Is my 3.5 year old daughter behind?

Question

My daughter is 3.5 and I am concerned that she is behind in her speech, numbers and letters. Her grandparents and strangers cannot understand most of what she is saying, I can understand what she says and it upsets me that others cannot. She does not know her numbers or her alphabet yet. I try to work numbers into our daily activities but she is not catching on, she will count like 1,2,3,7,9,10. She does know her colors and animal sounds and she can trace the alphabet but does not know what the letters are. When I try to help her she gets upset with me and just shuts down after a few minutes. What can I do or should I be worried? Is this normal at this age?

Answer 1

Talk to your doctor about her speech and see if he is concerned.

Her counting sounds pretty typical for that age.

Don't push her to learn as she'll just become more resistent. Make it fun! Make a game of it! At this age learning should be about having fun.

Instead of working on ALL the letters, work on ones that will mean something to her. The first letter of her first name.....or write her name for her to trace and work on those letters. Work on what her friends and family start with.

When you go to the store, have her look for certain colors, shapes, letters or numbers around her.

Count the stairs when you go up and down.

Sort toys by color, shape, type or size. Count and see how many are in each pile. Talk about what is more and what is less.

Let her play online at http://www.starfall.com

Get the Leap Frog Letter Factory DVD.

Answer 2

Ask your pediatriton about her speech, buy the Dora ABC game (wal-mart) play it with her daily. Modify the game and instead of picking out the picture lay the letters face up and just have her find the mach as you go through the alphbet, Play with her, take turns and have her help you find the letters, don't lay them down in alphabetical order. You'll know what i am talking about if you get the game. Also get the book "Chicka chicka boom boom". Read this often, and play the game often. She'll start remembering her favorite letters after a while. Teach her what her name looks like, of course she can't read it but she'll recognize it after a while (especially the first letter of her name.) Also, she is young they don't have a very long attention span, so if you get in five minutes great, 15 minutes super, any little bit helps. Keep it stress free, fun and exciting!!!!!!!. She'll catch on, they all do!

Answer 3

Turn on an educational program, let her watch all day if she wants too. ( I hate Barny but kids love him, lol) When YOU work with her and she becomes upset, take a break shes bored or confused. For the most part always make a game out of it. Count her toes (tickle time) and fingers, # your fingers as you do so, ( use 1 say 1, use 2 say 2) and so on. Play teaches so much, and weather you can carry a tune in a bucket or not set all activities to song. Children seem to remember songs more easily. Make it a tune she likes a lot and will respond to. Children are extremely quick studies when what they are learning is FUN. Your doing great keep it up.
http://www.fisher-price.com/us/ms2/preschool-games.asp
This site has some cool ideas for playtime learn time,enjoy.

Answer 4

Get this toy by v-tech. My 3 1/2 year old loves it. It not only teaches the Alphabet but it also teaches you how to write the alphabet. It has a hidden letter game where you have to find the letters in a picture. It also does numbers. It comes with smart pages for tracing and other learning games. It also teaches before and after (ex. what comes after the letter c...) I love playing with it as well. LOL.




I only paid $19.99 for it at Target.

Answer 5

Around age three people should consistentle be able to understand your daughter if they're paying attention to her. Sometimes adults do not give their full attention when a toddler is speaking. They also may not be able to understand all of her words but should get the general idea of what she's saying. She should also be able to sing the ABC's but not necessarily recognize the actual letters. The same with numbers. She should be able to count to ten but not realize that there are four cookies on her plate. The easiest way for her to increase her language skills is for you to constantly be talking to her, singing the abc's, counting, etc. Try to keep it light and fun so she won't be frustrated with learning before she enters school! If she continues to struggle you should check with her pediatrician. He or she will be better able to determine if your daughter is behind.

Answer 6

Technically, there is no such thing as being behind before the kid gets to school. Once she's in school, she'll be with lots of other kids who will get her more motivated. When my niece was that age she was the same way and her parents had to have the slightly older daughter to interpret for them.
Until they are in school there is really no good method to determine how advanced they are. The first 5 years they are learning at their own individual pace however you should not 'confuse' them by using baby talk or other other forms of talking down to them. At that age they will be learning by watching how things are done in the family such as counting, reading, speaking, etc.

Answer 7

If your worried take her to the Dr to get a check up. My daughter was the same. It was really hard for me as my oldest talked perfectly by 18 months and knew her ABC's and numbers. So I was always taking her to the Dr as I was so worried. They always said she was fine though. I blame her speech on my everyone speaking baby talk to her (my oldest was always spoken to as an adult ) and she learned alot of sign language at about 12 months as my friends son was having speech difficulties ( due to medical problems) so we all learned sign language to communicate with him.( He saw a speech therapist and now speaks fine)
My youngest is now a week away from turning 4 and her speech is greatly improved.( Some words are still difficult to dechipher) she is now intrested in learning ( she watches her older sister do homework) and she has started to write letters and numbers by herself. Although if I try to show her how to write or ask her to write something she gets upset and refuses to do it. She just likes to go at her own pace and do what she wants. I'm really proud write now as my oldest has just taught her to type Lucy on the computer!!
So I think your daughter is like mine and just isnt really intrested right now. Let her go at her own pace. She will get intrested eventually. But in the mean time go get her checked out by the Dr just to be sure. Good Luck

Answer 8

Take her to the local school and talk with a counselor about having her tested. Many children have speech problems also have problems with attention but do well after getting into a program at their school. Some kids are just harder to motivate you might find that with the teachers your child knows more than you think.

Answer 9

Call your doctor and have her evaluated. Make sure the doctor checks for ear problems. My daughter was like this and they put a set of tubes in her ear because she couldn't hear all that well and she caught up really fast. I never knew my daughter could not hear because she never had ear problems.
Also call your local school district and have a pre school evaluation done on her. These are really good and they always seem to find where they are behind.
Your doctor might also have some suggestions on how to get her caught up.

Answer 10

From what you've said, I wouldn't worry about those things at her young age. Every child develops at vastly different rates, and at 3.5 she's got plenty of time to "catch up." If you put a lot of pressure on yourself or she feels pressured, she may just refuse to listen to you (like my girls will do..) As long as you don't suspect a serious learning disabilty, I'd just keep incorporating some things into your daily play, and wait until she starts school to see if there's a problem. In Waldorf education, students aren't taught to read until first grade. She's got plenty of years ahead of her to learn everything there is to know.