I'm madly in love with a man who's in Iraq right now, we have had a good strong relationship for 8 months. He emails me & calls me as often as he can. I get a call this morning totally blindsides me. He asks me how my mom is, my family, we discuss possiable car choices for my new vehicle. And then he gets real quite and I ask him if he's okay, and he says, 'No I'm not.' (And that is breaking my heart) And I say, 'oh baby is there anything I can do to help?' And then he says I have to break up with you. I can't do this, both my job & have a girlfriend right now, my job is the most important thing, and I am going on a speical mission for months, so I won't be able to contact you, don't want you to worry about me. Besides your too good for me anyway. So I'm ending it. I'll call you once & a while if you want me too. And I'll give you a call as soon as I get home.' I'm very upset & crying at this point & saying 'what I don't get a choice?' him 'No, not this time.' I love you.
2007-01-06 21:47:34 · 8 answers · asked by Marie 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
and hangs up the phone. He also gave me the choice if I want him to contact me or not. I hurt so much right now I have no idea what to do. I don't know what I did wrong, I'm scared of loosing him but I'm scared of him ever coming back now too, because I don't trust him. What am I suppose to do? What is he asking me to do? I have no idea what he wants.
2007-01-06 21:49:45 · update #1
I am sorry that this has happened to you. I can actually see where he is coming from. I have been in the service, and I know how very hard it is to leave the one you love behind. At this moment there are so many thoughts going through his mind. He is about to go on a mission where there are so many uncertainties that lay ahead of him. He does not know the outcome. I believe in his mind he is thinking that it would actually be better if he did this previous to leaving on his mission that way if the unthinkable might happen it would not hurt you as much as if the two of you were still in a relationship. It is a hard chioce to make, but at the moment it would seem as the logical choice. It does not mean that his affections are still not as strong for you as ever. I believe that he would still want to hear from you. Reassurance of your feelings for him would no doubt do him an immence amount of good. I am sure once he gets back from this mission he would be overjoyed to hear from you. Keep in ggod spirits, this is only a little bump. I know as he is away from you his heart is still filled with love for you.
2007-01-06 22:00:03 · answer #1 · answered by ?Confused? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
either he's stressed out so much that he doesn't want any distractions right now, or maybe he's started dating someone else. It could be some girl that is over there in the service, or for a job, or he could have been corresponding w/ someone from his past and they've gotten serious.
Kinda wierd about his special mission...and him saying he won't be able to contact you. This leads me to believe there might be someone else. I had a friend once whose bf was a green beret...he was always on "special missions" but he could still contact her from time to time. Doesn't make sense that your bf would say that he couldn't.
If I were you, I guess I would just accept his decision. I mean for whatever reason he's made it, there's really not much you can do about it. I'd tell him to contact you when he got home, just so you knew that he was okay. And I'd tell him that I would be fine being an aquaintence or his, and let him know that you will be fine, life goes on....
2007-01-06 21:56:47 · answer #2 · answered by brittany 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, hon, I know having your heart broken really hurts. I can relate, and I'll say a prayer for you. Your man has obviously had a change of heart and no longer wants to be your boyfriend. My answer to you, girlfriend, is to cry on your best friends' shoulders, but then dry your tears, hold your head up high, and go on. I would strongly advise that you NOT correspond by phone with him, because that will keep you attached to a man who is no longer your boyfriend, and curb your mending process. I guarantee you will meet a man who really, truly wants to be with you and has no doubts, and you deserve that.
2007-01-06 21:56:07 · answer #3 · answered by Weezy D 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know it's hard for the both of you, but it is also terribly hard to maintain a relationship with someone you love so far away, it never works out.
2007-01-06 21:55:31 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well he sounds like he's got somebody else on the sideline. Forget about him, there are a lot of other good guys out there.
2007-01-06 22:01:23 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
how well do you know him? do you think he's being serious or being dramatic? either he has a girlfriend, boyfriend or really has no time to think of you and needs to focus on his job. dunno. ask his family or friends that know him. either you wait around for him to be really honest or he is being honest. either way. he's broken up with you. sadly. if he loves you he will comfort you. but he didnt. he hurt you. i hope you'll come to understand the truth or realize it. peace.
2007-01-06 21:55:47 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He sounds like he doesn't want to be with you anymore. find someone else. Life is too short.
2007-01-06 21:51:32 · answer #7 · answered by regwoman123 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hmm.. his decision sounds final... he decided already and i think theres nothing you can do about it to change his mind... but if you really loves him and he loves you too, maybe you'll just have to wait for him to take you back... thats the best thing you can do... i think...
2007-01-06 21:54:10 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋