Just got dumped. Was she never into me?

Question

Dated for three months and I am 30 she is 20. For the last six weeks she stopped the sex, affection, kissing, cuddling, everything but calling and hanging out. When confronted she says its her migraines, low libido, and that she is not feeling well. Naturally, we got into lots of arguments and fights because i thought she wasn't into me. Three days ago she dumps me because she says she is tired of not giving me what i want or making me happy that she is sick of feeling like she is doing something wrong. I just wanted to be treated like a boyfriend. Not get yelled at and just a simple holding hands would have been enough for me. I called her twice and texted to apologize for any selfishness. She told me by text "I think we shouldn't see each other till i feel better. It's too hard" that is all she said. Was I selfish and if so how do i get her back? Or was she just never in to me and used her health as an excuse? I am filled with guilt was she just too young? I am confused.

Answer 1

Not to worry, the best medicine is to head on out and do some things that you really like doing, go to a live sports game, basketball, hockey anything that is a change of pace. If she wants to see you she will let you know. If you really need to see whats going on wait a week or two then give her a call and ask her how she is and if she would enjoy doing ___ or going to ___ that you used to both liked. In the mean time help yourself and any potential getting back together by doing something that improves yourself. take a short class or course in anything that may be of interest, In the worse case you might call her in a couple of weeks and have a new project that you are working on and see if she might get interested also. (either in helping you with yours, or starting one of her own) Anyway ther is not much else you can do and you can't make someone fall for you, it just has to happen and it always has to be a Win Win situation for it to last. Just chill and wait and see.

Answer 2

She's only 20 and there is still a lot of things for her to experience and learn in life. She may feel that the relationship is getting too serious and it's not what she wants right now. It's nothing that you did wrong. Not all 20 year old women are the same, but in your situation, it sounds like she's realizing that she may need some time to herself and space to find out what she really needs at this moment. She didn't want to hurt your feelings or make you feel bad, that's why she made up excuses that seem to point the finger at her and not you. Maybe you can step back and let her have the time that she requires.

Answer 3

First of all, drop the whole age issue. It shouldn't be one if you two are on the same page. I have always dated guys who are older than myself for maturity-involved reasons, so don't feel guilty over the age difference.
It honestly sounds like she is just ready to move on. Twenty is a hard age, and (for most) generally not a time in your life when you are ready to "settle down". As far as her never being into you...that's not true. Of course she was into you, she had to be to have started seeing you in the first place. If you were getting yelled at, it might not be a bad idea for you to drop the whole thing and move on. You deserve better treatment than that.
Take care! :)

Answer 4

Did you ever tell her that holding hands was enough?? Maybe you never said a lot of things... and you should have taken it slow, as there is a lot of age difference. Let her be and move on.
You are better off dating women in the 25-35 bracket.

Answer 5

Man I feel you for sure..
Being a complete outsider to your situation I can definately say that she sucks! Do yourself a huge favor and just put it behind you.. I know it is so hard cause all you want is just some affection but 20 is WAAYYY young and there are tons of good chicks out there for you.. and there is even probably one that is perfect for you. Dont feel like you need to appologize for anything if you know you are a good dude, ok!?

Answer 6

I don't think it was you, I think it was her way of getting out of the relationship so that she can do whatever she wants, without the guilt. She's still young and dumb, consider yourself lucky. You seem like a sweet person that deserves better. 6 month's isn't a long time to set the foundation for a serious relationship.

Answer 7

Maybe she was sick of being hassled. I have suffered serious health problems in the past, along similar lines. My bf at the time kept hassling me to do stuff, to have sex, to go out drinking and partying etc. He seemed to think I was making stuff up too. I ended up dumping him over it. Maybe you should have been more supportive.

Answer 8

Did she see a doctor?
It is hard to say.But my gut says she was just looking for a way out.
But if you really love her then contact her and say all of this to her.
That holding hands is enough till she feels better and you want to be there for her.Just like you would hope she would be there for you if you were sick.
Then if she says no no i am sick blah blah then she was looking for way out.

Answer 9

I'm sorry to tell you this dude, shes just not into you

I never have this problem with chicks, but my friends tells me the same story, what you need to do is to get a different chick, you need soemone who will get you laid, and surprise you with some 3rd base action.

don't think about getting her back, she's 10 yrs younger then you, all she cares about is hotter guys and better future

good luck sir

Answer 10

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