wedding question?

Question

whats a polite and non intrusive way to ask for money instead of gifts at your wedding and also whats the polite way to ask for no children to attend.

Answer 1

Never mention money, gift registry, etc. on an invitation. Although most places that have registries (i.e. Target, Bloomingdales, etc.) give out little cards to put in the invitation that say "we're registered here"- it is considered tacky to do so. Any additional details, such as money or registries, are stated to be strictly word-of-mouth. Nowadays, most couples will start their "wedding website", with information on there about the ceremony, reception, and any other information. You put the website address in with the save-the-date card/invitations, and people can log on to see more details. That is the best place to put that you don't want gifts.

And about with wanting the ceremony to be adults only. Most people had good suggestions, like address it to the specific people, stating that we have X amount of seats reserved for you... but just remember, that no matter how hard you try, there will be a good chance that at least a couple children will end up being there.

Answer 2

You dont ask for money whatsoever from your guests. You can have one of the bridal party spread it word of mouth- or not register for any gifts, but in the end the guests will give you what they want. If it is money that you want, maybe you can have a dollar tree or dollar dance at your reception.

As far as requesting no children, you can address the invites specifically to the adults, such as Mr. and Mrs John Smith, instead of The Smith Family. You can put on the invite "You are welcome to join us immediately after the wedding for an adults only reception". That is not asking for much. However, it would be prudent to at least offer the names of some reliable sitters in your area in case you have some guests from out of town who may come with kids. Or you can arrange a room for children to be entertained in. Me personally though, if the invite said "Adults only reception", I would find a sitter before the big day, or if that were impossible to do, I would politely decline the invitation. There is nothing wrong with not wanting small ones at your event.

Answer 3

I received a wedding invitation asking for money and it was a big turn off. Simply don't do it. You should register somewhere but do not put it in your invitation. The last thing you want to do is tell people that as a condition of their coming to your wedding is that they need to bring a gift. SO AVOID THAT TOO. Word spreads among your friends where you are registered at. Chances are though that people who do still do not know where you are registered at, will most likely give you a check. BUT PLEASE - DO NOT ASK FOR MONEY.

The " no children " part is pretty standard. Look online for wedding invitations and see how it is done.

Answer 4

Don't shoot the answerer, but you are getting in etiquette trouble with both of these.
There is no "polite" way to ask for money; it is rude and tacky, simply not done. If you really don't want gifts, you can say so - but don't ask for money instead.
About the children - they deserve to attend a wedding along with their families. That's what a wedding is, a celebration of a new beginning for a couple, at which everyone, family and friends of all ages, gather to celebrate. Don't exclude them.
Wish you luck, ta!

Answer 5

About the money, You will get money at your wedding. But a good way to do that is to set up a savings account or bond. put it in your registry. Many people will like the idea because they won't have to go shopping. they know you will love it and use it more than any other gift they could give you. As for the no children thing...try to provide daycare.

Answer 6

You planned for It, paid for It and deserve to have It the way you want. You must be open and honest from the beginning. For your wedding you would want to put "Greenback wedding" which Is the nicest way of saying you will not be excepting gifts. As for the children, you could put It on a separate card and reference to It being an adults only event which Is less likely to be negative. Send It with the Invitation. Use psychology. The statement "This too Is a day for you to enjoy, leave the kids at home" will bring some of those not so understanding parents to your corner

Answer 7

There is absolutely no polite way to ask for money in lieu of gifts--period! If you want to tell you parents and bridesmaids, they can let people know if they're asked, but, beyond that, there should never be any formal request for money. The best way to avoid having children at a reception is not to invite them. Invite "Mr. and Mrs. John Smith" and don't mention anything about "family" or the names of the children. If Mr. and Mrs. Smith RSVP that they're bringing their 2 kids with them, call them and very sweetly tell them how delighted you are that they're coming but, unfortunately, there isn't room or budget to accommodate children so you hope they can get a sitter. If they push, don't cave in and let them know that you and your family agreed that it will be an adults-only reception. If they get huffy and say they aren't coming, simply say you'll miss them and bid them good-bye. Parents who receive invitations that don't name their children should know better than to think they're invited too.

Answer 8

First:
We had two un-invited children at our wedding. In retrospect we should have written "Adult Reception will immediately follow the ceremony at ABC Banquet Hall"

Second:
everyone knows you want money. You don't need to put it on the invitation. My suggestion is to register for only a few rather expensive things. Anyone who looks at the registry will decide for themselves to give you money. Also, your mother's can help with this. People will be calling them to get gift ideas. Your mother's can discreetly say "Between you and me, they really just need some financial help. Please don't tell them that I told you that. You know how hard the first year of marriage can be"

Answer 9

In the invitation call it an Adult reception and consider a venue that won't allow children.People will buy what they want or give money if they want. Register for big items and people are more likely to chip in for them or give money towards them. Let family know you would prefer money and let word of mouth get the message out. I just got married and we only received gifts from close family that knew what we wanted the rest was money. Keep in mind if people give you money they will expect to see what the money went towards in their thank you cards.

Answer 10

As for the money there isn't a nice way to do that. You could always have a registry at a certain store and then return all the gifts or you'll just havta be a little rude. You could write adults only reception/party on your invites to preent children but some people are just rude like that and bring them.

Good luck.