asking anyway? Did you fear of him cheating on you...or worried he may have started. Either way, until you have proof there is nothing you can do. Be grateful you have a boyfriend who is working. Just like you said, give him the benefit of the doubt and drop the whole thing. If it happens again, try texting him or calling him at his lunch hour or ask him to call you then. See what he thinks
2007-01-07 10:15:14 · answer #2 · answered by momofatsc 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It really all depends on what kind of relationship this is.
But I do have to admit that you did give him the easy out, not sure why he didn't just take it.
What kind of response would he have gotten from you if he had just said "no not tonight"? If you are in the habit of giving him grief for those kinds of answers, or not taking "no" very well, then he might not have wanted to get into that kind of conversation.
If this is just a casual kind of relationship where you two just sleep together for mutual comfort then he really owes you no explanation and you may have been a little out of line, but if you have an exclusivity contract then I might have been a bit upset myself.
Just remember, you're not married. Neither of you owe the other anything. Most men do not like a hassle. If he usually gets one for turning you down then he was probably just avoiding that. I do think he was slightly inconsiderate but you might want to examine yourself also.
If I were you, I would find a "friend" more in tune to the way you do things. I'm sure there are many sweet men out there who would love a spontaneous phone call including a self-invite for a sleep-over. Try not to be too hard on him or yourself.
2007-01-07 10:19:55 · answer #3 · answered by outdone 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you overeacted a little, but that's okay because we're women and that's what we do. lol Seriously though, you need to have a calm talk with him and let him know it bothers you when he doesn't respond. Guys just sometimes don't get it and it's not that they're being rude, it's just that they don't think like we do. The best thing to do is bring it to his attention in a mature way and then go from there.
2007-01-07 10:17:19 · answer #4 · answered by otbfj 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you were the jerk in this situation. You should have waited and called him around the time he was getting off of work, and asked if you could come over, instead of the whole texting thing...
From experience, texting does not always go through, and I always run into alot of trouble if the phone is turned off (like at work).
Take it easier on your guy...getting off from work at midnight...he may not appreciate getting the third degree from you, and leave you.
2007-01-07 10:14:36 · answer #5 · answered by ndngrlz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you were over reacting. This could cause you some problems in the future. Guys don't like to be checked. Maybe talk about these things before he goes to work. He would appreciate it better. When your working, your mind is not on texting. Say your sorry and take him out to dinner. Stop being pushy or you'll be alone. Very experienced.
2007-01-07 10:15:40 · answer #6 · answered by kayjay 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
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2016-12-28 08:26:53 · answer #7 · answered by hileman 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everyone knows that Women are sensitive and think about stuff that Men know nothing about. Havent you ever heard this?:
The woman is going on and on about her undying love for the man and the man is thinking to himself "I really gotta change the oil in the car".
Just remember...the man is not usually being a jerk to YOU...they are just naturally jerks. So, ya, maybe you should cut your guy a little slack, and then tell him the way you want to be treated. No joke.
2007-01-07 10:16:26 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
okay. he's just not that into you. don't take that the wrong way. all men do this: married, dating, friends. if he's feeling more into you he'll call you. he'll invite YOU over. how can this be achieved? well it's a win-win for you. just don't call, text, im, or e-mail him. i don't care if it takes him days or even a week to get back to you. sooner or later he'll come around to find out why you're not acting interested anymore. do something else with your time while waiting. work on something you've been meaning to do or neglecting. just get him off your mind. be positive about it. be strong. if a woman is constantly showing herself to be interested, believe it or not, the man gets bored with her.
2007-01-07 10:15:41 · answer #9 · answered by erinnkelly 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't want to sound harsh, but it kinda shows you what HIS priorities are. You've got to make him understand (w/out accusing or criticizing) that he is a higher priority to you and see how he responds. If nothing happens, I'd say you've got your answer.
All in all, though, I'd say no, you did not overreact. We have a right to expect a response from someone we are together with.
2007-01-07 10:13:10 · answer #10 · answered by randyken 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋