I'm in love with a guy that I've been with for 1yr 1/2. I knew that he had Seasonal Affective Disorder but I didn't see it effect him 'til this winter season. At the start of November he started to get antsy about our relationship (long distance) once in a while but seemed to have a different opinion every day. By December he was getting drunk a couple times a week and calling me and being a bit beligerent, but would call and apologize the next day. When sober he still had huge mood swings.
By the end of December, he was being 'civil' to me and told me he needed some space to sort through things so that he didn't snap on me and lose me forever. New Years eve he snapped. He called me several times while wasted to call me bad names and left a message for me insulting my entire family and telling me I should kill myself. I left a message for him that night telling him I couldn't be his gf after he said those things but I still loved him. Haven't heard from him since.
2007-01-06 16:21:30 · 10 answers · asked by sarahjaniepoo 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I called him mom a couple days ago and she informed me of some really crappy family stuff that was going on that he hadn't told me about. I guess he'd been pretty upset about that. So he basically took out his anger on me. I CAN"T call him first, but I want to so bad....even if it's just to check that he's okay. I want to be there for him.
2007-01-06 16:22:57 · update #1
It's a tough position to be in. This guy needs help. Unless you want to spend your life being his target every time he's upset about anything or anyone, then I suggest you may want to cut lose now. Tell him that he needs to get counselling and anger management to learn to cope and deal with his issues. In the meantime, if it's possible, just be a friend.
2007-01-06 16:26:52 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You did the right thing Honey!
I suspect that you are still fairly young, so you don't have the time or the skill to take on a hard up case like this guy, & fix him. It's not your responsibility.
The only responsibility you have is to yourself, & staying involved with a depressed drunk, who gets abusive when he does, is not a way to take proper care of yourself.
So cut him loose, & keep him at a long distance with confidence that you are doing what is best for you.
BTW, it's OK to love him, & cut him out of your life as well.
I hope you find a boyfriend who can give you all of the attention, caring, & love that you deserve.
2007-01-07 00:30:32 · answer #2 · answered by No More 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Any guy that talks to you like that when he is upset is a jerk and his actions will only escalate.
Think when he has a 2 year old that throws grape juice on his white rug, will he scream at her? Will he stumble in drunk infront of her?
This guy is an obvious punk. No matter what the prob is no-one has the right to talk down to you like that, you wouldn;t take it from a friend, a family member, a stranger-why tolerate it from him. Good riddance. he isnt worth your time or tears.
2007-01-07 00:25:50 · answer #3 · answered by surfer_grl_ca 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Please don't call him. You are better off without him. My sister in-law has been married over 40 years to a man who goes off on her. He wakes her up from sleep to start on her for no reason. If a man treats you this way before you marry him. When he gets a marriage license he will only get worse. Please think of the worse time with him and just imagine it 200 times worse than that time.
2007-01-07 00:32:39 · answer #4 · answered by seekinghisface1974 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sure you can go back to him if you like a lot of drama in your life and a lot of abuse.
But from what you describe, this guy is a basket case and you don't need this in your life.
Move on, it just isn't worth the price you have to pay.
2007-01-07 00:28:16 · answer #5 · answered by Gnome 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I say cut your losses and end this. If he thinks he can keep being abusive the minute other things bother him you don't want to live your life like that.
2007-01-07 00:27:01 · answer #6 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well I honestly wouldnt put up with that.. that is mean even though he has something. isnt he takin meds? He shouldnt snap on u like that. I wouldnt put up with him. You should TRY to move on tho it will be hard. im sorry
2007-01-07 00:23:39 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Why can't you call him first? Since you know he has this problem why are you acting so surprised and hurt? Either you care about him or you don't....
2007-01-07 00:25:56 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
see if u really care for him...u wil b there with him always...n i m sure he wil also do the same for u....jus talk with him...u dont knw that ur one sweet sentence can change some ones whole world...n can make him feel better.....
2007-01-07 00:26:09 · answer #9 · answered by buddy 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Don't go back.
2007-01-07 00:23:02 · answer #10 · answered by S K 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋