Been reading about rapport. Apparently when I first start talking to a girl I should try and match her body (so if she crosses her leg, I do the same or if she leans forward I do too). I'm struggling with the concept because I fear that they would think I was weird or just imitating them (which is really what it boils down to).
Is this something I should be doing? I agree that it would make a person feel more comfortable if you were matching them in terms of their tone and body language.
Any advice on how I should do this without coming across as a 'copycat?
2007-01-06 20:39:23 · 7 answers · asked by Maggs 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Yes! I actually tried this and it has worked thus far. This is what you do: First, maintain some type of decent eye contact with her...girls really do use more eye contact than guys. Focus on using your peripheral field of vision to detect change in body position and tone. Basically, it is 'copycating' per se, but if you are doing the same thing they are doing they will think you understand them so well. Generally, your copy catting will not be detected, because a lot of people don't consciously pay attention to their body language and what they are portraying. Most people are on auto-pilot and have no idea what you are doing. I say give a test run and see what happens! I did and it is working in my favor.
2007-01-06 20:55:55 · answer #1 · answered by Kay 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have obviously been told to mirror a person in communicating with them. This shows a positive body language, however if you don't feel comfortable with this, maybe take note of what is happening but respond to some of what you see not ALL of it.
2007-01-07 04:58:04 · answer #2 · answered by Corrine L 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
rapport is a great technique...but it is not done so blindly...
u first need to make the girl comfortable ard u and slowly match her movements...... remember u need to match then not copy them blindly....u r a guy and she is a girl there is always a difference in the way we sit, act and move.......
so let the difference be there and remember to listen to what she is saying and expecting rather than just plainly copying anything............. have a nice time man!!!!!!
2007-01-07 04:58:59 · answer #3 · answered by sagitarius....25 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dont copy their exact move but react to it. For example she leans back from you then you should move back a bit. If both of you are sitting down and your laid back but she's sitting straight then try to sit properly. If you are in the same position while changes her body movements she might think you dont care or your a stiff with no confidence.
2007-01-07 04:46:58 · answer #4 · answered by jason j 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I agree with you. If someone did that around me, it would make me feel very uncomfortable. Just be relaxed, open, spontaneous, down-to-earth and the person you're with will believe you to be honest, non-judgmental and feel at ease in your company.
2007-01-07 04:44:54 · answer #5 · answered by Babs 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you dont need to immiate what shes doing. if she leans in you could tilt your head slightly most important thing is dont lean away and dont lose eye contact
2007-01-07 04:43:09 · answer #6 · answered by AliasPlease 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have never heard of this before.
2007-01-07 04:42:15 · answer #7 · answered by Liz 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋